Introduction

Hey everybody, this is the first of a weekly segment I'd like to start covering this year's Spring college football season. If you're interested in helping coordinate this, please contact me at [email protected], or if you have any updates or changes to my list, please give me an update via this Google form. This post will be a bit longer than the future ones will be while I introduce things, so bear with me a bit.
If there's one silver lining to Covid-19, it's that we get more college football. Just over two-and-a-half-weeks after the close of the 2020 Fall Football season, the colleges and conferences who elected to defer their season to the Spring of 2021 are kicking off their games, with DIII's American Southwest Conference (ASC), Southern Athletic Association (SAA), and Northwest Conference (NWC) planning to play a total of eight games.
I recently finished going through the posted schedule of every single NCAA football team and creating a document which organizes those schedules into a single source and organized two different ways: You can see the entire schedule broken up day by day or you can look at the schedule of each individual program playing an NCAA team. I could have also looked through the NAIA and NCFA, but the NCAA schedules proved volatile enough that I decided not to in the end. I think the format of the sheet is fairly self-explanatory, but just in case it's not, here's a basic guide:

For games played by Independents (regardless of level), the "conference" box is colored yellow; additionally, the team who is independent has "(IND)" next to their name. Note that Barton College, who has a scheduling alliance with the SAC for the season, is still counted as an independent
Inter-conference games are colored orange in the "conference" column.
Inter-division games are denoted with an asterisk (*) in the "Division" column
There are a few schedules with "TBA" games listed. Those have red colored words in the team name row and have their "conference" box colored red.
A few games are listed as "scrimmage games" or "neutral site games" -- see the "comments" column for those games.
Any time there was a scheduling conflict, or any time only one of the two competing schools had a schedule posted, the row was colored pink and an explanation was put in the "comments" box. If the row is colored pink but the box is empty that means it conflicts with another scheduled game and an explanation is elsewhere, generally close by.

The sheet also has a few other useful tabs: first is a list of teams who played last Fall who are also planning on playing this Spring, or at the least have not officially ruled out playing this Spring. Colleges who played (or attempted to play) in the Fall are listed alphabetically, along with a simple display of their schedule. If it's not currently clear whether the team plans to play or not, their name is highlighted yellow and there's a note indicating as much beside them. There are currently 28 teams who played in the fall and either plan to play this spring or have not formally ruled out playing in the Spring. Most of them played 3-or-fewer games against either Fall opt-ins who needed to round out their schedule, or schools who attempted to start competition in the Fall before postponing to the Spring.
The fourth tab is a list of teams who are confirmed to not be playing this Spring. This list does not include teams who obviously played a full Fall slate of games unless the team played independently of their conference whose other members are playing this Spring. I tried to be pretty conservative with inclusions on this list.
The fifth tab is a list of schools who are officially unannounced on the topic of whether they will play this Spring or not. Many of them may be assumed to be not playing, however several conferences have put out statements to the effect that they are still evaluating current options and that a Spring schedule is not out of the question.
Finally, the sixth tab is a sortable "standings" list of each school who has played so far. It's nothing super fancy and only includes cumulative records, but is a good visual aid.

Notes of Interest

While none of the teams are playing yet, look forward to next week when we get our first Division I level games.
New Mexico State is the only D-I FBS team playing this Spring; several FCS teams are also playing.
Though all members of the Great Lakes Intercollegiate Athletic Conference (GLIAC, D-II) are allowed to independently schedule games, currently the only member who has chosen to publicly do so is Saginaw Valley State, who plans to play one game on March 6th.
Despite most conferences being conference only and home/away only, there are a few neutral site games, most of which will be played by HBCUs. The first will be Grambling State vs Prairie View A&M on February 27th in the Cotton Bowl, and the second between Mt. Union and Muskingum on March 12th (I believe the schedules both count this as a home game for Muskingum but I chose not to since it's played in Zanesville and not a town either team is based in). The third game will be Savannah State vs West Alabama in Mobile, AL, and the fourth in Shreveport's Independence Stadium will be played by Grambling State and Southern on April 17th. The final scheduled neutral site game of the season will be the Magic City Classic between Alabama A&M and Alabama State. Scheduled to also be played on the 17th, this game will be played in Birmingham's Legion Field (home of the former Birmingham Iron -- Forge On!).
There are a few games which are tentatively scheduled, but probably the most interesting is the 4/17 matchup between Erskine and Limestone, which will only be played if Limestone fails to make the South Atlantic Conference (SAC) championship.

Week 1 in Spring CFB

Here, I'll give a quick introduction to the currently-planned slate of games for each coming week. A week runs from Thursday to Wednesday, much like the NFL, so this week starts today (2/4) and ends 2/10; this isn't really an issue this week but will be in later weeks. Later I'll try to make a table of the previous week's games, but since this is the first week we don't have any of those yet. I'll also try to include (legal) links to where you can stream the games online, if the team offers such a service.
Times are not guaranteed to be accurate; as a general rule they should follow the time-zone of the home state, but I didn't always check. Also, sometimes, two schedules would list two different times for the same game. I'd generally just stick with whichever one I saw first.
Week 1

DATE	TIME	HOME	AWAY	LOCATION	CONFERENCE	DIVISION	WATCH
2/6	12:00 PM	Belhaven	Mary Hardin-Baylor	Jackson, MS	ASC	DIII	link
2/6	12:00 PM	Millsaps (MS)	Hendrix	Jackson, MS	SAA	DIII	link
2/6	12:00 PM	Puget Sound	Pacific Lutheran	Tacoma, WA	NWC	DIII	link
2/6	12:00 PM	Trinity (TX)	Austin (TX)	San Antonio, TX	SAA	DIII	link
2/6	1:00 PM	Howard Payne	Texas Lutheran	Brownwood, TX	ASC	DIII	link
2/6	1:00 PM	McMurry	Sul Ross State	Abilene, TX	ASC	DIII	link
2/6	1:00 PM	Southwestern (TX)	East Texas Baptist	Georgetown, TX	ASC	DIII	N/A
2/6	6:00 PM	Rhodes (TN)	Birmingham-Southern	Memphis, TN	SAA	DIII	N/A

STANDINGS

For a while I wrestled over whether I wanted to include the records of teams who competed in the Fall in this section. What I think I've decided to do is present them here by record and include their Spring and Overall record later on but rate teams by Spring record only, but I'll still present the overall record just for edification. This won't ever be anything super scientific, just a look at each team's winning percentage ordered by whoever's played the most games to help remove the noise of a new week of conference play as each conference starts up.
For this pre-season ranking, I'll only be looking at teams who are currently confirmed to be playing this Spring.
1. Trine (IN) (2-0) - 1

The only competing team with multiple wins and no losses in the Fall, Trine leads the pack for the pre-Spring season after wins over Michigan Intercollegiate Athletic Association (MIAA) foe Adrian (44-27) and a shutout against Manchester University (37-0). They look to return with a conference-only slate.

2. Bluffton (1-0) - 1

Bluffton beat Arian College (MI) in a close 28-21 game on October 24th; they had a second game scheduled against Trine which they were forced to cancel due to new travel restrictions in Ohio.

3. North Dakota State (1-0) - 1

The Bison won their sole scheduled game of the Fall 2020 season against Central Arkansas 39-28, defeating the vagrant A-SUN team in a game played primarily to get highly-touted QB Trey Lance some publicity before the NFL draft.

4. Southern Illinois (1-0) - 1

Southern Illinois defeated Southeast Missouri 20-17 in the only game either team played this Fall.

5. Jacksonville State (3-1) - 0.75

Though technically the team on this list with the most wins, Jacksonville State is held back by their loss to Florida State (24-41). Otherwise, the Gamecocks made a strong showing this Fall, taking down Mercer (34-28), North Alabama (24-17), and Florida International (19-10).

T-6. UT Chattanooga & Southeast Missouri (0-1) - 0

Both Chattanooga and Southeast Missouri lost their only games of the Fall season by narrow margins, with the Mocs losing 10-13 to Western Kentucky and the Redhawks losing 17-20 to Southern Illinois.

8. Manchester (IN) (0-2) - 0

Manchester lost both the games they played this Fall, getting blown out by both Trine (0-37) and Adrian (10-41).

T-9. Mercer, Missouri State, & Western Carolina (0-3) - 0

Mercer's three losses are mostly fairly respectable, falling to Jacksonville State (28-34) and Abilene Christian (17-20) by close scores, however, the Bears' third loss to Army (3-49) is a little harder to stomach. Missouri State had a similar fate, falling to Oklahoma (0-48) but doing respectably against Central Arkansas (20-27 and 24-33). Western Carolina, on the other hand, played tough games against the strong Flames of Liberty (14-58) and Tar Heels of North Carolina (9-49). Their loss to Eastern Kentucky (17-49) was a bit more humbling.

12. The Citadel (0-4) - 0

The Citadel's closest game was a 9-14 loss to Army, and from there things got worse for the Bulldogs quickly. 20+ point losses to South Florida (6-27) and Eastern Kentucky (14-37) sandwiched a 0-49 shutout at the hands of Clemson.

13. University of the Incarnate Word (0-0)

The Cardinals attempted to play Arkansas State this Fall but had the game canceled due to Covid. It feels unfair to rank them 13th for not playing a game, but it would feel more wrong to rank them ahead of teams who actually played.

Closing

I hope y'all enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed putting it together. Like I mentioned in the introduction, any and all help is appreciated! Looking forward to hearing what everyone thinks or is looking forward to for this Spring's football season!

Illinois restrictions and massage program advice

[Table] I'm Jeff Galak, Professor of Marketing & Social and Decision Science at Carnegie Mellon University. I have published dozens of academic papers on decision making, consumer behavior, and more. I have also recently launched a new YouTube channel called Data Demystified. AMA! (pt 1/3)

Source | Signoff
Note: This table may potentially contain information that can be construed as self-doxxing. Please don't actually try to take advantage of this.

Questions	Answers
Hey Jeff! I'm a minimalist & find that I'm happier with less stuff & when I give/receive experiences rather than items. Do you find consumer happiness reflects this shift towards minimalism since that is a (small, but seemingly growing) trend, especially among Millennials?	Great question! There is some relatively new research looking at happiness from experiences vs. material possessions. Most of it shows that happiness from equally valued (e.g. price) experiences is higher than for possessions. HOWEVER, and this is a big however, all that work tends to ignore long run happiness with highly prized possessions. For instance, if you have a sentimentally valued object, happiness that stems from that object lasts for a long time. What most possessions don't do is provide long lasting happiness. You buy a new shiny toy and it DOES make you happy...but that happiness goes away quickly. My collaborators and I have termed this idea "Hedonic Decline."
	So as for minimalism, there is not evidence that I know of that shows that less possessions make you happier. There's plenty showing that more possessions don't make you happier, but that's not the same thing.
	One more layer of complexity: there are two routes to happiness: hedonic and eudaimonic. The former is what we usually think of when we think of happiness: how much joy does XYZ bring me. The latter, however, is closer to self-actualization. It's the happiness the comes from a accomplishing something....even if there was pain involved in getting there. I wonder if minimalism can increase eudaimonic happiness.
^{the below is a reply to the above}
That's interesting. Thank you for responding. In the minimalism community, self-actualization is reflected in endeavors such as achieving certain goals (like, paying off debt) that usually involves some amount of self-discipline &/or self-sacrifice.	I'd say that the vast majority of research in happiness excludes eudaimonic happiness, largely because it's so hard to measure. My personal, non-data supported, take is that eudaimonic happiness is far more important than hedonic happiness. The latter is fleeting, whereas the former can be life changing.
^{the below is a reply to the above}
Beautifully said.	Thank you.
^{the below is another reply to the second answer}
How does depression affect eudaimonic happiness compared to hedonic happiness?	Great question and I don't know the answer. Social Psychology typical studies what we very poorly term "normal" psychology, which excludes clinical conditions like depression. Sorry!
^{the below is another reply to the second answer}
What’s your take on “pay to play” - as in, some “hedonic” purchases at are required to signal you’re in the game, making progress on eudaimonic happiness. When you get older and into your career, I’d venture many people have already figured out that hedonic happiness doesn’t do squat long-term, but there’s a balance in terms of how much hedonic happiness to have to acquire for the ultimate long-term eudaimonic happiness. Example: in sales, which I’m in tech analytics sales, companies want to spend for solutions to business problems, but they also want to see, visually, that the person they’re paying is a good representative for them. High cost equals a person that can represent that taste. Nice. Tailored suits, a nice watch and latest tech gadgets. There’s a pay to play aspect that signals to the world who I am, and that in turn actually allows me to get what I want- student loans paid off and early retirement..	I don't think there's any conflict here. If you will find some form of life satisfaction by succeeding in your career, there's no harm in also purchasing items that help you reach that goal. Those items can, in and of themselves, make you happy...nothing wrong with that. More to the point, hedonic and eudaimonic happiness don't have to be in opposition. You can have both!
^{the below is another reply to the original answer}
I really like this response. While i can jive with basic premise of experiences over possessions...i’m find it used a lot by people who actually just want to shirk obligation. I run HHiring and there is a persistent trend of people not wanting to act like their job is important..just because it’s easier to justify bailing on work/shifts to go do things when you can say you’re doing it for the experience, not focusing on the money you make at a job. I’m trying to figure out the best way to respond to people who think i’m some big bad money grubbing boss for wanting people to do their jobs. Meanwhile, in my personal life...i feel like i’m getting a lot of push back socially from people who think i should only work where i can just make my own schedule and dip put for an “experience” whenever. At the end of the say, it feels like people will just wax philosophic reasons for demanding leisure with all the material perks of having jobs and working.	Great point. This relates to intrinsic vs. extrinsic motivation. The former is the desire to do something because it's inherently interesting/rewarding. The latter is doing something for compensation. This is more in the realm of organizational behavior, and you'll have to wait for my wife who is also a professor, but of organizational behavior and theory, to do an AMA for more on that :)
Hello, thanks for doing this. Are you familiar with "loot boxes" in video games? I feel like the topics of a lot of your papers would fit right into why consumers/businesses use loot boxes. How does a loot box mechanic differ from gambling and should it be treated the same? (Regulation, age restriction, etc) If they are the same, how do you feel about video games including a loot box mechanic? Sticking with gambling parallels, what are your thoughts on video game companies targeting "whales" given that gamers can be any age nowadays?	I'm not a gamer myself (though I do love TTPRGs and run a D&D 5e campaign), but I'm pretty familiar with loot boxes. Mobile games and social media platforms in general have become very good at continuous reinforcement. It can be the allure of getting a new outfit in a loot box or just an upvote on Reddit...the point is that we are wired to love small rewards, even if those rewards are meaningless. Casinos have mastered this art and loot boxes are an capitalizing of the same basic psychological mechanisms: need for positive reinforcements. So are loot boxes the same as gambling? Probably not the SAME, but damn close. As for regulation, I am strongly in favor of making gambling of all forms only accessible to adults and even then providing access to counseling for those who suffer from gambling addiction.
	I have a lot less sympathy towards wealthy adults who choose to gamble as a form of entertainment. The problem is that it's not always obvious who's a whale and who's just pretending to be one for the attention. The latter is highly susceptible to financial ruin and I'd want them protected just the same as they are with standard gambling.
^{the below is a reply to the above}
Do you find the researcher in you observing and asking questions about the players' decision making processes in your D&D campaign? My old DM minored in psychology, and I often felt like a rat in his experiments. I enjoyed it, though. It kind of added an extra facet to the game.	More than my research, teaching has made a huge difference in being a DM. When I lecture, I am forced to be quick on my feet to understand student questions, reply accordingly, and make sure that I'm moving the lecture along. That is the same with DMing. I need to be able to understand the motives of my players, respond appropriately with NPCs, and keep the story going.
	I'm sure that my knowledge of psychology helps, but I wouldn't think it influences the way I DM (or play) that much.
^{the below is a reply to the above}
Studying business Psychology in Switzerland and leading the yawning portal atm, seems like I need to start teaching :p	Ha! Check out this thread: https://www.reddit.com/WaterdeepDragonHeist/comments/fcc89a/the_yawning_portal_a_drinking_song_and_boss_music/
	I used that for my game and it was great.
^{the below is another reply to the original answer}
Could I join your 5e campaign?	Ha! Sorry, no. It's just close friends and we're months into it. I'm running Waterdeep, if you're curious.
^{the below is a reply to the above}
I'm applying to Carnegie's MBA for what it's worth! If I'm accepted, may I join then? ;-)	How about you get in and then we discuss!
Hi Jeff! What is your favorite heuristic or logical fallacy when it comes to decision making? Can you teach us about one that people might not know about?	Easy: Diversification Bias. That's where I started my career 15 years ago. I didn't discover this bias, but have built on it. Anyway, it's the idea that people choose more variety than they should. For example, if you are going to pick some snacks for the next few days, you might pick: chips, pretzels and an apple. Those are fine, but really chips are your favorite and you picked the other two because you thought you'd get tired of chips every day. Well, turns out you'd be wrong. A day is enough to reset satiation/hedonic-decline in most cases, so you'd be better off always picking your favorite option! Doing otherwise means eating snacks that are less preferred.
	A new one that my doctoral student, Julian Givi, and I recently published: The Future Is Now (FIN) Heuristic. It's the idea that people believe that future events will be like present events, even when evidence points to the contrary. An example: if it's sunny today, you're more likely to think it'll be sunny tomorrow, even if the forecast clearly predict rain. What happens is you treat information about the present as having evidentiary value for future events, even when that's just not true.
^{the below is a reply to the above}
I really like that you give your student credit.	PhD students do all the hard work. Professors just bask in the glory :)
^{the below is another reply to the original answer}
I think diversification bias is how I ended up with 5 shades of blue nail polish that are virtually undistinguishable from each other! Interesting to consider.	Ha! Just might be...
Tell me about your paper "Sentimental value and gift giving: Givers’ fears of getting it wrong prevents them from getting it right". From what I read of the abstract, it seems that gift-givers undervalue sentimental value, seeing it as riskier. Why is that, and how can we give better gifts?	Sure, this is a paper with my former doctoral student, Julian Givi. Basically, people are risk averse in gift giving when they shouldn't be. If I know you like coffee and I have a choice to give you some nice coffee beans or a framed photo of the two of us (presumably since we're friends), I give the former b/c it's a sure bet. But as the recipient, overwhelmingly, people prefer the latter. So givers should take the risk and give the sentimentally valuable gift over one that is more a sure bet.
^{the below is a reply to the above}
Interesting. When giving presents, givers focus too much on the recipient's known wants, which gets in the way of giving a meaningful present. Thank you! I'll be sure to keep that in-mind next Christmas.	That's exactly it.
^{the below is another reply to the original answer}
I sometimes hesitate at this. I don’t want to come off as the selfie culture of all about me in pictures! But relatives do love getting pics of the kids for gifts. Still, how often is this perceived as a form of narcissism by the gift receiver? Edit: pictures of my kids not just me!	One trick we do: every Christmas holiday we print full size calendars with our kids pictures on them. That's our holiday gift to all the grandparents. They LOVE it.
	We also send small photo books to the grandparents throughout the year of some of the best pictures we take.
	We have yet to send too many, but that's specific to our family.
	The best advice I always have for something like this is: just ask! People are often worried about asking gift recipients about their preferences, but our research shows that a) recipients don't care about being asked and b) you can give better gifts that way.
Hi Jeff ! I have a question regarding involvement in a purchase, is there an increasing trend to become highly involved in the purchase of even low value object ? I find myself doing this during the pandemic doing comparison searches for a bulb which costs 10 dollars. Is this an exception ? Or is there some underlying psychological reason isolated to me ?	Absolutely. Two reasons this could be happening. 1) With more free time, the threshold for what merits deep research drops a lot. 2) Many people are facing financial hardships, and so making sure every dollar is well spent becomes really important.
Hi Jeff, Thank you for the great AMA. Where do you see the future of insights departments in consumer companies? Most companies looks like giving up on ethnographic and in person research and focus on data analytics. I speculate management is under great pressure and in the meantime aspire to Google, Amazon etc. What is your take of insights departments future in large companies?	Thank you! Exploratory research like ethnographies, interviews, and focus groups is really useful for brainstorming. But they are a poor substitute for quantitative data. Now, that doesn't mean "big data"...just data that has larger samples and is better representative of populations. Surveys are still amazing. When we want to forecast an election, we don't use big data, we conduct a political poll. They work.
	But yes, right now, AI and machine learning are the hot new ideas on the block and everyone wants in on them. There is plenty of amazing applications of AI/ML, but what they can't do is tell you "why". As in, why did someone choose this option over that one? Or why are people motivated by this goal or that goal? Those types of answers allow you to apply knowledge in completely novel contexts. AI/ML needs to be trained on a specific type of data for a specific type of task. It is AMAZING at that. But as soon as you introduce a new context or new set of experiences, it fails. That's where good old fashioned surveys and behavioral experiments come in.
If a program was built to help us make better decisions, do you think we would use it? Do you think we can listen to a program’s advice better than we do from experts?	We already do. Weather forecasts tell us how to dress. Facebook tells us what to think. Tinder tells us who to date. Etc... etc...
	A program that EXPLICITLY tells you what to do won't work too well. People like to feel like they have free will. They don't, though. We are greatly influenced by our environment (not just technology) whether we know it or not. As one example: I can guess your weight reasonably well just by knowing your zip code (please don't make me actually do this as I'm not in the business of public shaming!). If we had true free will and agency, that should be impossible. Instead, we are the products of our environment.
^{the below is a reply to the above}
60641	Chicago? I believe Illinois has 30-35% obesity (I'm doing this quickly and not looking at your zip specifically), so pretty high weight.
Hi Jeff! Since I'm a 14 yrs old and knew nothing about what you study, I have very limited questions I can ask. But as I have observed, people are often sheepish and will consume as the trend goes. What is the most unexpected trend, worldwide? P.S. will defo check out your channel	I don't expect most people to know my work (I like to think my ego isn't THAT big!), so no worries!
	You're right. Trends will drive a lot of human behavior. We are social creatures and follow what others do much more than we care to admit. As for the most unexpected trend, that's really hard to say. Maybe this is too broad, but I'm surprised by how short people's attention span is when it comes to current events. News cycles used to last for weeks, now they last for hours. I suppose I know that people don't have long attention spans, but I'm still surprised.
^{the below is a reply to the above}
Any underlying reasoning for this?	For the short attention spans? We can invoke evolutionary psychology, which I'm not a big fan of, and it would suggest something like a tensions between exploring and cultivating. So it would argue that our ancestors needed to have some reason to leave their immediate tribe to find new resources. So perhaps our attention spans are short b/c of this and the current environment exaggerates that behavior.
Have you done(or can you point to) any research relating to the decision making/not making around getting rid of possessions? I have a relative who keeps anything that has a perceived value as in could be sold on ebay/garage sale which they never sell. They are otherwise rational, clean, don't over consume..def not hoarder territory.. but I struggle to convince them that the old digital camera that's been sitting for 3 years could just be disposed of.	Hoarding is definitely a thing. There isn't much in the study of item disposition in the empirical world of research (lots of interesting qualitative work that I'm less familiar with). The big exception to this is the Endowment Effect. The short version is that you value items you own more than if you don't own it. So a mug sitting on a store shelf is worth, say $10 to you, but as soon as you own it is worth, say, $20 to you. Nothing changed except your ownership of it. That explains some of hoarding behavior, but not all of it.
	For a qualitative research paper on the topic, see here: https://www.ingentaconnect.com/content/mcb/216/2010/00000013/00000001/art00001
^{the below is a reply to the above}
I suppose I have the Endowment Effect. Everytime I find something valuable i dont have the will to let it go. Even though i can sell it and re buy it later, or buy something similar haha. It's like I want to take the most of it and use it til it brakes, go missing, or whatever.	The endowment effect isn't infinite. As in, it's not that you won't be willing to sell your items for ANY price, it's just that your willingness to sell is higher than your willingness to buy.
^{the below has been split into two}
Hey Professor, appreciate the AMA. A couple of questions: 1) Just from my own thoughts banging around in my head and observations I've made during the pandemic, do you see the pause our society went through and the economic downturn effecting the psychology behind materialism? It seems the American "push for more no matter what" mind state took a eating and I think I'm seeing some consequences of that.	1) It's possible, but my pretty strong prediction is that within 1-2 years of the pandemic ending, we will be back to where we were beforehand in terms of materialism and general behavior. Extreme events like a pandemic seem like they are life changers. For some, that's true (e.g. someone loses a loved one), but for most it's not. We are inherently myopic and think that the thing in front of our noses is the only thing that exists.
2) I'm a current medical student and we get inundated with so many studies that it's overwhelming. Trying to practice evidence based medicine is really hard in an atmosphere that prioritizes publishing with little regard to quality. Do you ha e ways of navigating that I could apply to my day to day? Thanks again.	2) I can't speak to medical research, but that problem exists in all academic fields. The best thing to do is to let science happen. There will always be flashy new findings, but the ones that really matter will get replicated over and over again...and will get built on. The BS ones tend to just die out. That's not a full proof approach to vetting research, but it's better than just assuming everything you see published is true and/or important.
I am a former CMU student. How do you feel about CMU's decision to appoint Richard Grenell as a senior fellow? And how can we do something to fight against it because it seems they are not listening the current student body? Recently, the fence was vandalized against BLM (they wrote "all lives matter" over the previously written "black lives matter"). How are you working to build a more inclusive community at CMU and to fight for those who need it? How can former students help?	I signed the petition to revoke his appointment and stand by that completely. I do understand why the university is upholding it, but I am embarrassed to have him associated with CMU.
	As for the fence, the CMU Provost sent a really great letter immediately after it all happened condemning the vandalism and supporting BLM. Personally, I try VERY hard to do things like call on students of all races and genders and not let white men (of which I am one, btw) dominate conversations. I try to make sure that examples I use to highlight ideas include more than just typically white and/or male oriented products. I have been trained in Green Dot deescalation for sexual assault and violence. I am on the university academic disciplinary committee and have direct say over infractions like harassment or discrimination. And I sit on my college's Faculty Diversity Equity and Inclusion committee with the hope of including representation and inclusion of URM and female faculty. I care about this topic a LOT and do what I can...still probably not enough.
	As for alums, if you see behavior at CMU that you think is antithetical to inclusiveness, let the administration know. Get your fellow alums to weigh in. The university wants your sweet sweet alumni donations. If you are all pissed off, they'll reply.
Hey Professor! I absolutely love to give. But I feel so awkward being thanked. And I dont really like receiving gifts. What would the psychology behind that be?	Great question. It's hard to know without more detail, but I'd guess that some of that anxiety is about attention...as in, your lack of desire for it. As for not liking receiving gifts, maybe you have just not received that many good gifts? Again, it's really hard to say without knowing a bit more about you and the gift giving contexts you're involved in. If you want to share more, I can try to answer better, but totally understandable if you don't!
^{the below is a reply to the above}
Well, if I think more deeply....whenever I need something, I feel like it's up to me to make me happy. I usually don't really ask anyone else. Whether I need a massage, have a getaway, or get my dream dog, I just do it myself.	As an aside, self-gifts are great! You get what you need, and nothing else. No issues there.
	To your question, though, I do wonder if you just haven't receive that many great gifts. Yes, gifts can fall flat and the recipient might not love them, but when they hit, they not only provide the value from the gift itself (e.g. a great bottle of wine) but ALSO the sentimental value from the associations that the gift brings up (e.g. who gave it to you and under what circumstances...like for a birthday or graduation).
Hi Jeff, I have a job application at a place where they do conjoint analysis, something I have never done before. Got any tips? Do you have any thoughts on the technique in general? Personally as someone who takes surveys I find it very abstract (e.g. "Would you rather buy a $5 toaster with two slots vs. a $20 toaster that takes bagels?" I don't know!).	First, good luck with the job application! Conjoint is a really useful tool when used correctly (like any tool, I suppose). The short version is that it lets you extract utility weights for different dimensions (e.g. price, product size, product speed, etc...) without directly asking people to answer questions about those dimensions. So instead of saying "how important is price to you?" you would come up with product profiles that have varying price (among other things) and then have people choose between those profiles. You can then extract, using nothing more than regression analysis (though, practically, no one does it that way...they use software like Sawtooth or SPSS Conjoint), how important those dimensions are for any given person.
	the technique is tedious in that respondents have to make LOTS of pair-wise comparisons, but the end product can teach you a lot about what people actually value.
	One key is to make the task as simple and realistic as possible. So the example you gave is confusing and wouldn't work too well. But I asked you to choose between a $20 toaster with 2 slots vs. a $30 toaster with 3 slots" that would work (in reality it would be more complex than that). You'd be forced to tell me if you prefer a cheaper toaster with fewer slots or a more expensive one with more slots. There's not right answer, but I would learn about those two dimensions for you. I'd need a lot more pair-wise tradeoffs to do this right, but that's the general idea.
Do you find that there are significant differences between particular groups? Does age influence gift giving habits more then sex, or some other factor? Just curious about the general trends of gift giving between groups. Super general question I know, so feel free to just call me out on it	Definitely difference across genders as you would expect. More jewelry given by men to women. More gadgets given by women to men. Not so much in terms of age, though I've never really directly looked at that. The reality is that most gifts aren't that exciting. They tend to be things that are popular in a given year or old standbys like gift cards and ties. There certainly are amazing gifts and gift givers out there, but the vast majority of actual gifts given are pretty mundane. But that's not a bad thing if the recipient still likes what they get!
^{the below is a reply to the above}
Yeah, sounds about right. And yeah if everyone is chipper it's all good :) Is there a sort of gift quality vs quantity data? Like is it better to get more frequent smaller gifts or largemore expensive gifts less frequently?	Smaller more frequent gifts every time. I have some new work on obligatory vs. non-obligatory gifts. Basically, you can make someone very happy by giving a small gift on a random Tuesday compared to a much nicer gift on their Birthday. More random-tuesday gifts every time!
^{the below is a reply to the above}
Thank you! :) will the results of that be on ur channel?	Probably not. The channel isn't about my research, but rather about how to understand data more broadly. But the results will hopefully be published soon!
How extensive are the consumer psychology divisions in companies like apple?	Lots of variation. Places like apple, google, amazon will have a lot of depth in terms of psychologist and consumer behavior researchers. But those are the gold standard. Most will rely on consultants to help out
How does education on finance and economics affect consumer behavior? Does knowing the way our brains make consumer decisions or how businesses try to get you to buy change how you shop?	If you understand better how firms are trying to entice you to buy their products, you can absolutely counteract that better. For instance, $1.99 is really just $2...we all get that. But it turns out, having a 9-ending price really drives demand. That's nuts, but it does. IF you understand that, you stand a shot and not being duped by something so trivial. So educating yourself can be a big help. On finance and econ eduction, also really helpful, but in other ways. When you go to get a 30-year mortgage for your home, understanding how interest rates work, how inflation might affect home prices, how amortization tables work, etc... will help you make a much more informed decision about what is right for you.
hi! how do you predict consumer happiness/decision making etc during unprecedented times like this, when such a scenario may not have taken place before and you do not have much data to go on? also since the research you do and the data you collect are relevant to sales, do you see advertisements being affected by the pandemic in the long run from any changes in consumer mindset?	It's really hard to predict much of anything right now. There are some basic behaviors and experiences that we can expect during a pandemic (e.g. increased anxiety, defaulting to familiar experiences, increased online shopping), but the reality is you're right...we just don't know. There's virtually no data on pandemic psychology/behavior, and all the pop-science stuff you read is just guessing at what will happen.
	As for advertising, I think that once the pandemic is over, life will be back to what it was beforehand in almost every respect. People are amazing to adapting to changing circumstances. We are all doing that now with the pandemic and will all do that again when it's over. I don't think that advertising will be any different. Give it a year after we're all vaccinated (or whatever winds up being the solution) and most people will largely forget that we even had a pandemic. Yes, some will have big changes like lost loved ones or lost jobs, but for most people, life will return to what it was before Covid hit.
^{the below is a reply to the above}
thank you for answering, that is very interesting! the data you collect seems to be applicable to so many different fields. i asked about advertising as a student interested in media, but i can see it being useful in various types of companies be it internet security, food, travel etc. your job sounds really cool and i will definitely check out your YouTube channel :)	Thanks!
Did you ever get to meet Herbert Simon? Wasn't he interested in similar things?	I wish! I've been at CMU for 11 years. Simon passed away in 2001, so I missed him by a few years.
	And yes, Simon was one of the original researchers into what's known as Bounded Rationality, it's the idea that humans don't act like computers and process all information simultaneously, but rather use heuristics and shortcuts to accomplish most tasks.
How influential was the work of Daniel Kahnemann to your current teaching?	VERY! I don't know Danny personally, but my advisor got his PhD at Princeton when Danny was there, so lots of indirect influence that way. More generally, the field of decision making was build on his (and others) work, so hard not to be influenced.
Do you have any opinions on investors behavior during covid 19? More specifically how certain financial firms may have targeted people who have or would dabble in market that have recently lost work due to the pandemic?	Caveat: I am not a finance professor. That said, my read is that fear of missing out (FOMO) is driving a lot of unexpected behaviors. The market has rallied like crazy since the March low and everyone wants in on that. It's hard to sit by and watch others make a killing while you don't.
	As for practices like getting people who don't typically to invest to do so, there's two sides to this. On the one hand, getting more people involved with investing is a great thing. It used to be only that the very wealthy could invest and reap the benefits of the market, but now with places like Robinhood and fee-free trading on Schwab and the like, everyone can participate. On the other hand, MANY people don't understand risk well at all. They just see the possible upside and ignore the possibility of losing a lot (see that guy that committed suicide b/c of a terrible options trade...that's horrible). So firms and gov't have a responsibility to both educate investors and provide safeguards against uninformed behaviors.
^{the below is a reply to the above}
Hello, I just want to specify something in your comment! The young college student who committed suicide did so because a misprogrammed number on the trading site, Robinhood. Of course at the time he did not know it, but the value loss that was near $800,000, was showing the loss of the entire option, not his equity in the option, which was -$1,000 - -$2,000 if I remember right. It was Robinhood's terrible interface, not his misunderstanding of risk, which is horrible. If you would like a misunderstanding of risk on trading platforms, look no further than wallstreetbets, of course as you said FOMO is a huge factor, or if you're interested, some trading platforms intentionally advertise to consumers without properly representing risk. Thank you very much for this AMA, it has been quite insightful!	Thanks so much for that clarification!
I have a question re: dating sites / apps. Is there a way to structure incentives so that the company is motivated to find good pairings between users? It feels like Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, etc. don't have such an incentive currently	I think they do have an incentive to make good pairings. Word of mouth is their strongest asset so having good matches is key. The challenge is that good matches are hard to come by and not everyone agrees on what good is. Is good marriage? Is it a fun night? Not clear.
Hello Professor and thank you for taking this time. As a professional that works in marketing and a person who suffers from mental illnesses, it is often disheartening for me to see so much valuable research and findings be easily made available for use by companies for marketing and consumer exploitation while it is so difficult for those who are struggling to find information that could be beneficial to living their lives more freely. What are your thoughts on this, and do you think there are ways we could change the system to better benefit individuals needs directly?	The connection between marketing academia, marketing industry, and consumers just sucks. No one outside of academia reads marketing academic journals. Few in academia care if their work has applications (even in an applied field like marketing). And consumers can't be bothered (rightfully) to read through academic work to learn.
	Some solutions that I've seen that work: - Marketing Science Institute: this is an organization whose entire goal is link academia and practice. They have conferences where they invite folks from both sides to collaborate. More of this please! - Pop-science social science books like Freakonomics, Blink, Predictably Irrational, etc...: They all have plenty of shortcomings, but the authors all do an amazing job of conveying the ideas of academia to the public. I think that's fantastic. More of this too please! - Consulting for non-profits. I do this and many others do as well. We use our knowledge to help non-profits do their amazing work. This is a way to avoid that "exploitation" you mentioned and instead use what we know to help others. There's not much money in this kind of consulting, which is why few do it, but it's really important. Maybe some kind of granting agency could earmark money for non-profits to hire academic consultants to help them use what we know to help the world. That would be awesome
hey, I'm a recent advertisement graduate, it's good to see someone from such a familiar field here anyways, when I do groceries, I always follow the list to a T, and I take no time at all getting the items, basically, I go against every little trick supermarkets have to "seduce" the customer, so my question is: what makes someone a "good customer"? is it someone highly susceptible to the marketing tricks at the market or someone who spends both their money and time more efficiently?	Good can mean different things here. You sound like you're probably super loyal to products. That's pretty great for most companies. The fact that you don't succumb to unintended purchases definitely makes you less attractive in one capacity, but your predictability makes you very attractive in other ways. If I could run a company where every customer always bought the same thing every week, I would LOVE that. I would know how to schedule raw material purchases, delivery schedules, etc... I would have a steady and dependable income. If, however, I relied just on getting lucky and catching the eye of customers as they passed my products on store shelves, that would be a whole lot more difficult a business plan to execute.
Hi Jeff, I have always geared my life towards maxing out the benefits and deducting the losses for example leaving my family in order to search for better life oportunities, ditching jobs where I felt safe in favor of new and more promising ones. And by this logic I have reached quIte far in my life. But at the end achieving all this goals don't yields the expected satisfaction. However I'm pretty sure that don't doing this would be even worse. Why does it seems that no matter if the desitions taken are the best at my point of view it still seems like I need more than the goals I have achieved. Why is disatisfaction the expected result?	Wow, that's a lot to give up for goals! People are inherently likely to make what are known as upward comparisons. We don't look at the people who we have done better than, but instead focus on the few who done better than us. The classic example is Silver Olympic medalists. They should be elated, but instead they just covet the Gold medalist.
	Beyond that, in your specific case, it's hard to say for sure, but we know that close relationships are the number one driver of life satisfaction. If you've given those all up in pursuit of some other goal, that might explain things a bit. Take that with a grain of salt as all I know about you is summed up in 100 words or so!
Hello Jeff, glad to see this AMA here! I'm a statistics student in Brazil (one of my professors got his doctorate degree at Carnegie Mellon University, in fact!). Much of what we learn nowadays is related to careers pertaining the finance fields. Other stuff includes academic research mixed with other fields. I see myself as a data analyst for a big bank someday, but I always think: is there any career for a data scientist thats underrated by modern standards but still awesome and rewarding, in your opinion?	Go work for a non-profit! It's now where the money is, but many need help from data scientists. You can actually change the world that way!
Which US dollar bill is your favorite?	Cash? You still use cash?
^{the below is a reply to the above}
For coke yeah	Oh, in that case.... Nope, not replying and losing my tenure :)
^{the below is a reply to the above}
Prof, you have a bias. OP mean Coca Cola.	I don't drink soda either :)

Was it mean to ask covid positive roommate to temporarily move out?

Is it okay to ask my roommate to temporarily move out since she tested positive for covid?

Offseason Review Series: Jacksonville Jaguars

Before anything, I just want to preface by saying that I am filling in some huge shoes by following the legendary u/JaguarGator9. I am NOT a typical writer nor do I have any experience in analysis, I just wanted to take a stab at analyzing and writing about my favorite team that has been terrorizing my happiness for 15+ years. So, apologies in advance if there are some incorrect points made.
Also gotta give a shoutout to u/PlatypusOfDeath for continuing to run this series and for the formatting help! Also a thanks to u/flounder19 for directing me towards the thread where half of the info comes from and my bro u/MikeFanto4 for giving me the positive reinforcement through the writing of this. With that being said, hope y'all enjoy!

Jacksonville Jaguars

AFCS

2019 Record: 6-10 (4th in Division)

Coaching Changes

Fires:

Tom Coughlin – VP of Football Operations/Dictator: This will be discussed in the news section. Please hold.
Jon DeFilippo – Offensive Coordinator: It never really occurred to me until recently (give me a break Jags fans), that the firing of Flip was most likely directly related to Foles (even more so once he got hired by Chicago as QB coach). Once Foles was gone, Flip wanted out and they ultimately “mutually agreed to part ways”. While according to fans it would’ve been nice to see the other coordinator go, it shows that the front office “admitted” their mistake and decided to move on from the experiment.
Scott Milanovich – QB Coach: Milanovich took a job as the HC of the Edmonton Eskimos in the CFL. Before his 3-year stint in Jacksonville, he was the HC of the Toronto Argonauts in the CFL where he won the Grey Cup in 2012 and was also named Coach of the Year.

Hires:

Jay Gruden – Offensive Coordinator – The once HC of the Washington Football Team, Gruden comes into the organization bringing experience in molding younger quarterbacks. A big help is the fact that GM Dave Caldwell brought in a few players familiar with his scheme to assist in adjusting the other players to the playbook. Of all the OC candidates, Gruden is best fit for Minshew’s playstyle due to his West Coast Offense.
Ben McAdoo – Quarterbacks Coach: Brought in to replace Milanovich, McAdoo also brings HC experience to the team. Even though his time in the Giants organization is best left to be forgotten, his experience as an OC and QB coach makes him a prime candidate. He spent two seasons in Green Bay working with Aaron Rodgers and also helped the Giants to the 6th best scoring offense in the NFL in 2015.
Denard Robinson – Offensive Quality Control Coach: Not really a huge hire, but a nice reunion. Former QB turned RB, Denard “Shoelace” Robinson, continues his time in Duval as an assistant. He was drafted in the 5th round of the 2013 draft as an “Offensive Weapon” but played primarily at RB during his time as a player.

Free Agency/Trades

Players Lost/Traded

Player	Position	New Team	Compensation
Nick Foles	QB	Bears	Compensatory 4th round draft pick
Calais Campbell	DE	Ravens	5th round pick
A.J. Bouye	CB	Broncos	4th round pick
Marcell Dareus	DT	Free Agent
Marqise Lee	WR	Patriots	1 yr / $1,047,500
Jake Ryan	ILB	Free Agent
Cedric Ogbuehi	RT	Seahawks	1 yr / $2,300,000

Key Losses:

Nick Foles: After signing him to a MASSIVE 4-year contract worth $88 million, with $51 million guaranteed, the Jaguars thought they had their man in Super Bowl MVP Big Dick Nick. However, that did not live long since Foles broke his left clavicle during a 35-yard touchdown pass to DJ Chark. Once he was replaced by Bomb-Chuckin’ and Mom-Fuckin’ Gardner Minshew II, he was basically left as an afterthought in the Jaguars fanbase…..until the bye week. He was named the starter for the rest of the season and was severely disappointing in his limited time as it, thus resulting in him being benched after 3 games. In his time as a starter, he completed 77 passes for a completion percentage of 65.8%, 3 touchdowns and 2 interceptions, with a passer rating of 84.6. He was largely disappointing in his time here but left the door open for Minshew Mania. Foles was traded to the Bears for a 2020 Compensatory 4th round pick AND took parts of his massive contract and helped us start the return from cap hell. D+ for his play, B for the trade return.
Calais Campbell: I’m like, really upset about this one. I remember exactly where I was when I found out that this glorious human was traded to the Baltimore Ravens for a 5th round pick. Chump change for the 2019 Walter Payton Man of the Year award recipient. After being signed to a 4-year deal worth $60 million with $30 million guaranteed in 2017, the man proceeded to become the Mayor of the Defensive Line Formerly Known as Sacksonville. Amassing 31.5 sacks, 77 QB hits and 44 TFL in his 3 years on the team; not only was he a force on the field, he was very much involved in the Phoenix and Jacksonville communities. In 2019, Campbell won the Walter Payton Man of the Year award – given to the NFL player that best demonstrates outstanding community service and excellence on the field. His charity, CRC Foundation, has been helping young people with critical life skills since 2009. Adding to that, he has also hosted many holiday shopping sprees, the JaxPAL Youth Football and STEM Camp and has spent countless hours speaking encouragement to children in area schools. The fact that the Jaguars let him go for a 2020 5th round pick says a lot about what the teams feels about their cap situation. A for play, D- for trade return.
A.J. Bouye: Bouye was signed in 2017 as a free agent from Houston. His final season on the Texans is what attracted the Jaguars the most, landing him a 5-year contract worth $67.5 million with $26 million guaranteed. In his time with the team, he accrued 8 interceptions, 34 passes defended, and allowed just a 64.4 completion percentage when thrown to since 2018. 2017 was by far his best season opposite Jalen Ramsey in which they formed one of the most feared duos that year. He saw significant drop off in the 2 years to follow, leading to the team wanting to move in a different direction. He was traded to the Denver Broncos for a 2020 4th round pick and saving over $11 million from his remaining contract. B for play, C+ for trade return.
Marcell Dareus: Dareus was traded from the Bills to the Jaguars mid-season 2017 for a 2018 6th round pick to help solidify the lone run-defense weakness in what was a near impeccable defense. Although his stats don’t show it, (2.5 sacks, 45 combined tackles, 4 TFL and 5 QB hits) when healthy, he was a stud in the run game. The Jaguars ultimately decided not to pick up his 2020-year option and he remains a free agent. A team struggling in the run game could pick him up for cheap and I’m not 100% sure why he hasn’t been signed by a team yet. Dave Caldwell has said he is open to bringing him back on a separate deal, but hasn't acted on it yet. C

Players Signed

Player	Position	Old Team	Length	Salary
Tyler Eifert	TE	Bengals	2 years	$9,500,000
Joe Schobert	ILB	Browns	5 years	$53,750,000
Chris Thompson	RB	The Washington Football Team	1 year	$1,400,000
Al Woods	DT	Seahawks	1 year	$2,500,000
Rashaan Melvin	CB	Lions	1 year	$1,750,000
Mike Glennon	QB	Raiders	1 year	$1,187,500
Rodney Gunter	DE	Cardinals	3 years	$18,000,000
Aaron Lynch	OLB	Bears	1 year	$1,100,000
Cassius Marsh	DE	Cardinals	1 year	$1,047,500
Lerentee McCray	OLB	Jaguars	1 year	$1,047,500
Tyler Shatley	C	Jaguars	1 year	$1,512,500
Keelan Cole	WR	Jaguars	1 year	$3,259,000
Brian Price	DT	Jaguars	2 year	$1,815,000
Yannick Ngakoue	DE	Jaguars	1 year TAG	$17,788,000

Source: Spotrac.com

Notes
Tyler Eifert: Going into the offseason, the biggest hole in an already lackluster offense was the Tight End position. The Jaguars drafted Josh Oliver in the 3rd round of the 2019 draft to help with that, but he went down with a hamstring injury in the preseason and a back injury during the regular season which limited him to 3 games. James O’Shaughnessy was one of Minshew’s favorite targets but went down with an ACL injury early on as well. Tyler Eifert comes in already familiar with Jay Gruden’s offense. The Jaguars are taking a risk in signing Eifert if they expect him to play even close to his 2015 production (52 catches for 615 yards and 13 touchdowns). However, if he stays healthy and can play even half as good, that’s a massive upgrade over what our Tight End group has produced over the past 5+ years. A 2-year contract worth $9.5 million filled with incentives should give Eifert the motivation to stay healthy and contribute immediately. But if he doesn’t produce as expected, the team should be able to release him with little cap hit. C+
Joe Schobert: Schobert from the Cleveland Browns could be considered the teams’ “marquee” free agent, signing a 5-year, $53.75 million contract with $21.5 million guaranteed. He comes into a linebacker corps that hasn’t had a true MLB since Posluszny retired. This addition allows Myles Jack to move to weak side and gives the opportunity for competition at strong side. Schobert gives the Jaguars a leadership type figure in an already incredibly young defense. Since Telvin Smith retired and decided to be stupid (more on that later on) and Poz choosing to hang up the cleats as well, there hasn’t been someone that could command the defense; Jack tried previously but had probably his worst year to date. Schobert solidifying the middle also gives Jack the opportunity to use his athleticism on the outside. Schobert is top 10 in pass coverage, but still needs to improve in the run game (which is something the team has struggled in for years). I feel like this is a boom-or-bust signing, but am cautiously optimistic. B+
Chris Thompson: Leonard Fournette is still this team’s workhorse back. Rumors started spreading that he would be traded prior to the draft, which ultimately fell flat. Just because the Jags are going to rely on Fournette even more, doesn’t mean that Minshew doesn’t need as many weapons as possible. This is another signing that works well with Gruden’s offense since he had played for him in Washington. This also gives Minshew another weapon out of the backfield. On the other hand, this is another signing that is based solely on whether he can stay healthy or not. A one year, prove-it deal worth $1.4 million is smart on the teams end because when healthy, Thompson can still have the capability to make plays. B
Rodney Gunter: A Calais Campbell clone? Probably not, but a man can dream right? The DE from Arizona signed a 3-year deal worth $18 million to pretty much help rotate through his old position, though. He hasn’t really shown much as a pass rusher (11 sacks in 5 years) but will probably be a rotational piece mostly used in run downs. C
Rashaan Melvin: With the departure of Bouye, the team looked thin at the position prior to the draft. The Jags also hit a homerun with their previous CB signing from Detroit, DJ Hayden. Melvin comes in on another one-year deal to compete with last years UDFA surprise, Tre Herndon for the CB2 spot opposite CJ Henderson. In his 4 years with Detroit, Oakland and Indianapolis, he posted 4 INT and 41 Passes Defended and 2 FF. This puts some competition in camp (if there is one) with experience vs. potential. B-
Al Woods: Caldwell goes in again on defense and signs the large run-stuffer from Seattle on a 1-year, $2.5 million deal. The loss of Marcel Dareus put a large hole in the already weak run defense and Woods helps plug it back in with a decent resume stuffing the middle. This gives the Jags a nice rotation between him, Abry Jones and Davon Hamilton. B EDIT: As of posting this, Al Woods has opted out of the 2020 season.

Draft

After trading away Jalen Ramsey, Calais Campbell, AJ Bouye and Nick Foles, the Jaguars ended up with a total of 12 draft picks (most in franchise history).

Round	Number	Player	Position	School
1	9 (9)	CJ Henderson	CB	Florida
1	20 (20) from Rams	K’Lavon Chaisson	DE/LB	LSU
2	10 (42)	Laviska Shenault Jr.	WR	Colorado
3	9 (73)	DaVon Hamilton	DT	Ohio State
4	10 (116)	Ben Bartch	OL	St. Johns (Minn.)
4	31 (137) from Broncos	Josiah Scott	CB	Michigan State
4	34 (140) from Bears	Shaquille Quarterman	LB	Miami
5	12 (157) from Ravens	Daniel Thomas	S	Auburn
5	20 (165) from Rams (Fowler trade)	Collin Johnson	WR	Texas
6	10 (189)	Jake Luton	QB	Oregon State
6	27 (206)	Tyler Davis	TE	Georgia Tech
7	9 (223)	Chris Claybrooks	CB/Return Specialist	Memphis

Analysis

C.J. Henderson: There was a lot of speculation as to who Caldwell was going to draft with the first of 2 first round picks. Was it going to be an OL? WR? QB?(for some reason). Dave ultimately went with the heir to the Ramsey throne. Gone are the days of back injuries and in are the days of another Florida school product. This man is 6-foot 204lb and is extremely good in coverage, which is something that the team needs in replacement of Ramsey. One glaring weakness in his game is his tackling, which seems like there is some hesitation and looks to often miss open field tackles. He immediately fills the CB1 role that was previously held by surprise UDFA Tre Herndon. B
K’Lavon Chaisson: Alright, I’ll address the elephant on the team now. Yannick Ngakoue is not playing another down for the Jacksonville Jaguars. I was a believer that they could strike a long-term deal and keep the talented pass rusher but NOOOOO, he just had to beef with the owner’s son and ruin any chance, but I digress. The first of the Rams 1st round picks from the Jalen Ramsey trade yields the replacement for the other man who really wants out. The LSU product brings an incredible motor and raw talent. He has all the physical tools you could need in a DE/LB at 6’3” and 254lbs but has a high ceiling if he works on his technique. A line edged by Josh Allen and K’Lavon Chaisson sounds relentless to me. A-
Laviska Shenault Jr.: There was plenty of WR talent deep in this draft class and I feel like the Jags found a secret weapon in the Colorado prospect. Despite dealing with numerous injuries and not the best quarterback play, he was still able to produce over 2000 scrimmage yards through his SO and JR seasons. If he can stay healthy, he’ll be able to line up all over the field. Gruden will be able to set him up at WR, RB and even Wildcat QB if he’s feeling frisky. At 6-2 220LB, Minshew has versatile target that has the chance to produce really well if he can stay healthy. B+
DaVon Hamilton: The 6-4, 320lb DT was a wall in the center of the Buckeye line. He amassed 6 sacks, 28 tackles (9.5 for a loss) with 1 forced fumble in his redshirt senior season. Hamilton was drafted to help shore up the middle once held up by Dareus, but also now partially manned by Al Woods. His specialty is in the run game, which is something the Jags desperately need. B
Ben Bartch: The Smoothie King comes to Duval. Everyone knows the story of Bartch’s insane smoothie recipe that helped him gain 86lbs. Coming out of DIII St. John’s in Minnesota, he dominated competition enough to earn him a spot at the Senior Bowl. Even though he doesn’t have much experience against NFL caliber competition, Bartch has the tools necessary to grow in the league and become a serviceable backup or eventually challenge current starting RG, AJ Cann. B-
Josiah Scott: On the smaller end of the spectrum (5’9”, 185lbs), Scott has had to overcome his size with speed and knowledge. He’s too small to be anything more than a slot corner; but he can be great depth behind DJ Hayden and helpful in the run game. The Jags lost a lot in the CB department, so I understand the depth pick. C+
Shaquille Quarterman: Quarterman was a 4-year starter and a captain while at Miami. Caldwell really wanted to shore up the run defense this offense and this pick doesn’t stray away from that narrative. He may not be the best in the pass game since he has limited speed, but on running downs he could be very helpful and a leader in the locker room. B
Daniel Thomas: I’m actually a fan of this pick solely for depth purposes. The best backup safety on the team is Andrew Wingard, so any help at the position is good. In his time at Auburn, he notched 5 interceptions, 199 total tackles and forced 3 fumbles. B
Collin Johnson: I feel like Johnson will be an asset in the red zone. His large stature at 6’6”, 220lbs+ will be great for jump-balls. The Jags receiving corp. has almost every kind of receiver you would need except for a big bodied guy to get up after 50/50 balls. While I’m not happy it took Dave this long to get more help for Minshew besides Shenault, this isn’t the worst consolation prize. C+
Jake Luton: Caldwell has had a history of selecting a QB in the 6th round. So, I’m not surprised by this pick. But the question is: will he be another Minshew, or a Tanner Lee? The Oregon State Beaver threw for 42 touchdowns to 11 interception in 3 years there. My money is on him being a camp body or not making the roster at all. D
Tyler Davis: Davis started his career at UConn as a Quarterback but switched to WR as a sophomore and ended up a TE before transferring to Georgia Tech as a TE. His receiving stats leave a lot to be desired but has some strength in run-blocking. In an already crowded position group, he’ll have to really show off to make the final roster. D+
Chris Claybrooks: Caldwell and Marrone both agreed that Claybrooks was drafted for returning purposes. Supposedly running a 4.25s 40 in a video sent to every NFL team, he has the speed to make a difference on special teams. In his time returning kicks at Memphis, he returned 11 for 338 yards for an average of 30.7 – a much higher average than the 24.2 yds/rt the Jaguars did in 2019. B+

UDFA

Luq Barcoo, CB, San Diego State; Doug Costin, DT, Miami (OH); Nathan Cottrell, RB, Georgia Tech; Ben Ellefson, TE, North Dakota State; Nate Evans, LB, Central Florida; Tavien Feaster, RB, South Carolina; Josh Hammond, WR, Florida; Amari Henderson, CB, Wake Forest; Ross Matiscik, LS, Baylor; Steven Nielson, OL, Ohio; J.R. Reed, S, Georgia; James Robinson, RB, Illinois State; Marvelle Ross, WR, Notre Dame College; Connor Slomka, FB, Army; Tre’Vour Wallace-Simms, OL, Missouri; Kobe Williams, CB, Arizona State; Brandon Wright, K, Georgia State.

Other Offseason News that Affected the Team

Oh my word…..there was so much that happened. I wish I had enough time to go into full detail on everything, but new job has my time extremely limited. I’ll unfortunately have to stick with short synopses on these.

Tom Coughlin Fired
The Tom Coughlin era 2.0 is finally over. The Jaguars have had enough of his dictatorship and days after the NFLPA sent a warning letter to players to stay away, they relieved him of his duties. A few of the grievances included:

Fining Dante Fowler Jr. $700k for not rehabbing in Jacksonville
Nearly forcing Jalen Ramsey and Telvin Smith to participate in voluntary workouts
Fining Fournette for sitting while inactive during the 2018 finale

But wait! There’s more! Not only did he have a number of grievances filed against him, he:

Gave Blake Bortles a deal averaging $18m a year, only to be released
Signed Nick Foles to a deal worth $88m, and wouldn’t let it go when it was proven he wasn’t the guy
Other general day-to-day nuances that make him an overall unlikable person

Now that he’s gone, the clocks have gone back to normal time and hopefully the morale of the team improves greatly. This is also a final chance for Doug Marrone and Dave Caldwell to show that a major factor in the teams lack of recent success can be directly attributed to the Tom Coughlin culture.

Telvin Smith arrested
Oooooh boy……what to say about this one. Former 5th round pick out of Florida State turned top MLB in the NFL arrested and charged with unlawful sexual activity with a minor. He retired in 2019 stating that he needed to focus on his family and health. Smith first met the girl in the summer of 2019, recently after she turned 17; and in their 2-month time together, they had sex multiple times in Smith’s car and home. Adding onto that, Smith offered the underage girl $200 to keep quiet, $100 of which she ultimately took. He was released on $50,003 bond. DON’T.FUCK.KIDS.OR.TEENS.PEOPLE.

Yannick Ngakoue
I don’t really know where to start this since so much has happened. Yannick Ngakoue is trying to pull a Jalen Ramsey and tweet himself out of Duval County. Ngakoue has been (and still is) very open about his displeasure towards the organization. Since late 2019, he has tweeted numerous times about wanting to be traded, even calling out Tony Khan (son of owner Shahid Khan) on the site. The team franchise tagged him and tried shopping around. Their asking price was a MINIMUM of a first round pick, but the Twitter tirade ruined basically any chance of that return. There was an offer that included a Pro Bowl player recently, which was declined since the player “didn’t fit their system”. People are split between whether he plays if he doesn’t get traded or sitting out the season, which I guess we’ll see once (if) the season commences.

No 5th year option for Fournette
Just like Ngakoue, the former 4th overall picks’ relationship with the front office has not been the most ideal. He was one of the many players that filed a grievance against the team for the fine for sitting on the bench in 2018 while inactive, which he got back. The Jaguars decided not to pick up his 5th year option, which would’ve netted Fournette $8.43 million. This means that, unless an extension is made, he will be an unrestricted free agent in 2021. The team will most likely not extend him beyond this season since they were even trying to get rid of him this offseason. They had discussions with teams about moving him, but no deal was done. Caldwell ultimately decided that Fournette will stick around and be the RB1 for the 2020 season but has not made any mention of beyond that. This is a contract year for him, and he wants to prove that he was worth the 4th overall selection.

COVID-19
As most of you may know, the Jacksonville Jaguars have another name: The London Jaguars
But in all seriousness, it’s been seeming to the general public that the team will move to London; especially after this year when Khan moved a second home game to Wembley Stadium. The reasoning behind the move is to increase local revenue. The front office believed that the reasoning behind the low revenue was the local market, not the product on the field. No one, not a single fan took this piece of news positively. It seemed like it was doomed from the start, something that could only be slowed down by say a…..pandemic? (un)Luckily so, one such pandemic happened. Creating an international travel restriction and preventing any NFL teams from playing in London. When the season does start, the home games, which would’ve been vs. the Lions and Browns in non-consecutive weeks, will actually be played at home. In other COVID news, former Jaguar great Tony Boselli contracted the Coronavirus and was admitted to the ICU for five days. Things got so bad that he was hooked up to two IVs and needed oxygen to help his breathing. Luckily, he was able to recover mostly and was released on March 30.

Projected Starting Lineup with Camp Battles

Positions won in a camp battle italicized
QB- Gardner Minshew: This is Gardner Minshew’s team in 2020. After a promising rookie season, added weapons and a more workable scheme, Minshew should solidify himself as the quarterback of the future - given he slows down on the turnovers.
RB- Leonard Fournette: In a contract year after his 5th year option was declined, he will be running with a chip on his shoulder. The team looks to run him as much as possible before he leaves.
TE- Tyler Eifert, James O’Shaughnessy: Free agent signing Eifert will fill the starting role as long as he is healthy. I think O’Shaughnessy beats out Josh Oliver for the TE2 spot due to last years chemistry with Minshew.
WR- D.J. Chark Jr., Dede Westbrook, Chris Conley, Laviska Shenault Jr.: This group is easily the strength of this offense. Chark looks to build on a really nice 2019 season, Westbrook and Conley weren’t bad as WR2 and 3, but they weren’t spectacular either. I added Shenault as well because he will be put in at a bunch of different positions.
LT- Cam Robinson: Robinson battled through an ACL injury in 2018 which basically sent his development back over a year. He’s been inconsistent in his time playing, playing well during some games but slacking big time in others.
LG- Andrew Norwell: The coaching staff is still sticking by the second highest paid guard in the NFL, even though he hasn’t been playing like it at all. He missed time in 2018 with a foot injury and has been battling through that since. But ultimately needs to play even remotely like the former 1st team all-pro in order to provide some return on his contract. He has been arguably the worst lineman on an already weak line.
C- Brandon Linder: One of the more underrated lineman in the league. Linder has been a consistent leader on the offense since being drafted in the 3rd round in 2014.
RG- A.J. Cann: Cann is just one of those guys where you kinda forget about him until he has a terrible game and then you remember that he’s actually not good. I’m considering this one a battle because I feel like rookie Bartch can snag a start or two during the season.
RT- Jawaan Taylor: After dropping to the Jags in the second round of last years’ draft, Taylor has lived up to expectations. While having the typical rookie growing pains, he was extremely solid playing against pro-level talent.
DL- Josh Allen, Abry Jones, Taven Bryan/Rodney Gunter, K’Lavon Chaisson: A group that is primed to surprise people. The Good Josh Allen is already a forced to be reckoned with, Abry Jones is a solid piece with some rotational help, Taven Bryan is only getting better at the run while Gunter will help with the pass rush. Finally, 1st round pick K’Lavon Chaisson comes in with an incredible motor to help with the loss of Ngakoue.
LB- Myles Jack, Joe Schobert, Quincy Williams: Myles Jack is on his 3rd position, so hopefully this will unlock his full athletic potential. Schobert will command the defense up the middle and drop into coverage. Quincy did not play well last year as a rookie. I hope he is able to progress this season or we might be in trouble there.
CB- C.J. Henderson, Rashaan Melvin, D.J. Hayden: 9th overall pick Henderson gets the start at the CB1 position. Melvin and Tre Herndon are going to be battling for the CB2 spot, but I give the nod to Melvin solely because he has more experience. D.J. Hayden is another underrated player in the NFL and is quietly one of the top Nickel corners.
S- Ronnie Harrison, Jarrod Wilson: Ronnie Harrison has been really coming into his own over the past season and will only get better. Jarrod Wilson played fairly well in 2019 and was exercised his option during the offseason.
K- Josh Lambo: Lambo is one of the most consistent kickers in the NFL today. Hitting over 94% of his kicks since coming to Jacksonville (while also leading the NFL in 2019 with 97.1% FG made).
P- Logan Cooke: Cooke is top 10 in yards/punt and has no need to worry about losing his job.
KR- Chris Claybrooks: The 7th rounder from Memphis was drafted specifically to return kicks, hopefully he brings the spark that the team desperately needs on ST.
PR- Dede Westbrook: Westbrook was 14th in the NFL in punt returns, he hasn’t been great in the field, but he also hasn’t been terrible.

Schedule Predictions

Week 1: IND (L) – Philip Rivers has had our number over the years (7-2, 24 touchdowns to 5 interceptions); and a team that’s a QB shy from competing now has the Jaguars literal kryptonite. I have my faith in the young defense, but Rivers will probably have a field day. 0-1
Week 2: @TEN (W) – Huh, no annual TNF Titans-Jaguars trash bowl? 2020 is really a weird year and I don’t like it. Here’s hoping that at least one trend sort of-continues: a split in games. The Jags revamped run defense slows down Derrick Henry for a game and CJ Henderson gets his first career pick off of Tannehill. Minshew is going to be the deciding factor in this game. 1-1
Week 3: MIA (W) – If it’s Fitzpatrick, it’s a loss. But I believe Tua takes the job early in the season(maybe?) and has his typical rookie growing pains. One of which is losing to a bad team that you shouldn’t lose to. 2-1
Week 4: @CIN (W) – Just like Tua, Burrow is set to have his growing pains. But this isn’t one of those games. The first overall pick goes into a shootout with The Man, The Myth, The Legend but comes up short due to a questionable play call in the final seconds. 3-1
Week 5: @HOU (L) – Even though Houston no longer has DeAndre Hopkins, Deshaun Watson is still able to work through the Jags D to come up with the win. 3-2
Week 6: DET (L) – Matthew Stafford has a really good week and Jeff Okudah outmatches his top 10 counterpart in another close game that comes down to game management experience. 3-3
Week 7: BYE
Week 8: @LAC (W) – Even though Jacksonville isn’t typically good on the west coast, they’re facing a team manned either by Tyrod Taylor or Justin Herbert. If they’re facing the latter (I’m sticking with a first round rookie start), then they’ll pull off a win they shouldn’t have. 4-3
Week 9: HOU (L) - Just like week 5, Watson goes off again while Brandon Cooks has 150+ yards receiving. Minshew attempts a 4th quarter comeback and brings it close, but ultimately falls short. 4-4
Week 10: @GB (L) - Aaron Rodgers is obviously unhappy with the drafting of Jordan Love and is on a mission to prove that he’s still got it in the league. Even though the rest of the roster is lacking pieces, you can never count out Rodgers. Especially when it’s against lower competition. 4-5
Week 11: PIT (L) – I feel like this could be the start (or continuation) of a decent non-divisional/former divisional rivalry. Big Ben is back and has a good back in James Conner. Besides JuJu Smith-Schuster and Eric Ebron, there isn’t anyone that inflicts fear in secondaries. This game could go either way, but I’m giving the nod to Pittsburgh in a close match. Their defense has enough to slow down our offense, but our defense lacks the “star-power” against their offense to really make up for it. 4-6
Week 12: @CLE (L) – Chubb is good, Beckham is good, Landry is good, Hooper is good. Unfortunately I don’t see us being close in this one. 4-7
Week 13: @MIN (L) – Minnesota, at this point, is looking towards the postseason and will not hold back. Thielen and Cook will carry their offense to 3 touchdowns while the Jags offense falls flat this week. 4-8
Week 14: TEN (L) – The split game. Again….WHY NO TNF?! The Jaguars come into the game tired and eliminated, while the Tacks come into the contest nearing a berth and are hungry for a win. Derrick Henry is Derrick Henry and just runs train. 4-9
Week 15: @BAL (L) - I may be biased but I’m not delusional. 4-10
Week 16: CHI (W) – I’m basing this off my prediction that Foles will outplay Trubisky and stays healthy. Foles plays better than Trubisky, but that’s not saying much. Henderson is able to keep Allen Robinson at bay; and while Khalil Mack will be effective, his impact will be kept to a best-case scenario. 5-10
Week 17: IND (W) – Indianapolis already clinched a playoff spot and is resting their starters for their inevitable 1st round elimination. So, the Jags will win in semi-convincing fashion against a team starting backups. 6-10
Final Record: 6-10. I genuinely believe this team has improved overall despite the major losses throughout the defense. There are going to be a lot of close games, especially if more players opt-out of the season. I feel like many of these games could steer in either direction. Besides Baltimore, Minnesota, Houston and Green Bay, of course. The ceiling of this team could push .500, but the floor could really bottom out at 1 or 2 wins. This team is extremely young and still needs to mesh. Depending on next years draft picks (looking at you, Rams. Please suck, thanks), this team is poised for a huge jump in the near future. This isn’t a full rebuild, it’s a partial one. I do not see this team making the postseason this year, but they could definitely play party-pooper to a couple of teams.

Schemes

Jay Gruden – Gruden utilizes a West Coast Offensive scheme. This scheme was created by Bill Walsh in the 60’s when he worked for the Cincinnati Bengals as the QB coach. This offense relies heavily on shorter throws spread out throughout the field, eventually opening the top up for the occasional long ball. The use of a mobile QB and a variety of receivers can really help spread out the defense as well and easier for him to make throws.
Todd Wash – Although there have been rumors of a scheme change, and the signing of certain players seem to suggest the same, Todd Wash is still sticking a base 4-3 defense. One of the more common schemes, it involves four down linemen consisting of a nose tackle, a defensive tackle and two ends. Behind the linemen are 3 linebackers: The Mike, Will and Sam linebackers. The Mike, or middle, will line up behind the nose tackle and covers the A gap. The Will, or weak, lines up on the side not containing the TE and covers the B gap on that side. The Sam, or strong, lines up on the side of the Tight End and will contain the C gap on that side. The secondary will always have two CB’s, a SS and FS; the CB’s will cover the receivers, the FS will line up deep on the side of the weakside linebacker and the SS will do the same on the opposite side.
Link to Hub

MUFFINS part 2/ conclusion)

“Thank God for the California governor,” thought Wilroy Jackson as he stretched out on a chair in the back room of the largest sports clothing store on the ground floor plaza. He put his feet up on the desk, taking a drag on a joint. “Yeah, thank you governor and thank you Coronavirus.”
Two months ago, he had been caught lifting merchandise out of a high end department store in a part of the city where protestors were setting businesses on fire and he hit some mother and her child with his car when he tried to escape. It wasn’t his fault, though. If the cops hadn’t been chasing him, he would have been more careful.
Fortunately, bleeding heart Hollywood social justice warrior types had raised enough in criminal defense funds that Jackson was able to hire Lewis Phagas. Phagas was able to get the looting charges against Jackson dropped and all of the more serious homicide charges were reduced to involuntary manslaughter. Yeah, Jackson still had to do a little time, but that was better than doing life. But even that sentence was commuted when the governor of the great state of California released thousands of non-violent offenders back out into the streets for fear of spreading Covid-19. Jackson was loving life. Thank God for social justice warriors.
Jackson’s girlfriend was an assistant manager of this fine purveyor of high class athletic clothing and shoes and she had secreted him into the manager’s office shortly before closing time and had given him her access card. All he’d have to do is to chill out until about nine o’clock when the building was empty, then take the stairs to the first floor where the store’s stock room was the first one on the left. He’d have to be quick to get in. Janice should have left a cart for him there and all he’d have to do is load up the merch and get out of there. The only danger was that the security room was on the other end of the same floor. But, if the guard was actually awake and paying attention, Jackson would be out the back long before some dumb ass, low end, rent-a-cop could stop him.
Chaz was a bleach blonde young man working at the third floor debt collection company. He was relatively new, having only been hired six months ago, but he had already won two monthly cash awards for collecting the most money for two of the six months he’d worked for the Domestic Economic Management Solutions company, or DEMS for short. On his second month with the company, he recovered over $42,000 on dollars and on his fifth month, he had recovered nearly $53,000. Chaz decided to work a little late tonight, as the end of the month was only a week away and he was in the running to win the monthly cash award again from the DEMS. The only way to get ahead in the DEMS employ was to successfully redistribute that wealth, and Chaz was quickly proving that he represented the best that the DEMS had to offer. He was alone in the cubicle city which, during normal business hours, employed hundreds of debt collectors. Rosa and Rita, the young twin Latina cleaning crew girls, came into the large office lugging behind them vacuums and a cleaning cart. Chaz gave them a friendly wave and a big smile.
“Working late again tonight, Senior Chaz?” said Rosa or Rita, Chaz could never tell them apart.
“Of course, ladies,” he said. “Gotta’ make that money!”
He turned his attention back to the computer inside his cubicle, speaking into his headset. “Look, Mr. Wallace. You already told me that your business was set on fire during the peaceful protests and the bank is going to foreclose on your home, but that has nothing to do with me. Your first priority is to pay off your debts. How hard is that to understand?”
While MS-13 was one of the largest, if not the largest Hispanic drug cartels operating in Los Angeles, they were far from the only one. There were others, like the Los Zetas. Carlo hid just inside the stairwell on the second floor, waiting for Manuel to finish cleaning the offices in the law firm. It took Carlo a few weeks to figure it out, but somehow old, innocent, hard working Manuel was employed as a mule for MS-13, dropping off kilos of coke usually at the piers or dockside. Carlo didn’t know where old Manuel was getting his stuff, but he knew that if he could intercept Manuel and take his stuff before he made another drop, Carlo would make a name for himself with the Los Zetas. Carlo peeked around the corner of the stair well, watching Manuel pass the glass door towards the elevator. He’d give Manuel a few minutes to get to the parking garage, then Carlo would follow.
After a few minutes, Carlo opened the door and stepped into the hallway, looking towards the elevators to his right. Suddenly, a loud crash caused him to jerk his head to the left. A tall, pale, elderly white man wearing a tan suit was thrown through the glass doors of the law firm. His body flew across the hallway and slammed against the reinforced windows which overlooked the plaza. The body slumped down on the ground, but to Carlo’s horror the elderly man got to his knees, clutching a hole in his abdomen where his guts used to be. The man reached forwards toward Carlo with bloody hands and pleading eyes before slumping down, unmoving in a puddle of his own gore.
Carlo bit down on his fist, too shocked to move, when something emerged from the law offices. It regarded the dead Phagas lying on the hallway floor then suddenly looked up, noticing Carlo. Carlo gasped, and then turned, running towards the elevator doors. Hearing the thuds of heavy steps looming closely behind him, Carlo ignored the elevators and instead ran down the hallway, taking a quick right and running past the gynecologist office to a set of double doors on the left. Quickly scanning his access card, he threw open the glass doors and ran inside. Praying that running up the stairs instead of down would slow down his massive pursuer, he took the steps two at a time headed to the third floor. His heart sank when he heard the glass shatter behind him and the thudding of footsteps following him upwards.
Rounding a corner which gave him a split second to look down, Carlo screamed. Although the narrow stairwell was only just wide enough for the monstrosity to navigate, it was actually gaining on Carlo as it bounded up the stairs. Carlo scrambled up to the third floor landing, access card in hand and threw open the door. But before he could step through, a crushing weight came down on Carlo, splintering his spine and upper back and pulverizing his heart and lungs. Blood shot out of his mouth and eyes. Carlo’s body kept quivering, long after he had died.
“Rosa! Rita! Whichever one of you is making all that noise, would you please stop? I’m trying to have a convo here!”
The monstrosity turned to the direction of the noise. Sniffing the air, it stalked down a wide hallway towards an open gallery of hundreds of cubicles, completely forgetting the broken form of Carlo. Chaz was seated in one of the cubicles along a long wall made entirely of glass which faced the hallway. His back was to the entrance to the gallery from the hallway and he was talking loudly into his head set and animatedly waving his arms.
“Look, Miss Thomas,” he said sternly. “Again, I heard you that you lost your job due to the pandemic!” Chaz had given up on Mr. Wallace, the deadbeat who blamed his lack of good business skills on the peaceful protestors. Chaz thought it might have been better if Mr. Wallace had burned down along with his business.
“Yes, Miss Thomas,” continued Chaz. “I realize that you are living out of your car, but you have to put your priorities in perspective. If you don’t pay off this debt that you owe, the DEMS will have no choice but to pursue litigation. Look, Miss Thomas, here is my suggestion. You can sell your car, and use the money to quickly pay off your debt! Then with the money that you have left over, you can get your kids something nice to eat at a McDonald’s!”
Chaz was so close to taking the daily lead. Collecting debts was a highly competitive dog-eat-dog game and Chaz played to win. He just needed this bitch to bite. He’d intended this to be his last call of the night and his blood was up for this kill, so much so that Chaz didn’t notice the horrid thing creeping up slowly behind him. “Miss Thomas, I’m trying to put food in your children’s belly but all you’re saying is that you want to force the DEMS into suing you! Is that correct, Miss Thomas? Am I hearing that you want your kids to starve because your priorities are all jacked up?”
Miss Shaquina Thomas, mother of three children aged 2, 3, and 6, where living in their 2002 Mazda Hatchback on a ghetto corner of Kansas City, Missouri. She had been laid off from her job at the IHOP when the pandemic hit and was reduced to working odd jobs here and there. It barely fed the children and put gas in the car, but it was the best she could do for now. Then this person called from the debt collection agency. She tried to explain that she was doing the very best that she could, but the man just wouldn’t listen and she began to cry over the phone. Miss Shaquina Thomas suddenly heard what sounded like a shriek followed by a large crunching noise over the phone before the battery went dead.
Rosa and Rita had just about completed mopping half of the hardwood floors out in the hallway and were returning to the maintenance closet to dump the dirty water and refill their rolling mop buckets with fresh water and pine cleaner. As they passed the gallery of cubicles, they were met with a sight of blood and gore as something which should not exist was feasting on the annoying young white man who always made snide comments to them behind their backs. Either Rosa or Rita screamed, Chaz would never have known which, and the horror looked up. In two bounds it crashed into the glass wall which divided the gallery from the hallway, but the reinforced glass held. Rosa and Rita abandoned their mop buckets and raced down the hallway as the monstrosity launched itself at the cracked glass again.
Turning right at the end of the hallway, Rosa and Rita screamed as they saw the smashed shell of what was left of their co-worker Carlo blocking the stairway going down. They screamed again as they heard the glass partition behind them shatter, followed by thudding feet following close behind. Running halfway down the hallway, Rita stopped at the elevators, frantically pressing the down button. The monstrosity turned the corner just as the elevator doors opened.
Rita pushed Rosa inside the elevator then jumped in herself just as the black monstrosity leapt. Rita was screaming, frantically pushing the ‘door close’ button, but the doors were slow to respond as the thing crouched outside and made to burst into the cramped elevator space. Suddenly, Rosa and Rita each pulled out a small .380 handgun from holsters which were strapped around their ankles underneath their grey work pants and began firing at the horror just outside the doors. As the doors finally started to close, and the elevator began to descend, the twin Mexican cleaning girls yelled at their tormentor, “Los Zetas, bitches!”
Though confused at what had just occurred, as it was not used to prey escaping, the monstrosity sniffed the air around the elevator doors then turned to the stairwell. Once again stomping on poor Carlo’s body as it passed, the unearthly hunter bounded down the steps, eager to catch up to its prey.
Wilroy Jackson checked his watch and, seeing that it was past 9 o’clock, knew that it was time to get the show on the road. Using the pass card that his girlfriend gave him, he opened the door to the back room which led to the private stairs up to the first floor. Once there, he peaked out the window of the door to make sure that the coast was clear. Then he looked up to the ceiling and spotted the surveillance camera. Jackson had dressed all in white. White sweats. White hoodie. White sneakers. White gloves. When he saw that the coast was clear, he put on a white mask and pulled the hoodie over his head. This wasn’t Jackson’s first rodeo, and he knew that it was difficult to identify suspects who dressed head to foot in white, especially with the low resolution camera’s which most security companies used.
In less than three seconds, Jackson was out the stairwell door, turned right, swiped the access card and was inside the treasure room that was storage room of the sporting goods store. As promised, Jessica had left a push cart for him just inside the door which he immediately began to stack with boxes of Air Jordans, Nike Air and Adidas sneakers, each pair of sneakers costing several thousand dollars each. In less than a minute, Jackson had about twenty pairs of sneakers stuffed into the sturdy plastic cart and soon he burst out of the storage room.
Pushing the cart in front of him, Jackson turned left and raced down the hallway. If the security guard was on his game, Jackson figured that he had a one minute head start on the rent-a-cop. At the end of the corridor, he pushed the cart to the right and continued down the adjoining corner running past the maintenance closet, the water meter regulator closet, an electrical room, and another store stock room. He just had to get past the break room and the stairs on the right and reach the service door at the end of the corridor on the left which led to the parking garage.
Once outside, all he’d have to do is take an immediate right and squeeze himself and the cart between a retaining wall and a concrete pillar and push out from behind the bushes surrounding the first level garage area which then led to the side walk with Flower Street on his right. Just up the street, Jessica had parked the van which they had stolen to make their escape south to get on the Christopher Columbus Transcontinental Highway and freedom. Jackson had just passed the break room. The door to the parking garage was just twenty feet to his left when the stairwell doors to his right exploded outwards. Jackson was thrown against the wall opposite along with about $100,000 dollars worth of high end sneakers. He slumped to the ground and, before he could recover from the shock, felt an incredible pain below his waist, accompanied by a loud crunching sound. Confused, Jackson turned over and pulled himself as far along the ground as his arms could take him, wondering why his legs weren’t working. He died not realizing the entire lower half of his body was missing.
The thing bowed its head, nudging the corpse and sniffing. Suddenly, lifting its head, it froze. It took a deep breath then jerked around and raced down in the direction that Jackson had come from. The horror turned the corner and stopped as it began to stalk the corridor past the break room to its left. Near the end of the corridor, the thing saw a door that was propped open by a sliding chair.
“What?” Bradford awoke with a start, momentarily confused as his world was covered by a suffocating filter of haze grey. He reached up and pulled Schmidt’s newspaper away from his face as he stood up abruptly. He looked at the clock on the wall, showing that it was past 9 o’clock. He’d been asleep for over an hour. He cursed, trying to calm himself down. What could have happened in an hour? Bradford sat back down to view the monitors and was horrified at what he saw.
Monitor 19 showed a man’s ripped corpse bloodying the entrance to the second floor parking garage. Monitor 26 showed the disemboweled body of a thin, older man wearing a tan suit sprawled out on the main hallway of the second floor. Monitor 41 showed someone that looked like one of the cleaning crew guys that Bradford saw earlier, crushed and mangled in the stairwell on the third floor, while what looked to be the remains of one of the office workers was lying in the debt collections gallery on Monitor 42.
Bradford stared unbelieving, throat dry, and eyes wide as he continued to scan the monitors. He knew that he had to call for help, but what would he say? His fingers were too frozen to move, anyway. He scanned the first floor monitors, the floor he was on, and saw two young women dressed in cleaning crew uniforms, running out of the parking garage, both pointing handguns behind then as they ran. Panning to monitor 42, Bradford gulped dryly as he saw the gory half eaten body of a young man lying in the hallway surrounded by piles of bloody sneakers.
Wait, that was just around the corner! Oh my God. That means that…
A hot breath enveloped Bradford from behind, followed by the stench of blood and uncooked flesh. Bradford turned on his chair and came face to face with a terrifying beast of nightmares. The thing stood over him, with a mass like that of a bull, only much larger. It stood on four legs, with its muscular front legs standing seven feet high at the muscular shoulders and ending in massive paws at least a foot and a half across. Its shoulders were as wide as its legs, at least seven feet across and it supported a head that seemed almost too big for the rest of its body. The head resembled that of a bulldog, but four feet wide, with a flat snout and a wide nose, but with an oversized mouth that extended as if on unhinged jaws that revealed dagger-like teeth about three inches long. It had two massive horns which protruded from its temples like a bull and they hung over wide spaced eyes which glowed a fiery deep red.
The body tapered towards the rear and ended at a long, muscular tail. The tail itself ended in a spike which seemed as strong as steel which scraped, sparked and gouged as it waved around the room, randomly smacking into objects and the ground.
Bradford leaned so far back in his seat that it almost fell over. Resting his right arm behind him on the desk to steady himself, Bradford raised his left hand up protectively across his face…
… and smacked the monstrous black beast across its fanged muzzle.
The beast yelped in surprise then turned, fleeing towards the far corner of the room with its tail between its legs. Reaching the corner, the beast turned facing Bradford and flopped down on the floor, plopping its massive horned head down and covering it with both of its massive front legs. Its flaming red eyes peered out from underneath its paws, whimpering pitifully.
“Muffins!” yelled Bradford, standing up and pointing an accusing finger at the hellish beast. “What did you do?” The beast yelped again and covered its eyes as Bradford stormed over to it. The beast kicked its rear legs, trying to back its rear end further into the corner, as if trying to make itself as small and inconspicuous as possible. Still hiding its head under its paws, the beast shivered as it panted and licked its mouth.
Bradford stared down at his poor little friend hunkered in the corner, all shaking and confused. He tried to be angry, but how could he be angry at the little girl? She was just a pup, for goodness sakes, and hellhounds are known to be especially hungry when they are growing pups. Bradford thought back to the cross country journey which eventually led him here to Los Angeles. He had picked up his pale blue, windowless panel van from New Jersey from where he began his drive to his grandparent’s farm in Ohio. It had cost him a pretty penny to ship it from Scotland, and he had managed to get a flat tire somewhere in Pennsylvania in the middle of the night. While he was changing to the spare, Muffins somehow got out of the van and ended up in a restricted US Army training area where the military were conducting some kind of night time land navigation for Cavalry Scout trainees. Fortunately, Bradford was able to attract Muffins back to the van before she ate one of the soldiers, although the local papers did print a short blurb about one of the Army scout trainees being tracked by a Bigfoot. A Bigfoot? Really? Though Muffins had been known to get up on her hind legs to sniff around, no one could mistake her for a Bigfoot. Bradford laughed when he read the story at a local garage where he got his tire replaced. If Muffins really wanted to eat that soldier, she would have found him. What a big mess that would have been!
Once in Ohio, Bradford stayed for about a year with his grandfather and grandmother on their farm in Jefferson. It was one of those communities where most of your neighbors were farmers and homesteads were separated by vast tracks of rolling foothills. Bradford’s grandparents owned a large enough farm and had an expansive enough plot of land in their rural and quaint farming community that a neighbor missing an occasional chicken of goat or hunting dog didn’t raise much of a concern. Muffins was practically just a newborn back then and she only stood as tall as a great dane. Plus, her coat was still a pale grey with streaks of darker grey along her flanks, instead of the pitch black fur that it is today.
It wasn’t until a few weeks ago, when the remains of the runaway Smith girl was found on the outskirts of his grandparent’s property that they got suspicious. The Smith girl went to the Jefferson Area High School and her parents had grounded her when they found out that she was dating the Schuman boy. She ran away two weeks ago and her bloodied clothing and shoes was all that were found on a lonely stretch of road which ran parallel to the eastern boundary of grandpa’s land which led to Mill Creek. Soon after the police investigators left, Bradford’s grandpa began asking questions which Bradford had no good answers for. Why haven’t they seen Scooter, their pet basset hound, for the past week? Why were cows and pigs going missing at their neighbor Winslett’s farm? Most of all, after only a year of living on the farm in, why was Bradford’s dog so big that it was now a full two heads taller than Molasses, grandpa’s Ohio State Fair Blue Ribbon award winning giant steer? And what were those two pointy things growing out of Muffin’s forehead, anyway?
Bradford thought he was doing his grandparent’s a favor by releasing Muffin at night to hunt beyond the boundaries of their farmland, but apparently that would not be a viable solution any more. That night, Bradford went to the ATM in town and cleared out his bank account. He put his clothes in an army surplus duffle bag, before whistling for Muffins and stuffing her in the back of his old but trusty windowless van. Obediently, she climbed in, the van’s rear shocks squeaking in protest. Seeing as Muffins barely had the shoulder room to move, Bradford resolved that, when he could afford it, he’d purchase a bigger van, perhaps even a bus.
They drove south for the rest of the night across the state. After crossing the Ohio border, they stopped in Pittsburg, Pennsylvania, where Bradford got a cheap motel room on the outskirts of the city next to a truck stop. The taste of the skinny, crack addicted prostitute that Bradford picked up at the truck stop didn’t agree with Muffins, and she spit out the body parts, licking her butt to get rid of the poisoned taste. Muffins gave Bradford an annoyed look, but he just held up his hands and shrugged. They left Pittsburg right before evening and continued driving south, and the unfortunate residents of a mobile home located on a lonely stretch of land in the mountains satisfied Muffins for a while as they crossed into West Virginia.
They had travelled south through Skyline Drive and the Shenandoah Valley where Bradford allowed Muffins to get out and stretch her legs. Only a lone camper went missing that weekend who probably wouldn’t be found for a long time after Bradford and Muffins had left West Virginia. Westwards they drove, through Kentucky, southern Illinois, and Missouri, Bradford avoiding as many of the major populated towns and cities as he could. In Kansas, Muffins managed to wrangle down a heifer on a lonely field in the middle of the night. She didn’t eat again until Utah, when early one morning Bradford happened to spy a portly, middle aged fisherman pushing a small boat out into the Provo River for a little pre-dawn fishing.
That was, what? Seven days ago?
Bradford put his palm up to his face, kicking himself.
“Oh, Muffins. I’m sorry! I didn’t realize that it had been so long since you had last eaten. No wonder you were so hungry tonight!” Muffins tilted her head, staring at Bradford and whimpering.
“Come on, girl, let’s get out of here. But first,” Bradford walked to the black table, ejecting all of the DVR’s which had been recording the day’s events. Muffins eyed him curiously, wondering if she was still in trouble.
“Here girl,” said Bradford, tossing the DVR’s at the hellhound. Muffins leaped up, easily catching the discs in her mouth. She chomped down on them as if they were crunchy doggy treats, then, with a confused look on her face, spit the broken and chewed plastic pieces out and began licking her butt. Those tasteless crunchy treats weren’t yummy at all. She looked at Bradford, confused.
Bradford picked up the newspaper he was reading earlier before he dozed off. In bold black letters, the headlines of the Los Angeles Times blazed a story about how rioters and looters in Portland, Oregon, were being snatched up by men wearing uniforms and badges and being dragged into unmarked vans. Bradford smiled down at his security guard uniform and badge.
“Well,” he thought to himself. “Here’s a bunch of folks that no one will miss.”
“Come on girl,” said Bradford snapping his fingers and whistling. “Do you want to go on a road trip? Do you want to go to Portland? Come on, girl!”
Muffins jumped up and down excitedly, happy that all seemed to have been forgiven. Her mouth flopped open and her tongue wagged as slobber and spittle flew everywhere. The heavy thuds of her excited bouncing knocked monitors off the walls and toppled computers on to the floor, while her horns accidently dug huge gouges into the walls. Bradford laughed, grabbing Muffins by her scruff and hugging her, saying, “Who’s a good girl? Who’s a good girl?”
End

what are illinois covid restrictions today video

Gov J.B. Pritzker on Nov. 18 issued a new set of restrictions that the state said aimed to "limit gatherings and encourages residents to stay home as much as possible Illinois COVID-19: Gov. JB Pritzker tightens restrictions for Regions, 5, 7, 8; IL reports 10,573 new cases, 14 deaths DuPage, Kane, Kankakee and Will counties see Tier 2 restrictions WLS As COVID-19 cases, positivity rate and hospitalizations continue to rise in Illinois, new COVID-19 restrictions, including a ban on indoor dining, will be imposed on suburban Cook County. WEATHER... Illinois Under New COVID-19 Restrictions November 20, 2020. Starting today, the entire state of Illinois is under new COVID-19 restrictions aimed at slowing the spread of the virus. These restrictions mean that certain businesses will be closed to indoor customers, must limit the number of people in their place of business or have reduced hours Governor Issues Disaster Proclamation. JB Pritzker, Governor of the State of Illinois, in the interest of aiding the people of Illinois and the local governments responsible for ensuring public health and safety issues a Gubernatorial Disaster Proclamation in response to the ongoing coronavirus (COVID-19) situation. For those of you planning a trip outside of your home state during the Covid-19 pandemic, CNN Travel has put together a US travel guide so you know what you're in for before you go. Original Location: Illinois Gov. Pritzker issues more statewide restrictions to fight COVID-19 Continue Reading Show full articles without "Continue Reading" button for {0} hours. Illinois could have some COVID-19 Tier 3 mitigations The entire state has been under Tier 3 restrictions since Nov. 20 in an effort to combat a Subscribe Today Newsletters Facebook Twitter Illinois Gov. J.B. Pritzker announced new COVID-19 restrictions Tuesday that include capping crowds in retail stores and temporarily closing museums and casinos. All of Illinois' 11 regions have been moving between tiers and phases of the state's COVID-19 reopening plan in the days since officials announced that restrictions could be loosened beginning

what are illinois covid restrictions today top

Illinois Gov. Pritzker Holds Coronavirus Briefing NBC News

Governor JB Pritzker gives daily update on COVID-19 https://abc7.ws/3a32JBq WATCH LIVE: Gov. JB Pritzker gives daily briefing on COVID-19 cases in Illinois. LATEST: https://abc7chicago.com/health/illinois-covid-19-cases-rise-to-288-i... Even as some states continue to see a surge in new COVID-19 infections, a post-holiday rise appears to have leveled off in Illinois, opening the possibility ... Watch coronavirus livestream coverage of the outbreak as COVID-19 spreads, impacting markets and daily life across the U.S. and abroad. » Subscribe to NBC Ne... Illinois Governor JB Pritzker announced changes in how health officials will monitor the spread of the novel coronavirus and potentially reinstate stricter s... Stream your PBS favorites with the PBS app: https://to.pbs.org/2Jb8twGFind more from PBS NewsHour at https://www.pbs.org/newshourSubscribe to our YouTube cha... BREAKING CORONAVIRUS UPDATE: Gov. JB Pritzker expected to extend Illinois stay-at-home order at COVID-19 briefing. FULL STORY: https://abc7chicago.com/health... New Crowd Rules In Illinois Amid Coronavirus Pandemic - YouTube Gov. JB Pritzker announced crowds of more than 1,000 people will be banned in Illinois, as seven new cases were discovered. CBS 2... Stream your PBS favorites with the PBS app: https://to.pbs.org/2Jb8twG Find more from PBS NewsHour at https://www.pbs.org/newshour Subscribe to our YouTube c... Watch as Illinois Gov. J. B. Pritzker holds a coronavirus briefing. NBC News NOW is live, reporting breaking news and developing stories in real time. We are...

Current Illinois COVID restrictions | State and Regional

what are illinois covid restrictions today

what are illinois covid restrictions today - win

(My opinion) on the growing divide between the media and public opinion/criticism of politicizing public health policy.

Spring College Football Season - Week 1