"On the December 5 episode of The Daily Dish podcast, Jen opened up about one of the most “emotional” moments of the season when asked, “looking back at the season, was there ever a point where you thought, like, ‘What did I get myself into?’” “Yeah, there was,” Jen laughed. “At Mary’s luncheon. That would have been the point where I’m like, what did I do? Just because it hit so close to home, and I didn’t understand her viewpoints on some of the things. I didn’t understand why somebody who I thought would have the same viewpoint as me had a totally different viewpoint. I left that luncheon, and I called Coach Shah like, in tears.” Although it was a difficult situation for Jen to be in, she explained why opening up about her upbringing at Mary’s luncheon was such a heavy moment. “I think I got so emotional at the luncheon because, you know, Mary asked a question for us to the group. She said share something with the group that nobody knows, that will help us know you better and understand you better,” explained Jen. “I really appreciated Mary asking that question. And I took it to heart and thought okay, this is my opportunity to explain my culture and my upbringing to my group of friends so that they can maybe truly understand me better, and why I’m so passionate. So that was what I was attempting to do at the luncheon.”
"The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City is the latest series in the franchise to hit screens. And while the trailer has hinted at a potentially wild season - involving partying and booze-fueled antics - the Utah capital's Mormon community have thrown their support behind the reality show, according to one of its stars. Lisa Barlow, a practicing Mormon, revealed that members of The Church of Latter-Day Saints are supportive of the franchise. The 45-year-old exclusively told Daily Mail Australia on Friday: 'I have friends that have high up positions in the church - they're unpaid positions, it's all volunteer work - and everyone's been super supportive of me.' The brunette beauty, who is also the owner of a marketing company and liquor brand Vida Tequila, said she's also received feedback from friends and neighbours who have enjoyed watching the reality show. 'I live right behind a temple in Utah and all of my neighbours love watching, send me DMs, and texts. My peer group, my friend group, they're very supportive of me.' The LDS faith has a reputation for having a strict conservative culture - such as no sex before marriage and no consumption of alcohol, tea and coffee. But the New York-born, Utah-based reality star, considers herself 'Mormon 2.0'. 'Everyone knows me, we own liquor brands, they know I'm not orthodox in the way I follow the religion.' She continued: 'I love being LDS, but I'm definitely doing my version. Religion is optional… and I'm choosing to live the religion the way that works for me and my family.' 'I would never want to stop being LDS. I'm just choosing to live it in a way that feels good for us and our family. There's some of us that are orthodox and there are some of us that live it like me,' she added. Lisa and her husband John have been married since 2003. The couple share two sons - eight-year-old son Henry and 16-year-old son Jack.
"Emma Stone recently revealed her love for brand new series, The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. And star of the show, Lisa Barlow, has said that she's flattered by the La La Land actor's interest in the series. The 45-year-old told Daily Mail Australia exclusively on Friday: 'I think she's such an amazingly talented actress, the fact that she's entertained by our show and our cast is amazing.' 'I thought it was awesome, especially with the franchise being so new that she could know, and actually watch was kind of awesome,' she added. The self-professed 'Mormon 2.0', who owns liquor brand Vida Tequila, also revealed that The Bella Twins - Nikki and Brie Bella - have shown their support for RHOSLC. Lisa, who is business partners with the professional wrestling duo, said: 'I talked to them and they're like you're show's doing so great, we're so happy for you, and they've been super supportive.' She added: 'I admire them so much, and any advice Nikki and Brie give me I think is amazing. They're so grounded, they're such beautiful people inside and out.' BEVERLY HILLS
"Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star Kyle Richards is speaking out about her COVID-19 diagnosis. "I love these people so much ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ Some of you may have heard I have COVID. I got it after these photos were taken," Richards, 51, wrote on Instagram Saturday, along with her family's Christmas portrait this year. "Since I was diagnosed I have been separated from my family in order to keep them healthy. Unfortunately, Sophia also got it. We will stay in isolation until it's safe to see the family and others again. I can't wait to hug them," the Bravo star said."
"Getting rowdy! Cynthia Bailey did not expect a bachelorette party, but thanks to Kandi Burruss, she got one that Real Housewives of Atlanta fans will never forget. The reality stars teased the wild bash in exclusive interviews with Us Weekly, revealing that one of their castmates may have hooked up with a stripper — but they would not name drop. “The question is, what doesn’t go down at the bachelorette party?” Cynthia, 53, told Us about her last big party before marrying Mike Hill. “A lot goes down at the bachelorette party. And you know, it was, like, levels to the party.” The Sharknado 4: The 4th Awakens actress, who tied the knot in October, explained that the party was followed by the after party and then an “after, after party” that never seemed to end. “We had a great time and I think some of my crew even enjoyed my bachelorette party more than I did, although it [was] for me. Let’s just leave it right there,” she continued. “We set out to have a good time. Kandi did a great job throwing the bachelorette party. Like, I was not disappointed in any way and entertained to the fullest.” Kandi, 44, echoed the bride’s sentiments telling Us that “it was the most fun ever” and that was partially due to her being in charge. “I was given the job to put together this bachelorette party and you know, if it’s my job, I’m going to make sure it’s the best bachelorette party it could ever be. And that’s what I did,” she said. “I delivered. And if people had a good time then that’s what happened.” Neither Housewife would comment on exactly what went down during the party, but a RHOA teaser clip showed strippers in the house, clothes on the floor and security cameras being turned off. “It was a complete surprise to me, the party. I didn’t know I was getting a bachelorette party,” Cynthia explained. “So, when I came downstairs and saw all my cast dressed as strippers, I was like, ‘Oh, s–t I’m getting a bachelorette party!’” The newlywed star said she does not regret any of her party choices, but noted some of her pals may feel differently. “All I can tell you is I’m not going to get in trouble because I enjoyed the party. I had a great time and then I tapped out and went to bed at a certain time,” she told Us. “So, I’m not responsible for anyone else. You know, these are grown women, they have their own lives and they can do whatever they want to do and for me, it’s no judgment.” The guest of honor did, however, enjoy hearing about the drama when she woke up the next day. “Oh, I was like, I was like, ‘Where’s my tea cup? I’m ready for all the tea! I’m drinking all the tea, with extra sugar and cream,’” she said. “I was glad at the end of the day that everyone had a good time.”
“Real Housewives of Atlanta” star Kenya Moore reminisced over her past relationships during her Friday appearance in “The Wendy Williams Show,” detailing a disastrous date with Kanye West. While she doesn’t mention when the date took place, many presume it was before West tied the knot with Kim Kardashian-West in 2014. “I did go out with Kanye once,” Moore told Williams when asked if any celebs have ever asked her out. “That was a disaster.” “Somehow, we ended up going to his house and there was, like, some very explicit things on TV,” Moore shared through an awkward smile. “I was lost, he left me alone, I was just there for like five minutes, wandering around his house. When I followed the noises, he was watching something on TV that he probably shouldn’t have been. So, that was my exit!” “As much as I love him, it was just the craziest thing.”
"Leah McSweeney and her sister Sarah are giving back. The “Real Housewives of New York” stars are holding an online art auction to benefit undocumented workers out of work due to COVID-19. “Undocumented workers are the unacknowledged constant of our city,” the siblings said in an email statement to Page Six. The auction, called [Un]documented, is being hosted at LoveLuxury.com. It launched on November 24 and will be live until Monday, December 7 at 8 p.m. Curated by Sarah, 32, and Dana Albarella of Testify Books, donors can bid on works by New York-based artists like ESPO, Todd James, Futura 2000, Sue Kwon and more. As of press time, pieces were running from $200 to $5,000. “[UN]DOCUMENTED is an art auction fundraiser to support some of New York City’s most vulnerable people: The estimated 200,000 undocumented residents who have lost their jobs due to COVID-19,” the auction’s description reads. One hundred percent of the proceeds will go to the The New York State Youth Leadership Council‘s COVID-19 Emergency Relief Fund. [Un]documented is also being sponsored by Anita Durst and her organization ChaShaMa. Leah, 38, who runs the streetwear brand Married to the Mob, is a board member for the fundraiser."
"Dolores Catania is making sure her “RHONJ” co-stars are ready to slay this holiday season. The Bravo star, 49, is gifting the ladies lingerie to help them spice things up at home during quarantine. “I have a friend who owns Pulchra Intimates — very high-end, sexy lingerie,” Catania told Page Six Style. “A lot of [how] we feel revolves around us getting dressed and going to these beautiful events or even going for dinners with our friends and looking for reasons to feel sexy and look good.” And amid the ongoing coronavirus pandemic, she added, “A lot of my friends feel like they kind of lost that feeling of being sexy.” So Catania put together gift boxes with candles and a pheromone-infused perfume oil for her pals. “It’s a sexy kind of scent, a little bit strong,” she explained, adding that she even road-tested the fragrance herself. “I had it on and some guy followed me around the mall and I thought maybe he just liked me. And then another guy! Another guy asked me what I was wearing. I was like, ‘Oh, this s—t works!'”
"Margaret Josephs is staying home for the holidays this year, but she’ll still be celebrating in style. The “Real Housewives of New Jersey” star, 53, recently told Page Six Style that she plans to welcome Santa into her newly renovated home in a glam getup. “Every time I have a holiday party at my house, I always come out very grand,” she said. “I always have a big ballgown skirt with some kind of rock-‘n’-roll T-shirt, and very high heels and red lipstick. Everybody always cracks up, because I come down my staircase in some insane outfit.” Added Josephs, “I go big when I stay home. High heels in my house — I don’t care. Even when I’m cooking, I have the high heels on for the holidays!” While the idea of standing for hours in heels might sound dreadful to some, the “Caviar Dreams, Tuna Fish Budget” podcast host has an “amazing trick” that keeps her feet happy all night long. “I buy the cheap stripper high heels for underneath my ballgowns. They’re $49.99 and they’re clear and they’re very high and they’re so comfortable,” she told us. “That’s why strippers can wear them all the time. That’s my trick; I’ve been doing for years. Everybody always wants to know how I could do it. But if I’m wearing something really long where my shoes don’t show, I wear the stripper high heels.” Continued the reality star, “I learned it from somebody I met years ago in Florida, and she looked super tall and she dressed beautifully, but she would wear stripper high heels underneath her gowns. And it makes sense. You can stand in them all night. They’re padded. They’re comfortable. They’re great!”
Travel Diary - I am 35 years old, live in the UK and this week am on holiday in Scotland driving the North Coast 500 with my dog
I am 35 years old make £50,000 live in NW UK and work as an accountant. This week i’m on holiday with just my dog, driving round the North Coast 500, Scotland’s answer to Route 66. Day 1 - Saturday 6.30am -Eeek it’s here... I wake up and bring coffee upstairs to bed with the dog M for a last cuddle. I’m going to really miss my husband D but I do understand him not wanting to close his business again so soon after being closed for 3 months due to Covid. It might seem odd me holidaying on my own but we are very happily married - honest. 8am - I start getting my stuff together. I’m not a big fan of breakfast early on after waking up, but I have a long way to go today so I grab a muffin.I get myself ready, then get D to walk with me to the park, so that M can be thoroughly emptied and he gets a good run around. He’s not over pleased with his new car harness (he usually travels in D’s car with a dog guard) but I strap him in and off we set. 334 miles to go... 9am - I blast some tunes and M goes straight to sleep, and I push through until Gretna Green which takes just under 2 hours. I’ve often driven past here, but never stopped, but I need a wee and think it’s time to let M out too. We have a quick walk through around the visitor centre complex. 11.30am - I then hop back in the car, and my next stop is the Starbucks at the services. I had made myself a packed lunch but I annoyingly left it in the fridge and so I pick up a tuna melt and an iced coffee from some credit on my app. I’m breezing along at this point, the scenery looks stunning and I can’t understand why the sat nav is saying it’s going to take so long to arrive. I make a quick stop at a lay-by just to see if M wants a wee or a drink. Then I hit the outskirts of Perth... What should be the last hour takes 2, in fact it takes 30 minutes to drive a mile. I’m absolutely exhausted by this point and M is telling me he’s understandably fed up. We start moving again and I’m so tired it’s getting dangerous, and I notice that some of the lay-bys have access to a lovely riverside path, so I stop. I put M on his lead and we just do a 10 minute walk, which makes both of us feel better. Then the last 30 minutes through the most stunning scenery, and we’re here. Kingussie in the Cairngorms. I check in, this was one of the cheapest hotels and it’s great, they upgraded me to en-suite which was super kind, and the room is great albeit very hot. 4.30pm - I dump my bags and head straight out with M. I find a couple of places to let him off, then a lovely river for him to cool off as he’s super warm. Then to the hotel bar for a well deserved cold pint £4. The staff and (fairly well lubricated for 5pm) locals are so unbelievably friendly, couldn’t have picked a better place to stay. I shower as I’m dripping, get changed into something cooler, which I sweat in immediately as the room is boiling, then we walk out to where I have booked for dinner - the tipsy laird. The staff again are super friendly, and I order a cider, and the Tipsy burger with cheese. Everyone loved M and he was brought water straight away, but the only problem was that the table I was given was on the through flow to the toilets/kitchen so he was up and down like a yo yo saying hi to everyone, and I didn’t get the most relaxed meal. The burger comes though and it’s massive! Big feed for £12. I decide to leave after this, we’re parked in the middle of the through flow really, and it’s not super restful for either of us, so I pay the bill £15.65 and walk back the same way as earlier Max can have a run around and I phone D for a quick chat. 8.00pm - I head back to my hotel and buy a bottle of wine. £15.50 that I drink a glass of in the bar, a glass in bed, and pack the rest for another night. I watch a bit of tv on my iPad, and have an early night as we have an adventure tomorrow... Miles travelled - 334 Hotel - £55 Amount spent - £55.64 including a half tank of petrol the night before Day 2 - Sunday 7.00am- I had set an alarm this morning, as I have a bit to do, and I want to pre-empt any wee needs as we are 2 floors up in the hotel. He’s also had loads of water as it’s boiling. I didn’t get the best night sleep unfortunately which is a shame as the bed is amazingly comfortable. The room was unfortunately just super hot, nothing they could do as it’s been a heat wave. I’ve also never stayed away with M before except with family and he was hot and unsettled. So I had the window open, but all the young lads from Kingussie unfortunately decided to congregate under our window, playing their music from the car speakers making him quite understandably stressed. So I throw on last nights clothes and we go for a quick walk, then I come back up and shower, make coffee and pack the million things I seem to have brought up to the room. Not easy to travel light with a dog. I would have liked to have had breakfast here, but the hotel and both coffee shops in the village don’t open until 9, and I need to be on the road. So I just eat a muesli bar from the car and we head off towards Aviemore. Unfortunately my car sat nav gets me hugely lost, and keeps trying to send me down down gravel tracks to get on the A9 which surprise surprise don’t lead me onto a massive dual carriageway... I end up back tracking all the way I came as I had no phone signal to double check. Turns out I should have just carried on a few more miles. Puts me a bit behind schedule. 9.30am - I park the car at the air bnb that I booked, quickly pack a day rucksack and we frog-march down to the train station, as today, we’re going on a steam train. M’s first time on a train. I collect the tickets (£16.25 + £1 for M) and find our table. They have sold only half of the tables for social distancing and it’s really well organised. We choo choo off. It’s very picturesque, but mostly fields etc but still a worthwhile little outing. M isn’t quite as interested and goes to sleep. We get out at the first stop as I want to split my ticket, so I get a reservation for the later train back. They sort this for me (again everyone is super friendly) so I jump back on again. At the terminus I get out again for some photos and a leg stretch. 12.00pm - Back at the Boat Of Garten stop we gather our things and get off, as we have a reservation at the Boat inn for lunch. I order a pint of cider, and a sandwich and chips. We just hang out here for a while, well ages really as our train back isn’t until 3.30pm, unfortunately the middle train of the day got cancelled with Covid. About half way through I get a bit peckish again and order a sticky toffee pud and a glass of rose. I pay the bill which comes to £36.25. It’s coming up for our return train time so we wander back to the station, and not long after the train arrives. 3.30pm - We board and chug our noisy way back to Aviemore station, where I have a quick wee and then we walk the 30 mins back up to our air bnb to check in. I booked a tiny house just outside of Aviemore, and it’s ideal.. The lady who owns and runs it (it’s in her garden) has broken her elbow, but her Mum is there looking after her and they both show me around and make a fuss of M. I have a quick shower, and we both just chill out for a bit as we are exhausted. I decide not to go out tonight. It’s been a long couple of days, so I think fish and chips, a glass of wine and Netflix is on the cards. As I’m just about to head out the owner lets her dog in the garden and they have a fab 20 min play whilst I chat to Karen who is truly lovely. 7pm - I nip to the Co-op where I pick up a bottle of wine, and a pack of hot cross buns and some utterly butterly for the next 2 mornings breakfasts which costs £9.30, and then I order Haddock and chips for me, and a sausage for Max, £11.05. I head back to the cabin, get in my PJ’s, and just have a lovely chill. The cabin is amazing as night time wee’s can be achieved by just opening the door into the garden, shame I’m only here 2 nights. Write my trippie, and sleep like the dead. Miles travelled in a car - should have been 15 but was actually more like 30 Miles travelled on a train - 20 Accommodation - £75 Amount spent - £73.95 Day 3 - Monday 6.00am - I wake up early so I nip to the toilet and then am just able to open the cabin door to the garden, and M can sort himself out which is just so easy. I take my medication then we both get back into (our separate) beds for a bit and fall back asleep. I wake up at about 8.30am to a snoring dog. I pop the kettle on, make myself a coffee then toast 2 hot cross buns for breakfast, setting off the smoke alarm in the process. Both fully breakfasted I pack a bag, load the car and we’re off to Loch Morlich. 10am - I find the right car park after a couple of bodged attempts, and scrape together the £1.50 car parking charge. I get a leaflet with a map (just worth pointing out I’m fair terrible with maps) and set off towards the beach. Well Mr water baby practically drags me in when he sees the loch. After a couple of false starts, me going the wrong way, then me following the wrong colour signs, and a brief occasion where M may have decided to join some kayakers, we get on the right trail, we are going to walk all the way round the Loch, about 6km. It’s quite warm, and very midgey but stunningly beautiful and we don’t see anyone for the first half until we start to come across people who are doing shorter walks from the other way. Towards the end we cross a bridge and I lose my path altogether, I know I’m not right but I am right next to the loch and can see where I need to go, so I just clip him on the lead and we follow the road. Later on I see where I need to be; the path is elevated on the other side of the road, but I decide scrambling up verges next to busy roads isn’t overly sensible. We make it back to the beach, let the boy have one last swim, then head back to the car where much towelling is done, as well as a bit of pre lunch damage control with wet wipes and a clean t-shirt for me. 12.30pm -Our lunch stop is the Old Bridge Inn, and so I park up and we wander in. It’s a beautiful old pub, and it’s Monday today and the UK govt eat out to help out scheme and so it’s 50% off. I order a cheese board which comes and is absolutely fab (but why do they never give you enough crackers) and a pint of cider. I have a little nose popping up to see if there is any cheese going spare. I eventually catch someone’s eye and ordered a piece of cheesecake. This comes with sorbet which makes me really happy as I love sorbet (and can’t eat ice cream). I get the bill which comes to a mere £11.90. This Eat out to help out is really going to help me stay within budget. 2.00pm - Back in the car, we drive back up the road to the home of the Cairngorm reindeer herd. The hill walk is one of the things I would have loved to do (I did it in 2008 though) but obviously no dogs are allowed, and due to Covid the little paddocks with a few to pat and snap are closed. I drive up regardless though just to see if I can spot one from a distance. Unfortunately no luck, so I head all the way back through Aviemore where I stop at the Cairngorm Brewery to choose some beers for DH as a gift. I debate dropping the car and going out for a drink, but M can barely keep his eyes open, and so I nip to the Co-op for a cold bottle of Prosecco. I still do have a couple of half bottles of wine, but neither are cold, so I’ll drink them later in the trip when I get a fridge or a bar with ice I can pinch. 4.00pm I just have a shower, get in bed for a bit, have a glass of Prosecco, message D and write my notes. 6.00pm - After a bit of a chill out, I get dressed, sort a few bits out then we wander out and into the village. On the way past we stop at a stone circle I spotted on google maps, pretty funky and right in the middle of a residential area. We get to our dinner reservation half an hour early, but they kindly seat me anyway, but just say I can’t order food until my reservation time which is no problem. It is super busy and it takes a while to get a drink, but I just read my book. I decide on a smokey chilli chicken pizza and skin on fries, and it comes and it’s massive! Also very spicy but really tasty, can’t complain at all. Total including 2 glasses of wine was £20.75, an absolute bargain. I love this eat out to help out business! 8.00pm - We wander back to our little cabin. Pj’s and a chill out in bed, we’re moving on tomorrow and it’s an early start so to sleep for both of us.. a lovely day and I’m so glad to have seen Aviemore again, but I’m excited to move on and see some more new places. Miles travelled in a car - 15 Accommodation - £75 Amount spent - £51.35 Day 4 - Tuesday 7.00am - When the alarm goes off I snooze a couple of times, then start the process of showering and getting dressed whilst trying to make coffee and breakfast, pack and sort Mout all at once. I wash the dishes, then load the car, and off we go. Our first stop today is Dochgarroch lock, as we are going on a Loch Ness cruise. 9.00am - We make cracking time which is good as it did take me a little longer than expected to get everything in the car. We pass road signs highlighting a yellow weather warning for heavy rain (hello Britain) so I pack both our rain coats just in case. The boat is ready for us, so we wander on and sit outside at the back so I don’t have to wear a mask for 2 hours. 9.30am - We set off, chugging slowly down the canal, past the smallest lighthouse in Britain, and then when we enter Loch Ness we really pick up speed, charging right down the centre. No rain yet, in actual fact it’s very sunny so I keep swapping seats to try and get shade for us both, as stupid Mummy remembered his water bottle, but not his bowl to drink from. Yesterday when I went to the brewery, I completely forgot to pick up a beer or two for my best friends birthday, so when I see the Loch Ness lagers on the bar onboard, I buy 2. £9.20 which serves me right for not being smarter yesterday as they are double the cost. We pootle past Urquhart castle which I have visited myself back in the day, and I get some photos as they turn the boat round for us all to see. A lady is on board who is a single Mum with 2 kids (at least one special needs) and 3 chocolate Labradors. She managed to remember a water bowl though (what a human being) and she sends her little girl over to offer M water. I feel like my dog is quite rightly judging my parenting skills at this point as he pointedly drinks up like he’s not been offered water in days. We start to head back up the canal, and I must say I’ve really enjoyed it. Well worth it. 11.00am - Get back to the car and the first stop is filling the car up with Diesel. This comes to £45.47 but I buy a meal deal for £4.95 too as I’m getting hungry. Quick wee stop then I’m on the road,this is my first actual section of the NC500. First stop is Dornoch Beach. I park up for free and give M a real treat, a swim in the sea. I’m a bit nervous as it’s busier than expected but he’s completely excellent and charges around like a loon, but comes back to me with no issue at all. Much towelling and cold drinks for both of us, then back in the car. I’m looking for the stone remembering the last witch execution in 1727, it’s now in someone’s garden, but I find it. 1pm - On the road again we go, this time just to the outside of Dunrobin castle. I would definitely have paid to enter here and see the falconry display, but it’s not dog friendly. So I just take a photo and have a nosy, then it’s north again. This time it’s a quick stop at Cairn Liath, an old stone Broch. This is fabulous, we have to cross the A9 on foot which is a little hairy, but so worth it. I can let M off and we both have a good nosy around. 3.00pm - My last stop is a museum called the Timespan museum which I have read you can take dogs into. Unfortunately it’s closed though, so we decide just to push onto Wick where we are staying tonight. The roads get incredibly hilly, and I see my first Highland coo... you just wouldn’t imagine here you are anywhere near a big town, but then all of a sudden, a lidl, a retail park, and a town, with a wetherspoons 4.30pm -Find the hotel and check in, super friendly again. And I have a massive room on the ground floor near an exit to the car park, so incredibly thoughtful. The bed is huge too. I decide to go for a walk through town, I snap a photo of the world’s shortest street. And then I hunt down the Wetherspoons. I sit outside with M and order a pint of strongbow on the app. Absolutely ideal because I don’t even need to go inside to order and therefore leave him. I then realise I can order bar snacks from the app too, I even get 50% off my peanuts. If I’m honest, if i had known i could eat outside, and that it would be dry I would have eaten here tonight, but it is undoubtedly better to give the money to the independents after all. I stay here rather longer than expected, mostly because I realise my watch has not quite stopped but gone very slow. I spend under a tenner here including buying a bag of crisps for the car tomorrow. 7pm - Back to the room and I shower and get changed, feed M then wander to the hotel dining room. I’m eating in the residents lounge so I can keep M with me. To be honest with you, I think he’d prefer to be in the room in bed, but the hotel is packed with people coming past, and I’m worried he’ll bark if he gets startled so I keep him with me and he goes to sleep on the carpet. Then starts flirting with the Scottish ladies visiting. I order a wine, mozzarella sticks and chicken jalfrezi which are quite nice. This costs £20.50. I ring D, write my notes, then head to bed. It’s been a busy day, but a really good one.. Mikes travelled in a car - 149 Accommodation - £86.95 Amount spent -£91.48 but I have plenty of budget left from prior days to chip into the petrol Day 5 - Wednesday 8am- Waking up I take the boss out for a quick wee, then head back to the room. Breakfast for him and shower for me. This hotel has been absolutely ideal, the only negative for me is that the walls and ceilings were paper thin, and I think the other guests of the hotel found the Wetherspoons too. This made M a bit unsettled as it was pitch black by this time and quite noisy, so I had to sleep the first part of the night with my foot in his bed to keep him calm. But then all went quiet and we had a lovely night sleep. The bed was amazing. We have breakfast in the residents lounge, which was great, and they even bring M a sausage. 9.30am - Then it’s time to check out, we’ve been very leisurely this morning because a couple of the first suggested stops are here in Wick, but don’t open until 10. I first head in the car to the Old Pulteney whisky distillery to look at souvenirs for D. The weather this morning is overcast to say the least, and I drive through some very industrial type areas. The town has a very different look and feel to it than yesterday strangely. I arrive and the smell of the whisky greets me, but unfortunately also does a sign saying they were closed. I snap a photo then off we go. Next is the Wick Heritage museum. I arrive at 10.04am to a big closed sign on the door. I decide to sit it out for a minute, and a lady does arrive and go through the door about 10.10am, but despite sitting it out for a while, the door remains shut with the big closed sign on the door. I know these places are small, but I wish they had updated their website/social media as I had got the impression they would be open. I won’t be deterred at my next stop though, Tesco petrol station, I only need just over a tenner, but it’s really cheap so decide to top the tank up and it’s on to John O’Groats. I’m glad we didn’t stay here the night, but it was a great little stop. Thankfully most things are open, so I head into the little Brewery and get D 3 local beers from the brewery in the village £10.50, then grab myself a coffee for the car, £2.90. 11.30am - It’s then onto Duncansby head lighthouse. And a bit of a walk over the field to the sea stacks. I really enjoyed it here too. The Castle of Mey is my next stop, this once used to be owned by the Queen mother and apparently has lovely gardens. I was hoping to be able to nip in like Dunrobin yesterday for a quick mooch and a photo, but they are only letting people in with pre-booked gardens tickets. They are super friendly though and point out where on the road I can get a quick photo. Then it’s onwards and upwards again. I follow the signs then for Dunnet Head. This is the most furtherly north place in the UK (not actually John O’Groats). This was a longish single track road to get there, and again there is a lighthouse, and viewpoints over to the Orkney islands. Again very worth the trip up and Max enjoys the walk around. Good practice for the single track roads too. 1.30pm -Back down the long winding track and it’s the Dunnet Bay gin distillery next. I don’t drink gin either, but my husband and best friend do, so I nip in and buy them some souvenirs £19.50. I’m desperate for a wee at this point, and the lady from the gin shop points me next door to hotel where they have outdoor toilets they don’t mind people using. I notice a really busy eating area, and a quick google later and they are doing eat out to help out. It’s nearly 2pm by this point, and I’m hungry, so I grab Max and sit outside. I order a lime and soda and some mac and cheese. This turns out to be a great idea, as I don’t really see anywhere else to stop on the way, it’s also delicious and costs me a whole £6.48. I spy a sign for a beach, and the boy has been so good, we go for a walk on Dunnet Bay Beach. This is absolutely stunning, and we both absolutely love it. Well I do until he brings me a present of half a dead fish. 3.30pm - Onto our destination for the evening, the village of Tongue. It doesn’t look that far, but the roads quickly become single track, very hilly and winding, and this time there are HGV’s rumbling past. I have to be honest I find it fairly traumatic, and don’t really get to take in the very stunning scenery for trying to avoid sheep who are napping in the passing places! I really wish I had stopped to photograph the roads. Truly beautiful but I didn’t half wish D was here. But I make it in one piece, with a rather big sigh of relief. I unclench my hands, and check into my room, it’s a single which is no problem, in fact the bathroom is bigger than the bedroom strangely. They have left me a complementary bottle of wine though which is a nice touch (I pack this for another night) I have a cool shower and just chill out for an hour or so with my book. It’s very warm, and incredibly midgey, I must have about 50 bites on me, but the bed is comfy. We go down and I order dinner, onion bhaji’s followed by lamb shank. The food is a little expensive, but absolutely lovely. I’m quite tired, so I take M out for a very quick walk round the village, then we head back upstairs. I think I have a lot of single track driving to do in the morning, so I have an early night watching MAFS Australia in bed. I think the older I get the earlier my bedtimes do 😂 It’s been a really good day despite a couple of closure early on. Miles travelled in a car - 95 Accommodation - £60 Amount spent £79.50 Day 6 - Thursday 7.30am - I wake up to my alarm. Both of us slept really well. Think M is getting used to hotels now. It’s fairly wet, wild and windy this morning, but my weather app tells me it should be fairly short lived. For today anyway. Usual dog wee, shower, and packing up of our worldly possessions. 8.30am - I go down for breakfast, having packed the dog bed in the car, to find that I can’t have him with me for breakfast. I decide as it’s cool the car is the safer option, but I rush through breakfast as quickly as I can. I sneak a couple of bits out in a napkin to the car for him, then I pack up and check out. 9am - We drive for the first hour on single track roads, stunningly beautiful again but thankfully quieter so I build confidence a bit. I soon figure out the best way for me to slot in behind someone at a safe distance and almost take a tow. That way they make the call to go or stop, and I just follow. It takes me an hour to do 28 miles, but I’m happy enough pootling along. In fact my first tow is a campervan doing 30, but then I progress later to a VW Sirvocco doing 40, go me... 10am - Our first stop today was Smoo Cave, well what a fab stop, and I’m even able to let the little monster have a swim. It’s stunningly beautiful, and well worth the 10 minute walk back up and down. It has got very very warm, completely different to how it looked this morning when I got up. 11am - Only a few miles away was the Balnakeil craft village. I make a pit stop first at the famous Cocoa Mountain, where I get a coffee which comes with 4 chocolates for £5.95. I was going to buy D some chocolates to take home from here, but they are £1 a chocolate, and I’m worried they’ll end up in a soggy mess by the time I get home as it’s warmer than expected. So I just sit in the sun with my coffee for a bit have a quick nosy in one of the shops, but I’m no good in a mask, so I head back to the car and get on my way. 12pm- I snap some photos of the famous Kylesku bridge, then carry on, I miss the sign for the Rock shop which is recommended, this is possibly because it may be closed, and decide to do the optional detour to Lochinver. This wasn’t the best call. It’s 11 miles which does take about 20 minutes each way, and I head to the pottery shop. Well it’s all stunning, but at over £35 for a mug, it isn’t the souvenir shop for me. I haven’t had any lunch, so I stop at the Lochinver larder, a famous pie shop. Well all I want to do is buy a takeaway pie for lunch, but after 10 minutes in the queue which is just to pay, and seeing that no one who has ordered since I’ve arrived has got their lunch, I give up, I don’t want to leave M in the car for any longer. Luckily I have a spare pack of crisps and some haribo in the car. 2pm - Continuing on towards Ullapool which is my stop for the night, I spy the sign for the ruins of Ardvreck castle. Well this is a great stop and cheers us both up. He gets to swim, and I walk and clear my head. It is so beautiful, and we both really enjoy it. Not long after another sign for the Knockan Crag geological reserve. We enjoyed this too and walk the loop above the car park reading the signs and looking at the exhibits. 4pm - Not far from here to Ullapool, so we bundle back in the car and check in. It’s motel style, and can park straight outside the door, much easier for lugging our stuff in and out. Accommodation options in Ullapool weren’t cheap, this cost £95 for the room, and is 20 mins walk from the village, but it serves food and they are very nice, if a little Covid stressed. 4.30pm - We decide to follow their route to the village to give M a good walk. Ullapool is smaller than expected, but it’s very rugged and picturesque. We have a quick drink in the Seaforth inn £7, but then the bad weather is clearly coming in, and it starts raining, I’ve come out in flip flops, and a t-shirt, so not the most sensible, but it was sunny when I left half an hour ago. We nip into the Ferry Boat inn who kindly offer us a 30 min rain respite before their table bookings, and that’s all it takes. It’s sunny again. £5.50 for a glass of wine. 7pm - We wander back up the hill and order some food, goats cheese to start which is really tasty, and pepperoni pizza which is lovely but could do with 5 more mins in the oven. The owners are lovely, and we have a good chat; then it’s time for bed. Chat to D, tv, book and bed. Miles travelled in a car - 104 Accommodation - £95 Amount spent - £61 Day 7 - Friday 7.30am - I wake up just before my alarm. Didn’t hear a peep out of the hound last night. He’s definitely now a hotel kinda dog. Pack everything up which is so much easier with the car parked right outside. Then I drive round for breakfast. I’m not really hungry but I do my best. 9.00am - I nip to Tesco to get some car snacks and a birthday card for my niece, £8.80, then join the queue for the petrol station on the way out of the village. I decide to fill up just in case which comes to £21.23. We set off, and our first stop is the Corrieshalloch gorge which has an incredible suspension bridge. We have a wander about and snap some photos, then back to the car for us. 11am - It’s then a detour to Mellon Udringle beach, this is up a single track road, I start to wonder if I have gone wrong, but I get there and it’s beautiful. M charges around and swims for ages. I had noticed a field of sheep when we arrived, but what I stupidly hadn’t noticed was the field had no fences. I turned round and M was nose to nose with a rather large ram with horns bigger than me. They were just looking at each other. I screeched and grabbed him quick and we toddle back off to the car and back on the road. There are some famous gardens at Inverewe which sound fab, but we can’t take dogs in so we didn’t stop. 1pm - About a mile or two before the village of Gairloch I hear some funny noises (followed by a funny smell) from the back seat. I quickly turn round and see a sea of vomit. Now anyone who knows me knows that I can deal with all the poo in the world, but I’m terrible with vomit. I think it’s a belly full of sea water as normally he has a gut of iron. I quickly find a petrol station and pull in, finding somewhere to tie poor M up I try to deal with the back seat. I throw the towel straight in the bin which caught most of it, but it’s everywhere and he clearly is feeling really poorly and I can’t set off yet. Leaving him tied up in the shade with some water I take the opportunity to jet wash the car as it’s covered in bird poo and he eats his body weight in grass, then throws it all back up again. Feeling safe enough to set off, we literally make it to the next parking stop, and we limp on like this for some time. We get to the Victoria falls car park, and a short walk seems to do him a bit of good. The falls are lovely, but it’s very very midgey. 3pm - A little further on we reach the shores of Loch Maree. It’s a lot less midgey here, so I sit on a rock next to the car, and he just potters about eating grass and paddling his feet in the water, and he seems to be a bit better. So we set off properly again. We reach Torridon and decide not to stop for a drink, but plod on. The roads get very narrow but it’s incredibly beautiful. 4.30pm -Arriving at our destination for the night, Lochcarron, I have a drive through the village, then head off to a tartan shop called Lochcarron weavers. I was looking for cushions or maybe a rug, but I end up buying DH a lovely woollen jumper that’s on sale at £40, guessed the sizes so fingers crossed. I decide to leave the ruins of Strome castle for the morning, so we drive back to the Loch, and I spot a fish and chip van. I’ve had no lunch with vomit gate, so I just get a portion of chips, and I eat them on a bench looking out over the Loch, but then the rain starts so we go check in. Now I must say the reviews of this place were terrible. But it was cheap, dog friendly and right where we needed to be, so I decided to take it with a pinch of salt. I’m glad I did, the room does look a little dated, but it’s clean, very friendly and I’m on the ground floor. My room in Ullapool last night was dated too but cost £95, today was £55. I give him some water and a nap (but no tea as yet which causes some consternation) then we wander next door to the barestaurant when he has had a good rest. 6pm - The food looks fab. An older lady with her son orders the special of ribs, and I’m sold. I order a leek and goats cheese tart followed by the ribs, the food is a little dear, the starter alone is £9, but we are very remote and it is very tasty. I would normally have had a helper with the ribs, but I didn’t dare, so I got a lot of incredulous puppy stares. Instead a tiny portion of dry dog biscuits for him, and a glass of wine for me from the car, and an early night again. Miles travelled in a car - 130 Accommodation - £55 Amount spent - £73.93 Day 8 - Saturday 5am - I wake up in the pitch black to the unmistakeable sound of retching. Jump up, put the lights on and there are 3 piles to deal with.. thankfully just undigested grass really, and I have my handy wet wipes so we have it cleaned up in no time, and I decide to take him out to see if he needs a wee or anything whilst I’m awake. We just have a quick walk along the water front, being careful not to get locked out of the hotel, then back in and it’s back to bed for both of us. 8am - Getting up again and the monster seems to be feeling much better. We go next door for breakfast, but I just have a yoghurt and a croissant. It was lovely though. I really enjoyed this hotel, it was friendly, laid back and right on the route. I pack up the room, and give M a third of his normal breakfast (which he wolfs down) and we get in the car. 9.30am - We head just up the road for now to the ruins of Strome castle. I can’t let him off the lead here because there are lots of sheep, but it’s a great little stop for a walk around. It starts to rain but only quite lightly at this stage. 10am - He seems ok so we get on the road towards Inverness and eventually home (tomorrow). I must admit I had very serious thoughts of trying to just head home, both yesterday and at 5am, but I’m very far from home, nearly a 9 hour drive, and as such I think it would be better to stop regularly to offer him water and fresh air, rather than trying to push through. I have a quick call with D who reminds me that dogs eat things they shouldn’t all the time and to stop worrying, he’s eating, drinking and toileting normally and so to carry on but just not over feed him and offer him regular breaks. So our next stop is the Glen Dougherty look out, which is apparently stunning on a clear day but it wasn’t a clear day. So just a quick look about and off we go again. Nice for a photo and a leg stretch though. 11am - Last stop for us on the NC500 route is Rogie Falls. This is a great stop and walk down to the waterfalls. Apparently at the right time of year you can see salmon jumping up the falls, but it wasn’t to be today, this stop was incredibly busy, the car park was completely full and I had to wait a while to get parked, but it was a lovely walk and we both really enjoyed it. 12pm -Not long after this we reach Inverness and leave the NC500 route, we’re a little early to head to Pitlochry which is our stop for the night, so I do a couple of things, firstly grab a quick drive through McDonald’s for lunch £8.80, then fill up the car at the Tesco petrol station which comes to £19.87. 1.30pm - It’s only 90 mins to Pitlochry from here. And so I think I’ll be a little early really, so I head to Culloden battlefield for a walk around. Well unfortunately the heavens just open, and we are both completely drowned. Rather rudely I felt M wasn’t over interested in the Jacobites. But we have a very quick walk round, and then a towel off and on the road. I tell him I’ll put Outlander on for him when we get home. I’m actually very interested in history but I have been to the visitor centre before (and read and the watched the Outlander series which I’m sure is super accurate ). 4pm - We hit Pitlochry. I can’t get into the hotel car park, but I find street parking and check in nearby. This place is quite fancy, it’s in the same chain as the lunch I had on the steam train right at the beginning. Here it’s sort of a fancy gastro pub with rooms upstairs. This was the costliest of my accommodation at £99 but also the nicest. My heart does sink a bit though when I see where my room is. Sort of up two flights of stairs and round a lot of corridors and through several fire doors. I really hope we don’t need 5am dashes tonight. It’s nice to have a bit of luxury though too, most of my accommodation has been fairly basic, not even offering toiletries or tea/coffee in all cases. So this room with it’s very fancy toiletries and biscuits is very welcome. 5pm - We chill out for a bit, and I even nod off for 15 mins which is incredibly unlike me. Then we have a quick walk through the town, which looks lovely, and then head into our hotel/pub for dinner. I order the spaghetti carbonara with garlic bread. It’s lovely but very big, and I only manage half, but I did have lunch today. 8pm -We go for a last walk through the town, I contemplate an outdoor drink at a different pub, but I can’t find a table, so I have a glass of car wine, call DH, and watch Indian Matchmaking on Netflix. Miles travelled in a car - 147 Accommodation - £99 Amount spent - £78 Day 9 - Sunday 8am - I wake up, and the boy has slept like a log. It really was a lovely room. I get up and he seems in no rush to leave his bed, so I quickly shower and pack and we head down the maze together. I take him for a wee and load the car. And then we pop in through the front door for breakfast. They kindly serve me brekkie in the bar so I can keep M with me. I order a couple of hot items, and they bring Lorne sausage which I’m not sure about so I risk sneaking a bit to M who thankfully seems back to normal. 9am - We jump in the car, and get on the road. We are going home today, but stopping at Glasgow to see my little brother. I stop at a Starbucks just outside Perth for a coffee (£10 loaded on my app), then arrive just before 11 to Pollok country park. Unfortunately it’s really very rainy, but I find my brother (A) who is 21 and just finishing up his time at uni, loan him my brolly, and put rain coats on both M and myself. We walk for over 2 hours, just chatting and getting lost. Most of the walk is spent trying to find the Highland Cows I drove past on the way in, and we do finally succeed. M absolutely loves it, and doesn’t stop running around and sniffing everything in sight. Eventually we decide to call it a day as I’m a way away from home. I drop A off at the Asda, pick up a quick Maccy’s for the car £8.40 and we head home. We end up doing it in one go (about 3.5 hours) as M was completely zonked out on the back seat. DH phones and we chat for ages, then with about 45 mins to go, we hang up and he says he’ll see me at home. I get in, to no DH. I unpack his gifts and finally give him a ring. Turns out there has been a terrible shock as his Dad had a heart attack whilst out shopping. Thankfully all is ok, but DH gets home a bit ashen, and we go round to his Mum’s to await seeing how his surgery goes, which thankfully is all fine. D picks up an Indian takeaway on the way back from his Mum’s, he opens a beer from his gift pile, and we breathe a big sigh of relief. It’s super lovely to see him. Miles driven - 300 Amount spent - £18.40
Living standards in 4E Skyrim: crude estimates and their implications
TES economies are primarily set up with gameplay in mind. For instance, iron swords are extraordinarily cheap at only 25 Septims (S) in Skyrim. However, this does not mean that TES real wages must always remain a mystery. Some items are of limited use to the player, and it is these items – food, utensils, and fuel – which are the most crucial to your everyday citizen. Exploiting the fact that such items are probably reasonably priced without gameplay as their main focus, we can exploit economic history methods to shed light on living standards in 4th era Skyrim. My method to estimate living standards is as follows. Firstly, identify any examples of nominal wages which are independent of the player’s level. Secondly, create a reasonable ‘subsistence bundle’: that is, how much money an individual would need to buy the resources to survive. Converting wages into numbers of bundles gives us real wages, showing the extent of poverty and inequality amongst the ordinary folk of Skyrim. How much are people paid? Ah, if only we could look inside Skyrim’s business ledgers! We have few accounts of nominal wages in-game, but the most precise source is Scouts-Many-Marshes, an Argonian dockworker in Windhelm. He bemoans that his fellow Argonians are only paid 8S per day. He also suggests that Nord workers are paid ten times as much: 80S. We also know the earnings of a second character: the Dragonborn’s spouse. Having set up a shop post-marriage, they tend to give the Dragonborn a share of 100S a day. Assuming an equal split in profits between partners, your spouse earns 200S a day. I think its reasonable to assume these are representative of nation-wide wages. Consequently, even amongst the common folk, there is stark inequality ranging from exploited Argonians at 8S per day's work to the 200S of successful traders. Perhaps most representative of the average person is the 80S earnt by human labourers. How much does subsistence cost? Nominal wages are essentially meaningless in terms of aggregate living standards. Fortunately, we can crudely convert money into the goods it purchases. How? Well, people need to consume goods to survive. If we can calculate a subsistence bundle of the basic food, fuel and consumable items needed to live and how much it costs we can convert wages into several subsistence bundles to show if Skyrim’s people are just getting by. To start building our bundle, consider food. The cheapest full meal you can craft in Skyrim is the potato soup, costing only 1S for a potato and 2S for salt. Knowing that potato soup costs 3S to make and assuming individuals must eat three full meals to survive, food costs a minimum 9S a day. However, people need to drink too, and Nord Mead – costing 5S – is the cheapest way in-game. While it would be good to have a non-alcoholic beverage, mead was historically cheap and widely drunk so it’s a fair substitute. Let us say people drink two a day: that’s a total of 10S on drink. Finally, people also need to sleep. Inns charge 10S a night. You may object to using this figure: surely inns are heavily marked-up like hotels? However, for a bed and a hearth, it’s not bad. Just fuelling a fire with firewood costs a minimum 5S and the room includes lighting. Doing some simple mathematics, we find that for accommodation, food and drink, a person needs just 29S daily to subsist in 4th era Skyrim. Skyrim’s citizens need clothes and utensils too but these are reusable and are so cheap we can essentially ignore them: decent clothes plus boots cost 12S. Living standards In real terms, your spouse is well-off: as a shopkeeper, they make daily profits of 200S, equivalent to nearly seven subsistence bundles. Others are not so lucky: Nord dockworkers make 2.75 bundles, while Argonian labourers only make 0.275 of a bundle. Poor Scouts-Many-Marshes must earn just enough to pay for his (presumably cheaper than 10, as it is shared accomodation) rent in the Argonian Assemblage. He probably hunts most of his food in the waters around Windhelm so to not exhaust his meagre earnings. Argonians aside, these crude estimates suggest that human workers are somewhat well off in Skyrim. 2.75 bundles compare favourably with most of the world for most of history, where peasants and labourers tended to earn between one and two subsistence bundles. Furthermore, it seems to accord with what we see in game: humble citizens often have some jewellery. One credible explanation for why Skyrim’s living standards exceed those in, say, medieval China, is that Skyrim’s women have fewer children. As Malthus rightly identified (for most of history) greater wealth leads to more surviving children, and higher populations erode the per capita gains in wealth above subsistence. However, limited childbirth may mean above-subsistence wealth per head is sustainable, and Skyrim plausibly has fairly low fertility. Women likely marry later – probably during their later 20s, not their teens or early 20s – because as medieval-esque worlds go, this is an egalitarian society. Women can become guards, adventurers, or traders, delaying marriage and children to focus on their careers. A similar story may have happened in Europe after the Black Death: a prominent theory suggests that women gained jobs in pastoral agriculture, delayed marriages and had fewer children. This led European living standards to diverge above Asia. In sum, the working people of Skyrim are poor, but they could be even worse off. Even human labourers make good wages by historical standards, although Argonians suffer immense poverty. Moreover, Skyrim has enough wealth to sustain a middling trader class. It is quite plausible that Skyrim’s relative gender equality meant lower birthrates, creating the possibility for even the average labourer to enjoy some luxuries.
It’s night out again, and things have quieted down. The Little People are here again, and the place feels right again with a house full of children. We’re missing only the older of our two Grandsons. The younger one, the two-year-old, is asleep with his Grandma. We found out that his Mother spanked him a little bit when he tried to flash his Sister’s class on the computer again. He and I settled down on Grandma’s bed shortly after he got here, at his request, to watch “Monster House” again; a favorite of his and mine. Within a few minutes, though, he had lost interest, and started beating Gramps with a stuffed animal he’d been playing with, and trying to smother me with it. Let’s eat! time was its usual good time: the oldest of the girls was getting impatient with me, waiting for her ramen. It had to be fixed just right, piping hot straight out of the pot, with a single ice cube on top to cool it down. The youngest wanted to know what was taking so long with her spaghetti. The second oldest was mad because I didn’t drop everything and fix her her waffle with peanut butter spread on top, and chocolate milk on the side. I explained to her that it would be ready in a minute, but that I was also working on two previous orders at the moment. The two-year- old was enjoying his strawberry and banana yogurt, and requesting/demanding a refill on his chocolate milk. So, yeah, I was a low-rent short order cook and waiter again. (I loved it). I could hear Momma laughing from the next room - This she heard. She hadn’t been hearing too good lately; a problem with one of her ears. She’s going to the Doctor on Monday. I don’t hear so good, either, these days, especially out of my right ear, so we’ve been yelling/talking to each other for a few days: “I Said, how do you want your damn eggs?!!” Like that. Remembering Blake and his commercial venture(s) brings to mind some other things that happened during that float: We started hitting liberty ports on the way home - all of us except for one of our number, who was in some hot water (another story), and who would never set foot off the ship at any port we came to. A lot of paint would get chipped, though, and a lot of things would get repainted. The rest of us felt pretty bad for him, actually, even though none of us had any reason to, for he had caused problems for more than a few of us. We felt that, sure, punish him when we got home, but don’t take this away from him. But it was not our decision. He hadn’t wanted to come, anyway, and had tried not to. The guy we really felt for was the Colonel’s driver, who had, during the Exercise, been caught with weed by some representatives of the Host Country who had been monitoring the exercise. He was still their guest when we left, but, due to the rumors we had heard about the luxuriousness of that Country’s jail/prison system, maybe he wasn’t having such a bad time of it. Some other casualties of the exercise had been two helo’s carrying two squads of British Royal Marines that had come to grief while flying in heavy fog. We hated hearing it, for we had met some of them in the field, training alongside them, and had liked and respected them very much. We never did find out anything more about the level of seriousness of the situation, or about injuries or casualties. We hit Rota, Spain for a few days. We found out while we were there that Spanish sailors would trade just about anything they owned for the cheap but dependable Zippo lighters that many of us carried. Apparently they were very hard to come by there, and were highly prized. Blake was despondent, of course, at the missed opportunity. Had he known, I’m quite sure a good number of them would have made their way aboard ship when we left home. Scotland was an adventure worthy of a story of its own. I loved the old castle at Edinburgh, and spent considerable time there exploring it. I met an Israeli girl there. We spent some time together one pleasant afternoon, before she had to leave with the people she had come with. The winding, climbing cobbled streets of the Old Town, with their three and four stories or more of old buildings rising straight up from the edges of the narrow streets, bathed in gentle rain and yellow lamplight, were pleasant to roam late at night, with a stop or two in a local pub to have a drink and get out of the misty drizzle for a bit. I spent a night in one the first night there, that had been converted into a kind of bed and breakfast. I had a tiny garret room with a low steeply slanting ceiling, not much bigger than the bed pressed up against the large window. The windowsill was at the level of the bed, and overlooked the slick, shining cobbles of the street far below, glowing in the light of the streetlamps. Rain ran down the outside of the glass, and the panes were cool to the touch. Sunken low in the deep feather tick, and nestled beneath a thick, pillowy white comforter, I looked out of the window until I drifted off, and had the first restful night’s sleep I’d had in quite some time. We had heard of the murder of John Lennon in NYC while en route, by a man whose name is not worthy of being spoken, and were saddened by it, as was the world. We did not anticipate the effect it would have on us. We were looking forward to seeing the sights of Liverpool, The Beatles’ hometown, when we put into port. Most of us, Sailors and Marines alike, were still getting ready to go out on the town on liberty when the first casualties began making their way back to the ship. Marines and Sailors who had ventured out in ones or twos had been set upon by local youths. Some bore only minor injuries, but some others were beaten quite badly. Marines and Sailors formed up groups, and went looking for payback for their beaten friends. Some of the Sailors who worked in Engineering and in other departments exchanged their street footwear for the heavy steel-toed shoes their jobs required. Things started getting pretty bad, and then got worse. Groups of Sailors and Marines fought with groups of local youths in the streets. Individuals on both sides were targeted and attacked. Senior Enlisted and Junior Officers, both Marine and Navy, started going out in their own groups, trying unsuccessfully to quell the growing violence. A group of us from the Company roamed the streets together. We were not accosted, due to our number, maybe, but we met others who had been. We passed a local kid who was literally dripping on the sidewalk as an elderly couple tried to help him. The two old people glared at us as we passed, as if we were the ones responsible. Down an alleyway the mouth of which we passed, some of our guys had a local on the ground, and were kicking and stomping him unmercifully. Bobbies were thick on the ground, patrolling in pairs. I had not before encountered such universally big men. I don’t believe we met one who was less than six feet tall. Their female counterparts were very attractive women to our eyes (we were young guys, ok? What else would we notice first?). You know how a woman who is obviously very fit has a certain glow about her. They patrolled unarmed, except for the nightsticks that they carried, and their radios. Each had a whistle that they would blow to signal to any other officer within hearing that they needed assistance. When one would be heard in the near distance, every officer within hearing would take off in a dead run in the direction from which it came. The women, though smaller and shorter than the men, had no difficulty keeping up. The skirts that they wore were long enough for modesty and professional decorum, but were short enough to not prove a hindrance. Whistles were going off everywhere. Things were getting out of hand. Though none of our guys had been directly affected, and we felt, disloyally or not, that we didn’t have a dog in this fight, we knew that we would be drawn into it whether we wanted it or not if we stayed out here much longer. We asked one if the officers for directions to a nightclub we had heard about. He advised us to stay away from it, as it was full of “punks and bitches”, and that our presence there would surely spark trouble. We found it on our own, anyway. It Was a nice place, and full of young people about our own age and slightly older, who were just the opposite of the Officer’s description. We were made to feel quite welcome, and realized that the Officer had been trying to protect Them from Us. That made us feel kind of bad. We realized that we had found a good place to hole up until the streets, hopefully, settled down a little. We ended up having a really good time, in the easy presence of others about our own age, who readily extended the hand of friendship. It was learned that it was one of our number’s birthday. The DJ announced it over the speakers, and everyone in the place, much to his chagrin, cheered and clapped, and toasted his health. Any time a certain song was played, at random intervals throughout the night, everyone in the place would instantly form a conga line around the edges of the huge open room, and, holding the waist of the person in front of them, would step and dance around its perimeter until the song ended. At first we did not join in, but each of us was taken by the hand and dragged into place. Thereafter, we participated willingly. It was a perfect night. A man with a monkey was taking pictures with a Polaroid. For five bucks, he would perch the monkey on the person’s shoulder and snap a shot. One of our Cpl’s elected to have his picture taken. The monkey pissed on his jacket. Later that night I spoke with a Police Sgt that I met. We discussed what had happened. He told me that he and his fellow officers bore us no ill will. He said that they knew it was the local “punks” who had started things, and not us. I came away from the whole thing understanding that they had been expecting something of the nature to happen, and had been out in more than their usual numbers to try to deal with it. We had no further trouble in any other port stop in the UK. There was just that one night of escalating violence on what would otherwise have been a pleasant night of mild weather in a pleasant place.
This was a rather fast tour for the most part over 10 days at the end of August and start of September (not even 10 days really, more like 8.5). It was intended as exploration to get a feel for the land, and to then come back to the areas later. The idea was 2 hour hops with time for hiking and exploring each day. In the end it worked out as way too much driving, clocking in 800 miles (1287km) in 7 days (not helped by the weather which just encouraged more driving). The main lesson I learned from this is that I would book earlier to find nice B&Bs to use as a base for longer stays in a smaller number of areas. Timing - Last few days of August to early September. What we did - Explored really. Had hoped to hike more but the weather didn’t play along. Language – Easy being a native speaker. Never any problem with an overly thick accent. More problems trying to pronounce place names. Budget – I kept this open but without doing anything excessive in price. Accommodation and eating out were the main costs. Skye and Edinburgh had especially high accommodation prices. Accomodation - From faded glory hotels to wooden sheds. Mostly chosen by reasonable price and being in the right area. We only really booked most of the stuff a month or less in advance which limited the choices of where to stay somewhat. Weather – Cool and wet. We had on/off drizzle most of the time. What the BBC called heavy rain was mostly never too bad. It seemed to be unlucky with a week of bad weather after a period of good weather. It got to be a bit frustrating when everyday just seemed to be this way, but cleared up towards the end. There was no midge problems at least. We got about 3 very minor bites during the whole trip. Touristyness – Edinburgh and Skye were very touristy. Otherwise most areas were not bad or going through the backroads almost empty. Transport – Rental car from/to Stirling. Train from Edinburgh to Stirling and vv. Regrets – Too high a pace. Just for some more listicle….
Best surprise: Driving on the scenic roads through the Cairngorms.
Most expensive: Skye and Edinburgh.
Most touristy: Skye and Edinburgh.
Worst tourist tack: Princess Diana memorial tartan.
--- General lessons learned ---
Wind and rain was likely at any time. We came prepared and were very glad. Waterproof trousers, jacket, and mud suitable shoes were on hand at all times.
Cafes often open at 9am or later. Getting an early start if you want to have a coffee first can be a little hard
Free parking was much more common than I expected. Even spots like Eilean Donan castle (where I am sure England would charge you £8 or more). Though finding a road-side parking spot with a good views or access to hiking routes was often not an easy feat. Likewise car parks in more popular areas were often very busy/full.
If you are driving on the more rural roads then add up to 50% to the journey time for slower traffic, single lane passing, stopping for the views, and not being able to drive at the limit anyway without killing yourself on the unknown windy roads.
Maps.me not as detailed here as in other places. It also massively underestimated the driving time in rural areas due to the above point. Google maps was more accurate, but also gave optimistic driving times.
Driving on the single lane roads was mostly fine. There are lots of passing points and considerate drivers. Mostly it was only cars with non-UK plates that caused problems.
Potholes in the road, and sheep on the road, were the two main driving hazards. The potholes were especially nasty in the rain when it was impossible to tell if something was a 5mm deep puddle, or a 10cm deep destroyer of wheels. The sheep mostly stayed out of the road, but did tend to sit right on the verge and stare as you drove past inches from their faces.
Skye in particular.
Skye is very popular. Book accommodation early, and reserve restaurants rather than just turning up.
The services and access on the island are being expanded, but it was also clearly at a limit. Outside of the roads between the main villages, it is all single lane with passing points. Parking was limited and often full, near full or even overflowing (and this was even in bad weather). I would not want to be trying to get around the popular spots in Skye in high summer.
It is big and the roads are small and windy. Don't expect to quickly see it all in a day.
Research places beyond the popular spots to avoid a crowded entry road (or turn up early and hope someone doesn’t block you in).
Finding dinner at short notice can also be a bit of a problem, the hours are short in many places and large chunks of the island (the north east especially) seem to only have a few high-end gourmet restaurants rather than just relaxed pubs.
--- Detailed Run-Down --- Day 1 - Switzerland to Stirling Landing in Edinburgh we took the long way in via Edinburgh Waverley, rather than going to an outer station. It was good to get another look at the city centre at least. Getting off to a British start with a tea and a sausage roll for a sack. The Edinburgh-Stirling line is nice but not stunning. You get a fairly good view of the Kelpies (horse heads statue) from the train, and a taste of the country to come from the hills in the distance. Stirling old-town is small but pretty. Almost more like a village at times. It was much quieter than Edinburgh tourist wise. We arrived at 1pm and were welcomed by drizzle (not heavy or cold at least). Lunch at the Blue lagoon chippy, very friendly, cheap and good too. Spent the afternoon at the castle which is an interesting mix of styles (various events have led the oldest parts from the more dramatic part of history to be replaced by more “modern” buildings). There are tours included in the price and bits of info, but knowing the basics of the history beforehand helps. We joined a tour which was celebrating a specific event and had a private tour as nobody else chose to join it. A highlight was the optimistic ice-cream man trying to sell luxury Scottish ice-cream in the . Only really had an afternoon in Stirling. So no time for Wallace Memorial or the Back Walk around the castle. Though a full day would have been enough to fit it all in. We stayed at the YHA in the old town (right up the hill). Very grand building from the outside, but it was much less fancy inside. Nice spot for a night. Dinner at the Spice lounge. Really good curry with giant naans. Day 2 - Stirling to Arrochar via loch Lomond We took a taxi out to collect a rental car. A big part of coming to Stirling was to pick-up the car in a quiet region. The Glasgow road site allowed us to get out into the small country roads with just a few simple roundabouts and after rush hour. Very nice taxi driver and staff. The expected weather had gone back and forth quite a bit, and so we had generated a fair few Ideas:
The Battle of Bannockburn Visitor Centre (directly by the car rental).
Dunblane Cathedral.
Glengoyne distillery.
Doune distillery and Doune “Monty Python” castle.
Luss
In the end we drove to Doune, admired the village (beautiful but tiny), and took breakfast at the very good Buttercup cafe which had a Saturday market. It was only a short walk to the castle (though having seen enough before we didn’t bother going in). We got talking to a local(ish) couple over breakfast who gave us the idea to head to Loch Lommand at Balmaha and take the boat over to the island of Inchcailloch. In the end the boat was not running due to high winds. A chat with the info centre brought up a few ideas. Including a 10km +/-300m hike up conic hill. Great views. Windy on/off rain. West highland mix of serious and stop off. I had Arrochar listed as a point of interest, though whether that was for scenic or historical reasons I am not sure. There are certainly very nice views along the loch and over to the Cobbler mountain formation. Arrochar on the other hand is not of interest in itself, a few cafes but otherwise just some houses strewn along the loch. We stayed at the Bespoke hotel. Kind of posh, but at the same time feeling a little worn and past its best without much character. It had worse WiFi than YHA or anywhere else that we visited in Scotland. There were not tempting options in Arrochar so we drove to the nearby Loch Lanj restaurant for dinner. The place itself was interesting being in an old church and was mostly a good choice. It was slightly ruined by the Saturday night entertainment who did a seemingly endless 1.5+hrs without a break. Day 3 - Arrochar to Skye This was the longest driving day. Which turned out to be much longer than expected. In retrospect this should have been 2 days with a night somewhere in the Fort William region. The scenery was stunning, but started to wear a bit and become less special by the time we reached Syke which was a shame. We had expected just under 4 hours of driving. But in the end it was more like 6 hours.
Stopped along Loch Lommand. Not many scenic lookout points. Most parking options are blocked in by trees from a view.
Stopped for tea at The Drovers Inn. An old and rather whimsical pub.
Stopped for coffee and scones at the Bridge of Orchy Hotel. In contrast to the Drovers this was very modern in style (still good).
The road was very impressive afterwards on the pass to Glencoe. The section around Altnafeadh was possibly the best part of the day. It felt a shame to only be able to see it in passing. It all felt so wild and empty. Especially compared to the endless farms and villages in Switzerland.
Fort William has nothing of interest beyond a few supermarkets.
We had thought to divert off to the Glenfinnan Viaduct (The Harry Potter train bridge) after Fort William, but dropped it as time was already pressing.
Lunch in the car park mid way along Loch Lochy.
Viewpoint at Loch Garry. The view to the west is noted for looking like the map of Scotland.
Eilean Donan Castle. We just arrived as heavy rain turned to sunshine which was rather nice. It was a good 5 minute stop to admire the building, but I wasn’t fussed to go in.
Driving over the bridge to Skye and onwards was pretty. But by this point it was all blending together after driving for too long.
We stayed the Spinning Wheel Pod in Dunvegan. A pod (basically a fancy shed) in the garden of the hosts, about 10 minutes walk out of the village centre. It was cosy but nice. The hosts were very friendly. The price was rather high all things considered (but we didn’t have many other options in the area as we booked late). The hosts were very friendly and helpful. The booking came with breakfast at the bakery in the village, but that only started when the bakery opened at the surprising hour of 10am. Dunvegan village itself is rather basic. It was not a bad base, but not somewhere to visit in itself. There are a few basic shops and cafes, but these are mostly closed after 3pm. There are not many options for food in the evening: almost anywhere closer than portree is expensive gourmet dinning. As the sun was setting we walked up to the standing stone which dominates the village (and turns out it was put there in 2000). Day 4 - Skye We had various ideas lined up of what to do on the island:
Whale / Dolphin watching.
Neist Point lighthouse (close to Dunvegan).
Coral Beach (close to Dunvegan).
Drive around the Trotternish peninsula (sticky out bit in the north east) with stops for the Quiraing, Old Man of Storr, and various smaller spots (eg: Mealtfalls, Brothers Point, Lealt Falls).
Something in the Cuillin, like the Fairy Pools.
However a forecast of heavy rain rather screwed much of that up. We took a late breakfast whilst considering the options in the rain. The first idea was a 30 minute drive to the Talisker Distillery in Carbost. Leaving the main road we met our first bit of single lane but plenty of passing spaces. There was however no chance of finding parking in the village. Locals were clearly annoyed at tourists, with endless signs informing you that the spots were for residents rather than visitors. As this was one of the few indoor sites on the island it was not a surprise (and I imagine it was probably rammed inside, so probably for the best that we didn’t get in). We headed on to Portree in the pouring rain, just getting the last parking spot in the large free section. Portree is useful as a base and source of shops, but isn’t that interesting in itself. The harbour side is nice enough but small and not that pretty as far as UK harbour villages go. It also felt a bit sad given how many other tourists were mouching around the gift shops hoping the rain would stop. Cullen Skink soup at the Lower Deck for lunch - very good and very suitable food for the day. Heading back to our lodgings to just relax and read we were surprised to see the weather start to pick up. We intended to drive a few minutes further to see Dunvegan Castle. But it was not in sight from the road, and the £14 entry was far too much to see a not overly special stately home (you get a decent enough view 3 minutes further down the road). We pressed on down the single-lane road to the Coral Beach as the weather seemed to be improving still. We got a spot to park, but even on a moody day like that there were not many spots free (or that many in total really). Walking for 30 minutes or so got us to the beach, which was indeed made of corals and did have some nice views. Dinner at the Old School House (having reserved earlier by phone). Very good and cheaper than anything else in that half of the island. Day 5 - Skye This day was predicted to be cloudy but with probable patches of rain. Not ideal but much better than the previous day. We headed out to Neist point for something to do before the free breakfast at 10am. It was a beautiful 45 minute or so drive (quiet to at 8am). The weather was not perfect, but it wasn’t raining and there was some visibility at least. The site at the end was rather basic: a little cafe hut and some parking (but surprisingly no toilets, which begs questions of what it is like in the summer with lots of people….). We walked down to the lighthouse and back up again. Back for 10am breakfast at the bakery. Free rolls and scones. The big goal for the day was the Trotternish loop (clockwise from Uig to Portree). After Uig the road turned to single lane until Stenscholl (and even after that changed to single lane a few times on the way to Portree). The traffic was never heavy and passing was always easy - though I did see some big tour buses which must have gone through at least some single lane sections which can’t be fun.
Skye Museum of Island Life.
Single Lane Coffee shop. Beautiful views, nice place, and good food/drink. But very limited parking and a tight squeeze through a narrow gate.
Parked at the car park by Loch Langaig and had lunch in the Quiraing (or what we could see of it anyway).
We didn't bother with pass road given the weather. Next time.
Kilt Rock and Mealt Waterfalls. Then the Lealt falls.
Old man of Storr. We attempted the walk, but gave up due to heavy rain. Amazing number of people totally unprepared for the weather. Some were walking down in soggy hoodys, jeans, and converse.
Dinner in Portree at the Isles Inn. Good but busy (like everywhere in Portree it seemed).
After a day of cloud and rain the sky of course was beautifully clear on the way back as the last bit of daylight went away. Day 6 Skye to Fort Augustus via Glenfinnan Our plan for the day was to drive down to the Armadale-Mallaig ferry then to Fort Augustus. The day started with heavy rain, but cleared up so there was mostly good visibility.
The initial ferry time was cancelled due to the weather the previous day, but the company made it very easy to quickly change to a later time.
From Harrapool down to Armadale was a nice drive on a very quiet part of the island
The process was very easy at ferry. Next to it was a tiny cafe and a few shops for a diversion (and a big enough dry and warm waiting room). Plus nice views over the bay.
The ferry ride itself was slow but scenic. Much more interesting than the bridge.
From Mallaig we followed the Road to the isles. Lunch on beach near Morar. But sadly no time for the alternative scenic route.
Beautiful drive to Glenfinnan. But not many stopping points to get out and admire the views.
A brief stop at Glenfinnan to see the viaduct. Though parking was crazy with people hiking in from kms down the roadside (turns out we turned up just before the steam train went by). Had an interesting chat with a lady who helped run the nearby church about the insanity of people fighting to see the train. The church itself (Church St Mary & St Finnan) was worth a look, it even had a stag hanging around in the bushes outside. I found the views of the loch and mountains better than the viaduct. Saw a few parking arguments from frustrated tourists.
A nice drive back up via Loch Lochy (again, but this time we a rainbow).
A number of swing bridges allow larger boats on the canal to pass the road. We caught a few of these which slowed us down, they were scenic spots for a wait at least.
We stayed at the Old Pier House. A fantastic place with an amazing lakeside location run by a very nice guy. It was secluded but just a short walk into the village. It also had a large chunk of land with horses and highland cows. We wished we had stayed longer. Fort Augustus itself is a nice village. Though it is a bit too twee and perfectly manicured along the central series of locks. We had good dinner at the Lock Inn and then wandered down to the far side of the Highland Club for views down the lake. Day 7 - Fort Augustus to Cairngorms Started the day with a walk of the grounds to find the highland cows and horses. Followed by breakfast watching the loch and horses on the lawn. We had two options: the main road going back to the south and then east, or scenic backroads cutting across to the north east. We went for the scenic drive along the B862 and B851, then a less scenic stretch of the A9 down to Aviemore, finally the Old Military Road.
Climbing up above the Loch we got to the lookout, but poor weather. Would be a good short hike to the summit otherwise.
Waterfalls Falls of Foyers. A short and nice walk (without any rain!).
Coffee at the The Camerons Tea Rooms and Farm Shop. Nice cafe. Deer outside.
Drive on. Nice scenic drive. Not many options for parking to start a hike though.
Caringorm Reindeer centre. The paddock at the visitor centre really isn't much for the asking price (a few reindeer and some information signs). But the Reindeer Walk was well worth it: nice views and experience to be among the reindeer and feed them (plus it also includes the paddock).
Drive on via back roads to the Old Military Road. These were mostly single lane but fun and scenic, at the Old Military Road it was 2 lanes again. Changing landscape from fertile valley to high barren mountain pass, and back again.
We stayed at the Howe of Torbeg - basically glamping sheds. The site was very nicely done, quiet, and with great views. Again we wished we had stayed here longer (and will do a tour of the east coast and area in more depth sometime). Drove 5 mins further to Ballater for dinner. It is a very handsome village, and being the closest to Balmoral most of the shops seem to have royal appointments. Good dinner at the Lochnagar Indian Brasserie to make a change from the pub food. Day 8 - to Edinburgh
Breakfast at Ballater
Drove past Balmoral, but were too early to visit.
Beautiful drive. Past ski area then down into lush valleys.
Joining “bigger” roads but still easy driving.
Returned car. Train to Edinburgh.
Stayed at Piries Hotel by Haymarket. Convenient location for access to the city and catching an early flight. Wouldn't bother again otherwise. Very creaky bed. From the hotel it was an easy 10 minute walk down to Dean Village. Pretty but small, not much to do there other than admire the buildings for 5 minutes though. We followed the river walk along to Stockbridge, and then went up through new town, into the old town. Japanese food at Hakataya (very good but small and very popular so reserve ahead). Walking back through the streets and squares of the new town is a very nice way to end the day. Day 9 - Edinburgh We spent more time here previously Sunshine and no rain at last on the very final day (the following week was sunshine all the way, bastards). Southern cross cafe for breakfast. Nipping into the National library to see what books they had in the shop. Coffee at the Maison de Moggy cat cafe (an amusing novelty but not something I would bother with again). Bus 42 to Duddingston (very slow, not helped by traffic due to road works). I had hoped from the map that this would be a little rustic village (as much as one can be this close to central Edinburgh), this was the case to an extent but I wouldn’t go back just for the village itself. Very good pub lunch at the Sheep Heid Inn. From Duddingston we headed directly into Holyrood Park and up to Arthurs Seat. From this side it was a steep but quiet climb. The peak itself was very busy, almost comically rammed with people really. We chose to spend most of the time on the neighbouring peak of Nether Hill, sacrificing a bit of the view for more space and peace. From either peak you get a nice view for a city and surrounding area. Though mostly the view is of the suburbs rather than old town (Calton hill is better for the old town). It is nice that it is there but I wouldn’t call the view from the top a must-see. We took the stairs down and then the Volunteers Walk across to Holyrood palace for a quick look at the palace and parliament before catching a bus back up into the old town. There are a few spots I missed out on in Edinburgh:
The Tiles pub
Surgeon museum
Curry house - Omar Khayyam
Day 10 Edinburgh to Switzerland Early flight. First tram at 5:30am to the airport. Security line was the worst I have seen in years. Apparently it is always bad first thing on a Sunday morning.
Virtual Reality helped my wife live and continues to save my own life daily. (Thank you Devs)
I posted this over two years ago https://www.reddit.com/oculus/comments/6cisb1/rift_as_my_only_display_living_v What a lot of people did not know is my wife was dying at the time here is her last day. https://imgur.com/gallery/JSggx0v Almost 21 years unable to leave the house most days gaming was her life, while the real world took away her ability to walk, live without pain and even sleep, gaming allowed us to share worlds together, much of her last year was spent in VR, mainly the Oculus CV1, Vive and for the time in hospital Gear VR, worlds that made so much more sense than a world where a 21 year old is told "Either the cancer is going to kill you or the treatment". Before her death she got to create worlds in Minecraft, explore all the places she was too ill in Google earth VR, Walk the streets of Whiterun, battle dragons, loot dungeons and furnish houses in SkyrimVR. For the above I will always be grateful. I have no family, 7 days after she died I was diagnosed with bowel cancer and spent that Christmas in hospital 3 monthly checks on a nodule in my lungs that may or may not turn cancerous, I suffer from Bipolar type 2 effective disorder, ADHD, Depression, Grief and PTSD. Leaving the house is not an option, and no one has visited me in 12 months accept my sister visited me on my birthday and I went for a Christmas dinner. My days are my own filled with a silence that is deafening only broken by time spent with my dogs. But when things are really bad, when the real world makes no sense at all, when the depression takes hold and my reasoning boils down to "if I end it all now, either some religion is right and I will be with Paola and thus not in pain anymore OR this is all we have and if I end it all now then the pain stops", I pick up my Vive Pro, I walk the streets of Skyrim and battle ancient foes, I use my laser swords and dance really badly in Beatsaber, I destroy evil fruit in FruitninjaVR and shoot zombies in the head, I turn on Google Earth VR and walk the streets of places while talking to Paola as if she is with me marveling at the architecture. For the many worlds of VR make far more sense to me with Magic, Dragons and Zombies than the world when I remove my HMD. My current plan is to save up for a Valve Index (my Vive pro has seen better days) and get back to doing more VR on my channel. Gaming and VR especially for some one who has problems or disabilities is amazing and more than words. ----- Update 1 I wanted to explain how to me at least games help with depression, panic attacks and general situation overload. Let us look at panic attacks, now anyone who has had a real panic attack knows it is no joke, it can have very real affects on your body and mine comes from being alone and 20 years of looking after a Wife with cancer and now having nodules in my lungs. When I feel one coming on I have a couple of things, that really seem to reset my brain, one is a save game I have in SkyrimVr just before a huge Dragon fight, 10-30 minutes using natural locomotion, running, dodging, hiding, throwing lightning, switching to bow, screaming like a girl as the damn dragon lands on my head and lydia is no where to be found. Playing a creepy non jump scare horror game, multiple ones that sort of slowly ramp up the sound and feeling of dread. Those two for me sort of reset my brain and I can always take the HMD off and things laugh while trying to catch my breath. Bipolar type 2 means I spend most of my time at a low ebb depression with mania spikes into hyper. When I am feeling down most VR games help, completing a quest, exploring a dungeon, climbing to the top of a mountain, dodging lightning bolts, shooting zombies a lot! Your brain becomes immersed you are not just playing a game you are there, you have a gun spell sword in your hand you can make a difference effect the world and win, for that Dragon fight you are actually within the fight it is real and you are kicking ass. Update 2: I am hesitant to give out my Youtube/twitch because then this looks like self promotion and it wasn't meant in that way. Plus my channels are a mess at the moment, did a huge rework of my living room trying to turn it into what it should be a "living" room, have my gaming/streaming pc, hotas, wheel, vr, retro pie, xbox one x, ps4, only just all coming together. Rebuilt my PC with a new motherboard, slowly reinstalling all my VR and gaming stuff. Did two test streams today the first failed because of a Vive Pro crash and the second was me just goofing around on SkyrimVR to see if my mod list was stable. Last couple of weeks videos have been more to do with the wuhan situation than gaming but now my system is all back working, I will get back to gaming more. If anyone does want my YT message me and I will give it out but be warned it is a real mess. Update 3: Someone else linked my channel can mods change this post flare to self promotion I will be doing a SkyrimVR stream in about 10 minutes this has motivated me to install my missing camera. https://www.twitch.tv/quebber update 4: Thank you to everyone, I admit when writing this I was having a low day, not a truly bad day but I managed to sell a lot of items in the house over the last 2 months, (items I will never use 117 balls of wool) set money aside for the index, then murphy's law kicked in, Ice maker fails (I don't drink tea, coffee or alcohol my only drink luxury is ice water with juice) so money went on that. Then *shakes head* One of my prized possessions a 4K 55" TV center of the entertainment center (used to be Paola's TV/Monitor, the distance from her medical support chair to the TV meant it was like a 28" monitor close up) died, I thought it was the back lighting so I spent money on a lighting kit but seems the main board went boom (it was 3 years old) not a big issue, I moved the 47" 1080p from upstairs to take its place (it actually works out really well), this motivated me to hook up all my game systems and install retropie on my raspberry pi 3b+. Here is Paola's old room (the living room) now I have also fully tweaked it and setup for my main space to live/game in except for sleep and food. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f3DRT_PIpY4 My vive pro is a little finicky, bought it when it came out just the HMD and paired it with V1 light boxes and wands, the mic dies often, the sound cuts out or goes full on radio static. I did have a backup pc with VR and a backup backup pc, but I heard of the son of a neighbor who had never had a gaming computer, put together a pc for him for Christmas (ryzen 1300 + 970 gtx), my sister came to see me on my birthday thus I decided to put together a VR system for her and husband at Christmas. (Rift CV1). Do not like tech being around if it could make someone happy. I am use to budgeting very slowly and patient, use to duct taping things together until funds are available, for example last year an amazing follower donated an i7-8700K and 32gb ram (he had just upgraded to a 9900K) I bought the cheapest of the cheap motherboard and just this month budgeted enough to buy a better one). Most of my equipment is refurbished and self fixed I learnt that trait while Paola was alive so that I could always make sure she had items that she wanted. The index is going to wait a little while. would love to play Half Life Alyx with the knuckle controllers. Now to reply to all the messages and commends. This has really been a boost to me. ------ Update 5: Later I will be doing a Beatsaber stream later, should be hilarious, a 6ft 2" overweight 49 year old with no rhythm and due to the autism I have to turn all the "make it so easy even I might not fail" on, (if I miss a cut my brain sort of has a car wreck moment and I can't do anything for 20-30 seconds) but it should be a laugh. BTW this isn't me being self depreciative I like to make others smile and laugh and boy am I crazy bad at some of this stuff. Paola taught me to be happy and focus on what you have not what you don't. ----- Update 6: What would be my dream game in VR? A game like skyrim, modable so you could tweak it to yourself, open world but with a true VR interface, grab a chair and pull it out to sit, turn a handle to open a door, pull the clothes and items of a corpse, pick up weapons and read tomes for spells and throw fireballs, furnishing a house actually putting things on shelves. ----- Update 7: Beatsaber Stream will start in 5 minutes, never done this before and only started playing a couple of days ago. Notes: I don't have any fancy camera setup, avatar or anything like that raw is an understatement. I am severely overweight although since starting doing VR again and especially active games like gorn and Skyrim, I have lost 5kg, dieting as such is a no go especially in case my bowel cancer comes back or the nodules in my lungs change (first thing to go is appetite with chemo). My brain gets easily overwhelmed due to my problems, I turn on all of the easy mode and even then I can get total train wrecked. But, and this is the important point, if I can do this then hopefully it will make a few people smile and inspire others to have a go. I should be able to see chat in game. Update 8: Well it seems like Beatsaber does work fine for me was a lot of fun with people on the channel, then we did some Assassins Creed Odyssey to give my HMD a rest (and me damn can Beatsaber wear you out) then SkyrimVR. it is 2am, I am just about ready for bed. Thank you everyone, I don't think people realise just how nice it is to have a connection like this. ---- Update 9: Morning everyone, I hope all is well, people have suggested a gofundme to pay for a Valve Index, thank you but my experience with gofundme well I did 2 gofundme in the past, one before Paola died, I want to buy a small canal boat and take her on trips this was when we knew things were going bad and death was a very real possibility, and then when I was diagnosed with Bowel cancer and wanted to buy a gaming laptop to keep myself busy in hospital. On Reddit and the internet in general there is a small negative group who either believe everyone is a karma whore, or actively want to watch the world burn, I got reported to the UK benefits agency (yeah I got audited while dealing with Paola's dialysis and all that this was 14 months before Paola died) they found nothing wrong but it was a level of stress I did not need. The second group used stolen credit cards to put money into my gofundme which 8 weeks later gofundme removed from my bank account and put me in debt. At that point I deleted the gofundme's and my youtube channel has a paypal donation address but please understand no matter what I am okay, I have to budget for everything, I can't even buy a game unless I spend time working it out in my budget. There is people a lot worse off than me. I will be doing a beatsaber live stream in about an hour, I have already uploaded my daily vlog. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gkqBeRS9Cbk&feature=youtu.be Which today covers the medical term obs and why people should do that for themselves and family. Update 10: Okay Beatsaber stream starting in 5 minutes 20 minutes late because my Vive Pro had issues, read that as first time I started SteamVR all I got was sound static, second time mic stopped working but sound was fine, third time mic and sound fine but steamvr home refused to load, Now it is all working! (my computer, drivers and all that stuff is updated this has just been an ongoing issue since 1-2 months after warranty ended, tested on multiple computers over the last 6 months same issues, I just think it is dying a slow death. Just because someone might try to trouble shoot this for me, what has been tried, custom usb power profile, multiple secondary USB cards, Tested with both 1080ti and 2070RTX, tested with laptop and primary PC, new motherboard and multiple other things, my though is some internal damage on the Vive Pro. Now lets play some Skyrim and get chased by dragons.! Update 10: Okay someone mentioned in the comments that this looks like a con, yeah erm well as I have stated over and over, I am fine slowly budgeting for things, happy to save up, I was more explaining why I won't be playing Half life Alyx on launch and what happened to my Valve index budget due to things breaking around the house. Kinda Proof of who I am and my story. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEsu0RHpDSU&feature=youtu.be Update 11: Beat saber is amazing, not only for exercise but something about it really appeals to that higher functioning autism side, the Bipolar and the ADHD, I have to turn off directional cuts, slow down some of the music and only certain songs do not cause a train wreck in my head, but those songs that gel with my brain its like the best mellow buzz ever, it is not even how fast the song is, one of my Favourite is Derezz by daft punk (tron legacy) that song throws cubes at you faster than any song I have tried but the order just seems to work. Update 12: Thanks to the response here I started a new vlog series on my youtube channel specifically about how VR helps with mental illness, as with everything I do it will be unedited and apocalyptic dog barking can happen. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hc-PO1KUST4&list=PLzyMhxpKvudfiS4Bd1fx1f-nlvkwzGAPR Update 13: I believe the next game that deserves talking about in relation to therapy will be Google Earth VR, I did my video on Skyrim and how it helps with my problems today, Doing this series is bringing back all the different ways that I remember VR was such a communal thing between me and Paola. we spent like 6 hours between us in Google Earth VR on the first day, then the entire rest of the night talking about all the places we visited.
“A shocking turn of events at Wayne Manor as it’s revealed that former ward of Bruce Wayne Dick Grayson has moved to adopt a sixteen year old orphan.” The voice of GCN personality Vesper Fairchild buzzed on the television screen. “What do you have to say to this, Hal?” Vesper readjusted her spectacles as she shifted in her seat. She tucked her short, brown hair behind her ears and turned to her co-caster, Hal Lake. “Well, the most shocking factor is that Grayson himself is barely pushing 30.” The younger newscaster held an empty coffee mug between his hands. “I mean, sure, the family is wealthy beyond imagination, but it takes a certain amount of worldly wisdom to be a father. I’d know!” “That you would, Hal. You take good care of your boys!” Vesper turned back to face the camera. “But with the press, and other inquisitive Americans surrounding Wayne Manor awaiting the young girl’s arrival, we have to ask: What’s really going on here?” From the drawing room of the ancestral home of the Wayne family, Dick Grayson wasn’t paying much attention to the news report on the TV behind him. Instead, he glanced through a crack in the drawn curtains onto the front grounds of the manor. He watched the paparazzi swarming the far gate as they surrounded and accosted the black limousine that inched through. Behind the wheel was Alfred - butler, head of security, and homemaker - with a special passenger on board. Dick sighed and leaned back from the bay window. He looked back into the house. After the months of hard work and jumping through government hoops to make this happen, the day was finally here. Stephanie was the daughter of Arthur Brown, the Penguin henchmen Dick had teamed up with to bring down Oswald Cobblepot. And while Penguin now sat squarely behind bars, dead to rights, that was only after he put a bullet in Arthur’s head for his betrayal, with Stephanie held close at hand to watch. Dick had promised Arthur that Stephanie would have a good life, and he intended to make good on that promise. A lot of work had been done to get things ready for Stephanie’s arrival. Workmen had been in to renovate one of the spare bedrooms, the mansion had been cleaned from top-to-bottom, and Jason had already started on one of his signature roast dinners. All was going well and according to plan, and - other than Kate, who endlessly pursued the remainder of Penguin’s forces - they had all hands on deck. With hesitation, Dick joined Jason, Helena and Betty in the foyer, the large wooden front door looming before them. The door cracked open and, as it swung, the cacophonous cries of the news media erupted through it. In charged Alfred in his black suit, sheltering a young girl who dragged a large suitcase behind her. Then, Alfred heaved the large door shut and the raving paparazzi were silent once more. “Miss Brown, you’ve already met Mister Grayson,” Alfred began. “But I’d like to introduce you Miss Helena, Master Jason and Miss Betty.” Stephanie had long, wavy blonde hair. She stood 5’6”, around Helena’s height, in denim shorts, a green top and a green plaid shirt. In her off-hand she clutched at her cell phone. She moved away from Alfred, standing by herself and set her suitcase down. She was exhausted and overstimulated, not at all used to the media attention she had just experienced. Dick stepped forward and smiled. “We’ve tried our best to get things ready for you, Stephanie. I hope you can begin to feel as at home as you can.” “Sure thing,” Stephanie replied. “And don’t worry, you don’t have to try so hard with me.” Leaving her suitcase where it fell, Stephanie pushed forward, moving between Betty and Jason and approaching the master staircase. “Where’s my room?” “Excuse me?” Helena cocked her head, confused. Stephanie stopped halfway up the stairs and turned to face her hosts. “You guys don’t care about me. You’ve had a shitty year, the city thinks you’re assholes, so you’re taking in a scared, innocent orphan off the streets to get some good publicity.” Dick blinked, utterly stunned. He didn’t even realise their public image was that bad. Betty stepped forward and laughed nervously. “Stephanie… I don’t think that’s what’s going on here.” But Stephanie just smiled and shook her head. “Oh, I don’t mind. This whole deal? It’s too good to be true. Kids like me don’t just get adopted by billionaires.” Jason shrugged. “Kids like us did.” “I don’t know what to tell you,” Stephanie continued. “All I’m saying is that I’ve had a shit life. Mom died of cancer. Dad got shot. As long as there’s food on the table and a decent college fund in it for me, I’m happy to smile on cue and go on Good Morning Gotham and tell everyone how incredible you guys are.” Jason looked to Dick, stunned and searching for a response. Dick stepped forward, “Stephanie, I’m sorry but--” “Can one of you please just show me to my room,” she interrupted him. “It’s been a long… couple of months.” Silently, Alfred nodded and - taking her suitcase - joined Stephanie on the stairs.
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Kate Kane stared at herself in the mirror. Her purse was on the floor, a box of chocolates and a book inside, both for Maggie Sawyer - her old flame and Dick’s police partner. She would go see her in a moment. For now she was focused on the fatigue in her eyes, something she caught just before leaving the bathroom. She dropped her purse, ran the faucet and splashed some cold water into her face. Then, looking back at her was the face of Batwoman. A mask over her face that meant she lived to protect. To do what others weren’t capable of doing. At least, that’s what she always thought. But she couldn’t even do that. A realisation was growing in the back of her mind that she couldn’t let come to the forefront anytime soon: the realisation that she couldn’t save everyone. The realisation that she could fail, no matter how hard she tried. Kate clenched her eyes shut. Even if she’d fail she could get revenge. She could send Black Spider - the son of a bitch who broke Maggie’s legs when she tried to arrest his employer the Penguin - where he belonged. She opened her eyes and saw herself looking back. Those tired eyes from before. The pale face of a woman who was losing a grip on what she stood for, on what she could do for others. But, right now, she could only be herself. She could only be Kate Kane. All she could do was be there for Maggie, a woman she was lucky to have, alive. Someone who could hold things in balance just a bit better than Kate could alone. Kate went through the process of checking in and was led up to Maggie’s hospital room. They hadn’t been able to see each other much over the past few months. For good reason. Maggie’s legs had been decimated. Such pain… Kate had experienced plenty of pain in her life. But a pain like this she couldn’t even begin to imagine. Kate was there when it happened. Maggie’s shin bones had been completely snapped in half. The screams were brief but they sent tremors down Kate’s body. For a moment Kate thought Maggie had died from the injury, the way her body went limp, how suddenly her screams had fallen away from her mouth. But Maggie survived. She couldn’t see her during the hospital trip, nor during the surgeries and treatments. The first time Kate saw her, Maggie’s face was pale as a sheet of paper. The skin of her legs that showed above the casts and wraps were the most purple Kate had ever seen on flesh. She couldn’t speak to her then. She was completely out cold, machines monitoring her breathing, giving her proper hydration. But now, Maggie was awake. Bedridden. She had her phone so she texted Kate letting her know that she was allowed visitors and Kate immediately scheduled a visit to the hospital. And now, she stood in the doorway, seeing Maggie sitting up further in bed, gazing out the window. Her legs vanished within the confines of massive casts and bands. They were each raised in traction, her body reclined just a bit to make herself comfortable. She slowly turned and smiled at Kate. “Hey you,” Maggie said. Her eyes moved from Kate down to her legs. There was a certain sadness in her face despite her smile. Her gaze lingered on the casts. With a sigh she said, “Never thought I’d know what it’s like to lose feeling in something I use everyday.” She gave a sniff, one of acknowledgement. “You really don’t know what you have until it’s gone.” She glanced over at Kate. While Kate knew Maggie’s predicament was the most important thing in the room right now, she could see Maggie’s double meaning in that statement. Her look solidified it. And Kate had often felt the same about the two of them. Kate gave her a soft smile in return. They had both messed up in the past. But now, there was a sliver of hope for Maggie’s recovery. And Kate wanted to be there for her every step of the way. Because, for the first time in a while, it seemed like nothing was gone. Everything just might be coming together. Kate walked over to the bedside and pulled out her gifts. Maggie’s face lit up - Kate could never understand her love for mystery thrillers, they were all so generic - but it made her happy to see her happy. “Oh, you are the best.” Maggie took the book and flipped it over scanning the backside blurb. “This is the new release.” Her eyes glanced away a moment. “I’m… surprised you remembered I like this series.” Kate sat down in the chair facing the bed and handed her the chocolates as well. “How could I forget? When the subject of books came up you talked my ear off about it when we--” Kate had been reminiscing without noticing. She paused. “When we started walking back to my apartment. On our first date.” Maggie laughed. “And you put up with every bit of it. I remember really liking that about you.” Kate grinned. “The first mark of a suitable partner: whether or not they can put up with your bullshit interests.” They both laughed. And then Maggie looked down at the box of chocolates and ran her thumbnail across the plastic covering. “They say my chances are good. Seventy percent chance I’ll be able to walk at least with assistance, including a smaller chance I’ll be able to without.” She paused. “But odds are I’ll never make a full recovery, the force will never take me back for active duty.” Kate wanted to say something to that. Couldn’t think of anything. The surgeon, Dr Elliot had already told her as much privately, but the sheer look of depression on Maggie’s face left her lost for words. Her next thought was to take Maggie’s hand but… that just didn’t seem right. Not right now. So, all Kate could think to say was “I’m so sorry.” It was such a useless thing. But it helped that Maggie nodded, as if it was acceptable at the very least. Maggie continued. “If the force ever takes me back, I’ll either be stuck at a desk, or a liability…” “You can’t think about that right now,” Kate said. “How can I not?” “Because--” Kate breathed. “Because. Having a chance is something people dream of having. You’re getting the best care available. You will walk again.” Maggie frowned. To Kate’s surprise she held out her hand. Her heart skipped a beat seeing her do it. “Will you visit me more often, Kate?” She closed her eyes. Kate could see it was hard for her to admit what she was about to. “I feel… I feel so alone in this. I don’t know what to do.” Kate took Maggie’s hand and squeezed it tight. “Only if you share some of that chocolate with me,” Kate teased. Maggie laughed and squeezed her hand back. Kate watched her smile, the way she clenched her eyes shut whenever she genuinely let out a hearty laugh. Kate admired her. Probably always would. If anything… she would be a friend. It was the least she could do. And it was something she wanted more than anything else right then. “I’ll be here with you as much as I can,” Kate said. “You’re not alone.”
Kate stayed with Maggie a long while. They chatted about some stories they had both missed out on in each other’s lives, about how Kate was doing. They ate chocolate and made fun of a nonsense reality show. She couldn’t stay forever though, as much as she wanted to. She kept glancing over at her legs; even though Maggie’s career prospects were seriously bleak, it didn’t mean she wasn’t lucky. If she were anyone else, anyone with fewer opportunities, fewer chances, she would have lost her legs entirely. If she was anyone with less willpower she could have died. And the person who did this to her was still out there. The bastard who did this might do it to someone else. Kate might not have been able to save everyone. But what she could do was stop one person. If she focused. If she worked. Kate and Maggie hugged one another. She promised she would visit again before her next surgery. She gathered her purse and left the room, and she did so, she wasn’t Kate Kane any longer. She was a hunter. An avenger. She would find Black Spider - pursue every lead she had - and make him pay.
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Dick Grayson stood alone out the back of the mansion, looking off over the green acres of land, through the pristinely kept gardens. Even as everything had fallen into disarray over the last two years, he’d made sure to keep the gardens in good condition. He remembered when he first arrived at the manor as a boy, how Alfred had led him through the gardens. It was maintaining those topiaries and flora that kept him grounded the first few months, and though nowadays they paid gardeners to do the job, he still took pride in the view. But all wasn’t well, far from it. After some time, another figure joined Dick at his side: Betty Kane. On leave from the covert UN task force the Blackhawks, Betty was slowly getting more comfortable back at Wayne Manor, having previously never turned back after Bruce fired her as Batgirl years ago. She had returned to support Kate, her cousin, upon learning she was operating as Batwoman, and had stayed longer following the tragedy that befell Detective Sawyer. Now, with Penguin behind bars, but Black Spider still out there, how long Betty would remain in Gotham was unclear. “How are you holding up?” Betty stood by Dick’s side.They were kids when they dated, not even close to old enough to know what love was, but after Betty had left his life so suddenly, having her back made Dick realise how much he had felt her absence in the intervening years. “I’m not sure how to feel, to be honest,” Dick spoke, exasperated. In the back of his mind, he was frustrated, angry, but he knew better than to blame Stephanie for thinking something was amiss. “What do you think of her?” “The girl’s a snot-nosed bitch,” Betty replied plainly, pulling her black jacket tight to combat the crisp wind. “And she doesn’t know how lucky she is.” “No,” Dick shook his head, correcting her. “Stephanie knows exactly how lucky she is. That’s the problem: It’s too good to be true.” Dick stopped and looked at Betty. He thought back to the days when he first arrived at Wayne Manor, fresh off the death of his parents. “When Bruce took me in… I didn’t get it. Bruce Wayne was a playboy, the most eligible bachelor in the city, in the prime of his life. Why would he adopt a kid, especially one from a travelling circus? All the tabloids figured a kid would get in the way of his lifestyle, and it did.” “So that’s what you’re doing then?” Betty prodded him. “Scouting a new Robin from the local orphanage?” “No, no,” Dick protested. “Bruce didn’t even adopt me to make me his sidekick. That was my choice. I snuck out of the house at nights by myself to hunt for justice for my parents, to find Tony Zucco. Nearly got myself killed until Batman swooped in and stopped me. Then Bruce told me the truth, I think to get me to stop playing renegade. He promised to help me bring in Zucco, to make sure I was safe. Then after he was behind bars, Bruce agreed to train me… and I took the oath.” “The whole handle thing?” Betty asked. “’I swear to fight against crime and corruption’ and all that? Bruce had me take that oath too.” “In the earliest days, before I knew Bruce’s secret, God, the manor was pretty much empty most nights,” Dick continued. “Bruce Wayne was hardly an attentive parent, and I figured he was off at some nightclub every night. Then, I really didn’t get it. Why adopt a kid if you weren’t gonna spend any time with him?” “No wonder the tabloids speculated,” Betty replied. “At least Stephanie will have no shortage of company.” “Sure, except for when there’s a late night whole family excursion,” Betty rolled her eyes. Dick squirmed where he stood. “Look, I know it’s not perfect, but I promised her father she’d be looked after, kept safe. I can’t break that promise.” Betty stirred as Dick glanced off. Slowly, she placed a hand on his shoulder. Dick had always been mature beyond his years, even as a child crimefighter in green, scaly shorts. It gave him wisdom and stability, a reason Betty was attracted to him in her youth, but it also gave him a heavy burden. “Maybe… it’d be easier to give Stephanie what she needs if… there’s more adults around the house than just you and Alfred. Adults that don’t wear capes.” Dick turned back to her, surprised. He always assumed she held some resentment for Dick, as many seemed to do, because Bruce pushed her out and kept him close. Apparently, he was wrong. “I… No, you have the Blackhawks, that’s a lot of responsibility.” “And I’ve been saving my vacation days,” Betty grinned, inching closer. “It’s important work, but it’s lonely work. Besides… it’s not a full time job anyway.” Dick stared into her gleaming blue eyes. “Lots of downtime…” Dick pulled himself back and back to task. This wasn’t about him or his happiness. “I didn’t trust Bruce until I knew who he really was,” he spoke. Betty frowned softly and stepped back, slightly embarrassed. Dick continued, “I tried to run away more times than I could count. We can only expect the same from Stephanie unless we’re honest.” “Well…” Betty replied, still recovering, “You can’t tell Stephanie the truth unless you’re ready for her to demand a cape and a mask and some help getting her revenge. Look where it got you and Jason, and me with my aunt Kathy.” Dick shook his head. “No, we already brought Penguin to justice.” “That doesn’t mean she isn’t angry.”
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Councilwoman Noctua’s newest gathering was a splendid event, marked by the jewels on women's necks, the glass chandeliers hanging from the ceiling, and the waiters milling about, serving drinks to all who attended the gathering. Noctua herself walked amongst her privileged guests, flanked by her bodyguard as she conversed with her esteemed peers, jubilating in her accomplishments and reveling in the self-indulgent circlejerk of rich men and women complimenting each other. Kate had seen it all before, and she’d rather not stake this kind of party out from the inside again. Anchored to the side of the tower and listening in on the party, Batwoman peered in from the outside, keeping an eye on the bodyguard she had recognised and photographed at the last election event. His general build and posture were similar to the assassin Black Spider, too similar for her to ignore. If this guy really was the one who hurt Maggie, then she had to find out for sure. Watching him mill about next to Noctua, she noticed his hand drifting down into his pocket, slipping his phone out as he glanced at the screen. Raising an eyebrow, the bodyguard leaned into Noctua’s ear, whispering something to her before she nodded in response. Breaking off from his client, the bodyguard shuffled out to a lonely balcony separate from the party, where Kate could hear him more clearly. Pulling out his phone, the bodyguard dialed a number before bringing it up to his ear, letting it ring for a few seconds before someone answered. “You wanted to talk?” said the bodyguard, seemingly listening to the person on the other end, “No I just… I thought you were still out of the country. Tonight? That’s...a good time. Meet me at my safehouse, Ellen Street, apartment complex across from the pizza place, Room 12. I’ll be there once this gala’s over.” Hanging up, the bodyguard returned to the party, leaving Kate with a new place to go. Turning her head outward towards the dark and stormy clouds forming over the city, Kate decided knew exactly what to do next. Spreading her cape, Kate leapt from the building and glided further into the heart of the city. She’d find out who this guy was, for Maggie.
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Stephanie continued unpacking her clothes from the large suitcase that lay flat on her new bed. That was all she had to call her own, shirts, hoodies, jeans and shorts. That was the way of the poorest of Gotham; they didn’t have the luxury of having possessions. But that was about to change. Stephanie looked about the room the butler had led her to: newly renovated, a queen-sized bed, curtains adorned with excessive intricacies, a large wooden dresser and a looming wardrobe. And while Stephanie had never been the criminal her father was, she couldn’t help but pace the room and price up everything that wasn’t bolted down. She had entered a new life: one of luxury, of having all of her needs met. But why? She hadn’t done anything to earn this, she hadn’t clawed her way out of her circumstances tooth and nail, she had been arbitrarily plucked out of poverty. To many it would have been a dream come true, but Stephanie knew better than to blindly accept suspicious happenings in Gotham City. So her dad had gotten himself killed helping the police take down the Penguin? Did his death mean she’d earned a ticket to the upper echelon? Or was it - like Stephanie had accused - a circus act like the one Dick Grayson grew up in, meant to distract the media from the Wayne family’s dodgy dealings? As Stephanie spiralled, she heard a soft knock at the door. She stopped, hooking a clothes hanger into the towering wardrobe, and looked to the door. She said nothing but the door inched open anyway. In crept Helena Wayne, Bruce Wayne’s biological child, born into this life. That meant that, of all of the frauds that had greeted Stephanie, Helena could relate to her the least. “Hey, do you… need any help unpacking?” Helena spoke. The look of anger and vitriol from her face earlier was washed away. She now only looked nervous. “The butler’s been more than enough help,” Stephanie replied. “His name’s Alfred, but… yeah,” said Helena, moving beyond the door and into the room. “Well, do you want to talk?” Stephanie scoffed and threw herself down onto the bed, sitting on its cushioned edge. With a sarcastic grin, she patted the space beside her. “Well, sure! I’d be thrilled to play sisters!” Instantly, Helena snapped, and her look of exasperated disdain was back. “Look, Dick actually wants to help you. We all do. But it’ll be a lot harder on all of us if you put so much energy into--” Helena caught herself with a deep breath, but the damage was done. Stephanie cocked her head. “Into what? Into being a bitch?” Stephanie stared Helena down, who had no response. “You don’t want to help me. You want to help yourselves just as much as I want to help myself. Just as my dad wanted to help himself and not me with all his shady business.” “That’s not true.” “You act like it’s noble, but I know it costs you peanuts to take me in,” Stephanie frowned, standing up from the bed. “And you get more than your money’s worth in good PR out of it.” “I don’t care about how the media sees me,” Helena shook her head. “I’ve grown up under public scrutiny, I’ve dealt with worse.” “Have you? Seems to me that you care an awful lot about how they see your pop, Bruce Wayne.” Stephanie stepped forward. “You all lied about his death to protect the company, and you only came clean when his reputation was at stake. I do watch the news, everyone’s thinking it.” Helena dug her heels in. Stephanie was scared and angry about things she couldn’t control, Helena knew this. She wasn’t going to give her the fight she was spoiling for. “Sure,” she said plainly, a tear welling in her eye. “And now he’s dead. So us taking care of your ungrateful ass won’t do much for him now, will it?” And with those words, Helena stormed out, leaving the door ajar behind her. Stephanie went to take a deep breath as her adrenaline pumped, but it wasn’t enough. Instead, she went back to the bed and threw her fists down, digging them into the comforter. She wanted nothing more to cry, but she still hadn’t been able to since she watched her dad die. She grabbed the pillow and pulled it close, pressing her nose deep into it, and screamed a muffled scream. Moments later, another voice sounded. A young man. “Everything okay?” Stephanie threw herself to her feet and whipped around to face Jason Todd. She was in no mood. “You guys formed a line out there!?” Jason bowed his head. “No, I’m sorry. Helena can be a bit of a princess sometimes.” His face was soft, framed by his dark auburn hair. He was muscular, more so than DIck and approaching a similar height too. If it weren’t for his baby face, Stephanie would have a hard time believing Jason was so much younger than Dick. And, faced with Jason’s comment on Helena, Stephanie couldn’t help but laugh. “Are you kidding? I was a total bitch to her just now.” “Yeah,” Jason shrugged. “And I’d be the same in your shoes. I was.” Stephanie said nothing but cocked her head slightly. “Bruce adopted me right as Dick was getting ready to go off to college,” Jason explained. “He took me in off the streets, gave me everything I could ever want, and I still couldn’t help but feel like I was just Dick Grayson’s replacement.” “Your parents were dead acrobats too?” “If they were, they did a good job of hiding it,” Jason stifled a laugh. “Your dad worked for Penguin? Mine worked for Two-Face. Ended up getting him killed too, along with my mom and my sister. I got out.” Now Stephanie felt like an asshole. “I’m… sorry.” “It’s okay,” Jason smiled heavily. “It was years ago. And I have these guys now, for better and for worse.” Stephanie smiled. “So you’re saying I better start worrying if I find out you’re off to college soon, then?” she joked. Jason edged further into the room. “Oh, I can promise you I am not, despite everything pressuring me to. I’ve got a good enough career path laid out for me here in Gotham, where I am now.” Stephanie softened slightly for the first time since she had arrived. “Well, unlike everyone else, I hope you do stick around. You’ll make all of this way more bearable.” “I’m glad,” Jason nodded. Then, he turned and moved to leave, wrapping his hand around the inside edge of the door. But he stopped and turned back for a moment. “Please just… give them a chance.They’re a lot, but they’re good people.” Jason went to leave again, but Stephanie this time stopped him. “To be clear, I’m not into the whole ‘technically we’re not biological’ situation.” Instantly, Jason recoiled and leapt back. “God, no! You’re - what - sixteen?” He grinned. “You’re far too young for me, little sis.” Stephanie laughed, relieved to have that one cleared up. Jason stood in the doorway, ready to leave her alone with her thoughts. “And don’t be late for dinner. I worked really hard on it.”
♦ ♦ 🦇 ♦ ♦
Lighting arced across the sky, quickly followed by a clap of thunder as Batwoman crouched on a ratty, dirty rooftop, the rain wetting the hair beneath her red wig while running down the sides of her mask. Kate shivered, the icy water pattering against her suit and making everything colder. She could have been inside, sipping some hot cocoa with Maggie, but instead she was freezing her ass off outside, a pair of binoculars glued to her eyes as she staked out the apartment Noctua’s bodyguard had mentioned. If she was right about this, then she would know for sure that the man at Noctua’s side was Black Spider, whether Noctua was in league with the Penguin, and from there she could bring the bastard to justice. Seeing that the apartment was indeed empty, Kate clipped the binoculars to her belt, clasped both sides of her cape and made a leap off the rooftop, slowly gliding downward towards the roof of the apartment building before finally touching down in front of a skylight leading inside. Kate slipped her left hand into her right glove, pulling out an electronic lockpick. Kate dismantled the lock and pried open the window, careful as to not let too much of the rain get into the apartment as she slipped inside, and closed it behind her. She leapt down to the ground floor, landing with a soft pap. Standing up straight, Kate scanned her surroundings.. A spartan kitchen sat in the corner of the room, built with wooden cabinets and a granite countertop. A single mattress was stuffed into another corner of the room next to a window, resting on a cheap metal bed frame, with no blankets or bed sheets. A small TV sat on a stack of boxes by the wall nearest the front door leading, flanked by a rug laid neatly across the middle of the floor. The apartment was small and bare. Kate furrowed her brows, eyeing each part of the room while attempting to deduce where a mercenary would hide his gear. Underneath the bed was an obvious choice, so Kate skulked over to the bed frame, crouching to peer underneath. Nothing but dust and a few books. This was to be expected; a seasoned operative like Black Spider wouldn’t put his gear in a place so easy to find. Instead, he’d likely put it behind a few layers of obstacles. Turning her attention towards the rug, Kate knelt down, placing her hand on its hand-woven fabric. Her old squadmate Leo liked to hide cigarettes underneath their bunk room’s rug, placing a few packs in a compartment between the floorboards hidden beneath. Kate gripped the side of the rug hard, tossing it aside and inspecting what was beneath it. Bingo. The trapdoor wasn’t as obvious as the one back at her bunk, but the marked absence of the dust that littered the rest of the apartment gave it away. Kate slid her fingers underneath the hidden latch and lifted to reveal a small black compartment. A black-and-purple suit with ruby goggles sat neatly folded. This was Black Spider’s suit, and now she knew for certain that this entire apartment was that bastard's base of operations. Suddenly, the sound of keys jangled from behind the door: someone was trying to get in. Quickly throwing the trapdoor back down and flipping the rug back into place, Kate used the bed as a launchpad to leap back onto the skylight, pulling herself up before handing off of the inside of the window. Glancing downward, a conversation could be heard as Noctua’s bodyguard walked into the apartment with a taller man with a cracked face and long grey hair. “I don’t mean to be rude, Father, but…” said the bodyguard, now confirmed as the assassin Black Spider, “I just wasn’t expecting you.” “I was passing through, Johnny, still set on my search for any remnants of the bloodline, but I’ve come up with nothing.” said the older man, a clear authority infused with his voice. From above, Kate searched the man’s face the best she could for any recognition, hoping it would aid in Betty’s investigation into Black Spider’s allies, but he truly seemed to be a stranger. “I trust you’ve been doing an effective job?” “Yes, Father!” said Black Spider, “I’ve been performing to the best of my abilities.” The older man nodded, seemingly satisfied with the answer, “That’s good, I’m sure you’re doing a fine job, Johnny.” “Thank you, Father.” the assassin replied, rubbing the back of his head. “I’m sorry to hear your latest search for the remainders came up empty.” “It is what it is. Perhaps there are none left alive,” said the older man, “Perhaps we did too good a job before. The search has turned up only old bones and relics, nothing concrete. Figuring I’d run out of leads, I decided to return to Gotham. I felt it would be good to receive your mission report in person this time.” “Right,” said Spider, quickly tightening his tie, “Ask away and I’ll answer.” Kate pondered the conversation happening below her, especially the part about a bloodline. Was this the mission of the hidden conspiracy Betty had spoken of? From the looks of it, this was about more than money, judging from the older man’s affection for the assassin, and the method by which Black Spider addressed him. “The al Ghul child?” asked the older man. “Not in Gotham, but he passed through.” Black Spider answered. “And Jason Todd?” "He still doesn't know his true heritage. Sister's still out of the picture. He thinks she's dead." “The UN Agent?” “Here in the city, much to my surprise. But none the wiser to anything, including what my business is in Gotham.” “And Grayson?” "Exposed. New daddy’s dead. Police partner's out of commission. Now he's saddled with another stray. Plus the city's turning against the whole family." “And what about your sister?” “Nothing. She can’t be in Gotham, I searched hard enough. I was hoping you’d find her.” The older man sighed, walking up to Black Spider and placing his hand on the assassin’s shoulder, “I’ve had no luck in that area either, but still, I’m proud of the work you’ve been doing while I’ve been gone, and I’m very happy to have you back into the fold. I hope that, in the future, I can entrust you with even more responsibility.” Black Spider seemed to tremble a little in reverence to the older man, his breath shaky as he nodded, “Thank you, Father. It’s my greatest wish to earn your appreciation.” The older man pulled the plainclothes assassin into a brief but tight embrace for a few moments, smiling as he did. Kate listened keenly and heard the man whisper in his son’s ear. “You are doing great work, son.” Then, the older man let go and moved back. He checked his wristwatch and frowned, “I have something coming up, we’ll have to finish this later. Stay out of trouble.” “Yes, Father,” said Black Spider, watching as the older man turned around and left the apartment, leaving him and a surprised Kate in the room. Kate kept her grip, placing her hand on the glass pane to slip back out again. While this would be the good moment to ambush Black Spider, he was a metahuman assassin, and he was more than a match for Kate, Betty and Helena together when last they fought. Kate needed a better opportunity, a trap of some kind. But now she knew where to find him, Kate only had to retreat to her apartment and come up with a more concrete plan. Moving towards the pane, Kate was about halfway through when lightning struck once again, igniting the night sky with bright light. As the light hit Kate, it cast a shadow through the skylight, a shadow that appeared right in front of the assassin. Seeing her figure against the bright light, Black Spider whirled around to find Batwoman quickly rolling out of the window, the pane slamming shut behind her. Tumbling onto the rain soaked rooftop, Kate began to make a run for the edge, her hand drifting over her grapnel gun. As she got closer, the sound of glass shattering reached her ears as a metallic web shot up the side of the building, latching onto the edge and prompting Kate to slide to a stop. A hand flew up to grab the edge, and Black Spider clambered onto the roof, having quickly donned his wrist gauntlets. Standing up straight, he glared at her with rage-fueled eyes and threw himself at the heroine, unleashing a flurry of quick and precise strikes on her. As good as Kate was, she wasn’t quite as good as Black Spider. Despite her best efforts to block his attacks, Black Spider still got enough hits in. He threw a palm strike, hitting her square in the jaw and crashing her teeth together. As she instinctively raised her arms to protect her face, the assassin threw another punch at her side, cracking her ribs with a single move. Kate swung her head into his, cracking him right in the nose and causing him to stumble back as she shuffled away, clutching her side. Tasting blood in her mouth, Kate wiped her lips. Black Spider shook his head before making a charge for Kate again. Realizing she had to end this in one single motion if she wanted to get away, Kate planted her feet, waiting in anticipation with arms raised as Black Spider jumped at her, catching her in the chest with a flying kick. Having braced in advance for an attack like this, Kate smiled through crimson stained teeth and grabbed hold of his leg, using both her body weight and the momentum of his attack to pivot them both, swinging him with all her might before letting go, sending Black Spider sailing down into the skylight, destroying the panes as he fell back into his apartment. Kate limped to the edge of the rooftop with haste, spreading her cape before pushing off of the building and gliding away as fast as the wind could take her. Feeling herself falter, Kate angled herself to fly into a nearby alley before her grip on her cape loosened, her muscles weak and aching. She plummeted, colliding with the concrete and cracking her mask. Groaning, Kate dragged herself up the nearest wall and forced herself to walk down the way. Confident that the assassin couldn’t follow her after pushing off from the roof, she stumbled out of the alley, electing to return to her apartment to recover. He had bested her for now, but now she knew where he lived, and Black Spider was going down.
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